send complaints to: abuse@rightwingdeathsquads.com

From: "nu-monet v4.0" <nothing@succeeds.com>
Newsgroups: alt.slack,alt.friday
Date: Sat, May 4, 2002 4:39 PM

http://www.reuters.com/news_article.jhtml?type=humannews&StoryID=915687

Far-Right Militia Starts Complaints Line

BOGOTA, Colombia (Reuters) - Colombia's far-right
paramilitaries, seeking to clean up their bloody
image to be accepted as a legitimate political
movement, have launched an Internet complaints
hotline.

The United Self-Defense Forces of Colombia, an
outlawed militia known by the Spanish initials "AUC,"
said on Thursday that members of the public who suffer
"excesses" at the hands of its fighters can write in
to a new e-mail address.

The group, which claims more than 10,000 members and
targets leftist rebels fighting a 38-year-old war,
killed about 1,000 civilians in 2001 alone, according
to the government.

In one case, AUC members killed 27 peasants with
sledgehammers and stones in the village of Chengue,
accusing them of collaborating with Marxist guerrillas.

But senior AUC leader Carlos Castano, who admits to
having killed many times, wants right-wing militiamen
to commit fewer massacres and cut back links with drug
traffickers. He aims to win the AUC -- which human
rights groups say has continued to kill just as many
people as ever -- a seat at any negotiating table to
end Colombia's bloody conflict.

"Any accusations or complaints should be directed to
Commander Adolfo Paz at the electronic address

auc_inspeccion@hotmail.com

said the announcement on the AUC Web site

http://www.colombialibre.org

...

--
When asked whether the Bush administration now
recognised President Chavez as Venezuela's
legitimate President, a spokesman for President
Bush conceded that although Mr Chavez 'was
democratically elected' one had to bear in mind
that 'legitimacy is something that is conferred
not just by a majority of the voters, however'.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: sanfordandson40@hotmail.com (Kat Suit Model)

"nu-monet v4.0" <nothing@succeeds.com> wrote in message news:<3CD446F8.7D70@succeeds.com>...
> http://www.reuters.com/news_article.jhtml?type=humannews&StoryID=915687
>
> Far-Right Militia Starts Complaints Line

***** SniP ******

> "Any accusations or complaints should be directed to
> Commander Adolfo Paz at the electronic address
>
> auc_inspeccion@hotmail.com

Hotmail eh? Some poor American-trained death squad soldier is going to
have to be reassigned to sifting through hundreds of advertisements a
day for insurance, credit cards, porn, penis pumps, herbal viagra, and
weight loss scams. Poetic justice indeed.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "Two Beans" <twobeans@godhatesyou.com>

"nu-monet v4.0" <nothing@succeeds.com> wrote in message
news:3CD446F8.7D70@succeeds.com...
> http://www.reuters.com/news_article.jhtml?type=humannews&StoryID=915687
>
> Far-Right Militia Starts Complaints Line
>

Here is my formal letter of complaint:

(Start letter)

Subgect: I would like to register a complaint.

Dear Sirs,

It has come to my attention that you have slaughtered a good number of
fellows. I am distressed at this thought. The reason being is that I have
not spoken to a few friends of mine in the United States. Now, I know that
it is a highly unlikely chance that any of my friends were or even had
visited your beautiful though bloodcoated country, but there is the slimmest
possibility that they could have been casualties of your militiamen's
murderous ways.

Thus I would like to suggest that you cease, or at least taper off your
bloodthirsty swathe of terror. Should such a thing happen, I would have even
less of a chance of loosing friends to the hail of fire you bathe anyone in
that stands in your way.

And considering since they'd never enter a run-down dangerous 3rd world
country like Colombia, I'd say those odds would be suitably slim.

Thank you for your time in reading this letter. I look forward to your
correspondence in the future.

Yours in "Bob",
Gary "Two Beans" Jordan (Guido "Dos Frijoles" Jordan)

P.S. Send us in America some more good pot, okay. The president is cracking
down hard up here on that kinda thing.

(End letter)

The Reverend Doktor Bishop Two Beans,
Pope of the East Bay,
Sir Minister Sinister

http://www.eyeofthewarp.com/twobeans
http://www.eyeofthewarp.com/nhgh
http://mp3.com/twobeans

"There, the spark leaps to life. The Golden Age quivers on the brink of
creation. Live, my machine! Live my savior! You have my breath... You have
my dream, my dream."
-The Residents, "Failure / Reconstruction" from the album Mark of the Mole

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