NEW ONANISM

From: "P. O. Box 2321" <box2321@aracnet.com> Date: Mon, 20 Sep 1999 16:19:44 -0700
To: modemac@modemac.com, i.stang@subgenius.com Posted-To: alt.slack
Subject: New Onanism and [Re: Fuck the Conspiracy] Organization: Church of the SubGenius
Reply-To: onan@subgenius.com

[This message has also been posted.]
Modemac <modemac@modemac.com>:
>The dollar bill is a requirement for one of those strange laws governing the legality of surveys; it's the reason why people taking part in the Nielsen ratings "TV diary" system also receive a dollar in the mail with their survey. So the dollar gets me a bag of salt and vinegar chips, and the survey goes in the trash.

>And people wonder why we call it "The Conspiracy!"

Dude, have you forgotten - "One Dollar for Salvation!" When the Con gives me money I always turn it over to the SubGenius Foundation, where they have the proper processing systems to remove the 'taint. [1]

[1] 'taint: SubGenius lingo for a Conspiracy 'sin' of being forbidden. "Some people believe in flying saucers but it 'taint so."

- O.

--
Rev. Dr. Onan Canobite <onan@subgenius.com> http://www.subgenius.com/ Call Onan's Voice Mail Toll-Free 1-877-324-6289 (member 503-900-122) Send $30 unto The SubGenius Foundation Box 140306 Dallas TX 75214 USA

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