When Lemurs Attack!

From: nu-monet <nothing@succeeds.com>

Lemurs eat newborn baby

A pack of lemurs has eaten a newborn baby, according
to reports on Zambian state TV.

The pack of cute little ring-tailed furry assassins
swallowed the baby within minutes of it being born near
Serenje, a town in the centre of the country, ZNBC

Joyce Mibenge was walking to work in fields just over
a mile from her home when she went into labour.

A ZNBC reporter said the woman spent several minutes
recovering from the birth but when she opened her eyes:
"She saw a pack of happy lemurs picking their teeth with
the fingers of the baby with the rest already swallowed."

She ran home, but villagers found no evidence of the
lemurs when they searched for them. Some villagers
blamed alien abduction or witchcraft. A local shaman
was found to be spreading rumors to that effect, hoping
to sell "alien-proof, anti-witchcraft" t-shirts to the
local residents.

The station said Ms Mibenge didn't know whether her baby
had been a boy or a girl. She was pretty sure it was
one or the other.

Oscar Kalasa, an employee with the country's Daily Mail
newspaper told Ananova: "This story has really touched
people here. When such a thing happens, it's impossible
not to be shocked. I mean, lemurs, they're from
Madagascar, right? Well, how the hell did they get here?"

"There is no nu-monet. There is only Zuul."

Back to document index

Original file name: When Lemurs Attack! - converted on Friday, 29 June 2001, 22:34

This page was created using TextToHTML. TextToHTML is a free software for Macintosh and is (c) 1995,1996 by Kris Coppieters