Subject: Best News Ever

From: "Rev. Ivan Stang" <stang@subgenius.com>
Newsgroups: alt.slack
Date: Tue, Oct 15, 2002 2:18 PM

My son got a job.

A good one! What he was looking for. Not like the one he already had,
which was too much like all the ones I ever had in the film business.

I had no idea what a relief this news would be for ME. I didn't even
know I had this quarter-ton weight on me until it was gone. Makes
sense, though. I had blown my savings and retirement on his education,
so seeing him make minimum wage cutting bad actors' demo reels in an
office that smelled like dog pee, for a crazy man, was all too
depressingly familiar. Now, however, at this new job, he'll be making
more than I ever did, just to start, at a real classy joint that makes
zillion dollar commercials. Doing a little of everything, which is
good, because that's what he does best.

Also, his short film was accepted into a real film festival, as opposed
to the tiny kind that's struggling for attention.

The lad has several advantages that I did not, such as looks and sense,
but seems to utterly lack the self-destructive tendencies that I, in my
early '70s coolness and low self esteem, possessed at his age. So, I
have very high hopes that ALL is not in VAIN, though it might still be
vanity.

Daughter-wise, my mini-brag is that Sivet moved back to Texas from
Tennessee, driving a huge U-haul truck pulling a trailer with her car
on it, HERSELF! And she hasn't hit me up for money but ONCE since she
left 3 home years ago. She is a BIG GIRL! Looking at nice cheap Texas
colleges.

And, both kids made it through their teens without getting tattoos on
face or extremities. ((WHEW!!! CLOSE one!))

Everything is perfect.

This has been my brag.

If anyone who reads this is as lucky as me, or as lucky as Dr. Legume,
then you too are in the Lucky Motherfuckers Clench.

Praise "Bob" and Hail Connie.

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Subject: Re: Best News Ever
From: "Quin" <quin00@earthlink.net>

Congrats on your news slash rant sir.
Take it from a parent (and grand parent) that those kinds of stories aren't
all that common. I can only report woeful stories of laziness and insanity
here in the core of the suburbs. Son-in-laws who are listless and jobless
most of the time, and when they are employed, it is only to flip burgers at
the proverbial teen wasteland slash food factory. I know, I know...everyone
has to deal with these things sometimes, but it just seems that this
"attitude" is ever persistent in too much of the population these days.
Maybe it is the proliferation of government drug ads brain washing those
young minds into believing that it is all just a waste of time to put forth
any effort anymore. I can't blame it on skateboards and video games. I just
don't see a connection. Anyway, keep them kids safe, and buy them a ice
cream cone every once and awhile.

Remeber: Ignorance killed the cat. Curiosity was framed.

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Subject: Re: Best News Ever
From: Her Ladyship Lilith von Fraumench <lilith@ZubJenius.com>

<stang@subgenius.com> wrote:

> If anyone who reads this is as lucky as me, or as lucky as Dr. Legume,
> then you too are in the Lucky Motherfuckers Clench.

They keep turning down my application to the clench, even though I've
got Thea. Guess it's because we ate all the cake.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

Subject: Re: Best News Ever
From: "Rev. Ivan Stang" <stang@subgenius.com>

Quin <quin00@earthlink.net> wrote:

> Remeber: Ignorance killed the cat. Curiosity was framed.

Thanks... there's so much godawful news in the world and even on
alt.slack that I thought I'd be really WEIRD and STRANGE and a "HIGH
UNPREDICTABLE," and post good news.

Good luck with those son in laws.

Is there ever really ANY son in law who is truly WORTHY, though?

----------------------------------------------------------------------

Subject: Re: Best News Ever
From: nenslo <nenslo@yahooX.com>

"Rev. Ivan Stang" wrote:

> If anyone who reads this is as lucky as me, or as lucky as Dr. Legume,
> then you too are in the Lucky Motherfuckers Clench.

I am a founding member of that clench and declare it OFFICIALLY CLOSED
TO NEW MEMBERS.

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Original file name: Best News Ever - converted on Monday, 21 July 2003, 13:44