Question: Am I a Reverend or a Doctor?


From: "Rev. Ivan Stang"
Newsgroups: alt.binaries.slack
Date: Thu, Apr 18, 2002

In article , Rev
Flamegrape wrote:

> I paid my $30 a few months ago. Because I've been blessed with so much
> slack, I haven't gotten around to mailing in my postcard to register my name
> in the Book of Life.
>
> But what's my "church name"? I know my name is Flamegrape. But am I a
> Reverend or a Doctor? I know I'm no Saint or whut-not. But I wanted to know
> if there is a general difference between Doctor and Reverend.

If you sent in $30 you're a Reverend whether you want to be or not.

>
> Is a Reverend good for preachin' Bob's gobblespell? A public speaker? I
> ain't that, that's fer sure.

No, it's just somebody now without $30.

>
> Is a Doctor a musician or an artist? If so, that's me! I'm a computer artist
> and amature sound engineer and videographer.

If you are the kind of artist or musician who can't stop no matter how
awful your output is, then you're a Doktor.

If you manipulate and lie to everyone around you to enrich yourself
with Slack, and generally make a loud spectacle of yourself in doing
so, then you fit the Pope profile.

If you do The Stuff That's Not Fun that all the other types avoid even
thinking about, you're a Saint, you PORE BASTARD. Dobbs loves the
Saints best because they give more money.

>
> I want to know some info about this before I send off my postcard. I want to
> do the right thing and not mislead any of you!

And YOU CALL YOURSELF A SUBGENIUS?!?!?

>
> And is it okay if i send my postacard to the old Dallas address, like it's
> printed on the card already?

Sure it'll just take longer.

>
> Your humble master,
>
> Rev.? Dr.? Flamegrape
>
>

--
4th Stangian Orthodox MegaFisTemple Lodge of the Wrath of Dobbs Yeti,
Resurrected   (Rev. Ivan Stang, prop.)    
P.O. Box 181417, Cleveland, OH 44118  (fax 216-320-9528)
A subsidiary of:
The SubGenius Foundation, Inc. / P.O. Box 204206, Austin, TX 78720-4206    
Dobbs-Approved Authorized Commercial Outreach of The Church of the SubGenius
SubSITE: http://www.subgenius.com        
For SubGenius Biz & Orders: call toll free to 1-888-669-2323
or email: jesus@subgenius.com                                                
PRABOB

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Monseignor Tartarus Sanctus

Biovizier Flamegrape wrote:
>

Biovizier is nice. There are a number of other religious titles that are
somewhat underused. Inquisitor is one, Meister and Mullah, of course.
Then there are the descriptives, like Bool the Hermit, Rush the
ecstatic, etc. Or you could consult a professional:

http://www.prestigious-titles.com/intro.html

--
Monseignor Tartarus Sanctus

Cathareuse Ordre de Frites
Salvian HP Synod

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "Rev. Ivan Stang"

In article , Rev. Xenu v
0.3 wrote:

> On Tue, 16 Apr 2002 20:37:11 -0700, dyskolos
> wrote:
>
> >Rev Flamegrape wrote:
> >>
> >> I paid my $30 a few months ago. Because I've been blessed with so much
> >> slack, I haven't gotten around to mailing in my postcard to register my
> >> name
> >> in the Book of Life.
> >>
> >> But what's my "church name"? I know my name is Flamegrape. But am I a
> >> Reverend or a Doctor? I know I'm no Saint or whut-not. But I wanted to know
> >> if there is a general difference between Doctor and Reverend.
> >>
> >
> >You have the OBLIGATION to call yourself any damn thing you please.
> >There's no difference between any two or more phony made-up titles.
> >Anybody who tells you you have to do or be something before you are
> >allowed to make up a name or title for yourself is an evil liar.  But
> >then, if you had any sense you wouldn't have paid your $30.  So now
> >you have to pay ME $30 dollars to tell you what your true name is.
> >And it's spelled SUCKER.
> Nail.
>  head.
>  hit.


I guess neither one of you brilliant super-detectives ever heard of
"X-Day" and "the Escape Vessels of the Sex Goddesses." We'll wave to
you "super-geniuses" down below from our ascending Stairways to Heaven,
grinning out the portholes at you from around our huge bags of pot,
money, and good comic books, pitying you through the murky
half-consciousness of our Blowjob That Never Ends.

Actually I believe Dispepsios here DID send in his $30 back when it was
$10 or so, and even if he didn't, I don't think you'll find a bigger
Sucker for "Bob" in the whole wide world except possibly for me.

(I incidentally actually DID send in my $30 just before the alleged
July 5 1998.)

--
4th Stangian Orthodox MegaFisTemple Lodge of the Wrath of Dobbs Yeti,
Resurrected   (Rev. Ivan Stang, prop.)    
P.O. Box 181417, Cleveland, OH 44118  (fax 216-320-9528)
A subsidiary of:
The SubGenius Foundation, Inc. / P.O. Box 204206, Austin, TX 78720-4206    
Dobbs-Approved Authorized Commercial Outreach of The Church of the SubGenius
SubSITE: http://www.subgenius.com        
For SubGenius Biz & Orders: call toll free to 1-888-669-2323
or email: jesus@subgenius.com                                                
PRABOB

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: IPRC Info

> Ass.
> Kiss.
> Mine.

The lesson you should take away from all this:  Only ask Subgenii questions
when you want a buttload of conflicting answers.  When you *WANT* 'em, we
got em.  

Personally, I prefer not to be called Reverend, Doktor, Pope or Saint.  I am
a Sexton.  I will bury ALL OF YOU under the soil of Planet X.  Then I'll
build a roller coaster out of all y'alls' bones.

iggy topolino