WAR WITH MARS -- CRUCIAL REVELATION FROM ONAN!

Dr. Onan Canobite wrote this to me:

"I had a potentially vital insight into the war on Mars... I realized (for that moment, anyway) that THIS planet is Mars and the fourth planet from our Sun is the REAL Earth. The X-ists DID come to 'Earth' on July 5th, 1998, and we fucked up by being here on 'Mars.' That some of us feel out of place is because we are the true Martians, we really belong here, while the rest are from Earth. We're at war with Mars all the time because we are not where we belong nor are they, and we also don't even know we're on the wrong planet. Who knows what's going on on the 'Earth' - perhaps they have their own Church of the SubGenius. Thus the 'war on Mars' becomes very, very complex, with endless levels of where the real Mars is and who the real Martians are. I want to clarify that at some point in the past - and it could have even been the recent past - planets three and four physically switched locations. Only small sections of the true Mars were transported to this false Earth-Mars; Amsterdam, Lemuria, Brushwood, etc. We SubGenii may or may not have been on the previous planet three, depending on whichever is funnier at that moment. This revelation entertained me for some time, and I now pass it along to you for further analysis. It could be a major Church theme, a minor Clench theme, or totally forgotten - praise "Bob," any outcome would give me Slack."

This may not make a lick of sense to any of you, but for me, it FILLS IN THE BLANKS -- explains EVERYTHING that's happened to me since long before HIGH SCHOO that hadn't already been explained by "Bob" in THE BOOK OF THE SUBGENIUS. It also conveniently explains hundreds of mysteries of science and contradictions in history and even the geological record -- everything from "the missing link" to ghosts and alcoholism! I think Onan may be on to something -- perhaps no less than the "KEY" to the "GATEWAY" of the "OEPENING" of the FINAL SUBGENIUS "BOOK"!!

We'll see, won't we.

In the meantime, I just finished copying our classic tape, Media Barrage 10, to CD, using the original masters. I have been preparing several new CDs and CD packages to add to the sCatalog. We'll have a "SPECIALLY PRICED CD SALE"! -- as soon as I get the packaging artwork done and htmled. I'm also dealing with reprints of HIGH WEIRDNESS BY MAIL and THREE FISTED TALES OF "BOB" (authors will be hearing from me very shortly), and starting to pull together stockpiled stuff for a new Tales book and even a STARK FIST reprint book. These have all become "ACTIVE STACKS" in my office, now that the Summer of Devivals is over. Consequently I'm behind on all but the most critical email (and the LEAST critical).

THE HOUR OF SLACK however is going stronger than ever, and I've yet to have to resort to reruns since we went digital. Thanks to Bachner's diligent MP3-ing and so forth, we're getting DAILY interest from radio pirates and even "real" stations. We even got "Streaming Site of the Day" just today I think, from somebody... Working digitally is making all the difference, although I'm just now entering a new learning curve regarding computer audio (including music).

The award winning British animation company, THE BOLEX BROTHERS, is doing something with THE BRAG OF THE SUBGENIUS and I have been working with them on that, from afar, mainly as voice talent!

I had to valiantly fight a cold, several computer hardware battles, and to rescue broken video dubbing gear, but by Gobbs I have climbed right BACK on that horse, so WATCH OUT CONSPIRACY!! The Sacred Scribe and the Armies of "Bob" are ON THE WARPATH!!


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