From: iDRMRSR <idrmrsr@subgenius.com>
Newsgroups: alt.slack
Date: Mon, Oct 7, 2002 6:59 PM
OK, so I know the usual stuff about why nobody wants
to kill animals and
eat them.
But with modern science, one could very humanely remove
a portion of an
animal's flesh, and it would totally recover! The question
I propose
is, would vegans eat THAT?
I mean, you could take out a kidney, half a liver, and
all of a spleen.
The cow/pig/sheep/goat/chicken/etc. would go on living
a perfectly happy
life to a ripe old age. No suffering required, as you
could use modern
anesthetics and rehab the animal just like people do
every day.
You could remove skin and grow that back! Even a good
hunk of
tenderloin. With proper nursing care, the animal could
even regenerate
the tissue for another meal. Its soul would be totally
intact to merge
with Buddha or whatever, completely unscathed. And
you would have a
nice renewable protein source.
A whole industry could emerge. Food surgeons. There
would be no reason
ever to restrict your diet again. I believe this would
answer every
vegan objection to eating meat. No more butchers.
Just take your
animal to the food hospital and highly skilled surgeons
would remove the
extraneous and vestigial components, and freeze them
in little baggies
for you to have for dinner.
[*]
-----
----------------------------------------------------------------------
From: "Philo Drummond" <philo@subgenius.com>
Dear iDRMRSR,
What a great idea!! I'd like to suggest we train the
animals to be the Food
Surgeons. We could probably easily teach the carnivores
to operate on the
herbivores. Then the humans could just confine their
flesh mining efforts to
the meat eaters. What do you think?
Philo
----------------------------------------------------------------------
From: iDRMRSR <idrmrsr@subgenius.com>
Philo Drummond:
>>What do you think?
Why that's an excellent idea. Reverse the food chain
entirely.
Everybody makes nice nice to everybody else.
Nirvana achieved! Through science...
[*]
-----
----------------------------------------------------------------------
From: John Starrett <jstarret@carbon.cudenver.edu>
Philo Drummond wrote:
> What do you think?
Good idea. Ginko lizard tails grow back after severance,
some frogs' legs grow back after removal; there are
all
kinds of possibilities. My wife severed the tip of her
right
hand "fuck" finger when she was two, and that
grew back. We
could have legal cannibalism!
Another possibility is cultured tissue. They grow skin
for
grafts in petri dishes... think of the food fun we could
have once they figure out how to grow any organ, or
even
mutant meat!
But coolest of all will be when they grow mastodon or
triceratops in the lab. We can eat like Fred Flintstone!
--
John Starrett
----------------------------------------------------------------------
From: nenslo <nenslo@yahooX.com>
>
> "iDRMRSR" <idrmrsr@subgenius.com>
wrote in message
> news:18F745CB5BECD4AC.E0D00918D3F04BF3.CAE8C66089FCF66A@lp.airnews.net...
> > OK, so I know the usual stuff about why nobody
wants to kill animals and
> > eat them.
> >
> > But with modern science, one could very humanely
remove a portion of an
> > animal's flesh, and it would totally recover!
The question I propose
> > is, would vegans eat THAT?
> >
You mean would people who don't eat meat eat meat?
The answer is SHUT UP you stupid reeking flatulent sack
of shit.
My challenge to YOU: Try not being such a fucking halfwit.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
From: iDRMRSR <idrmrsr@subgenius.com>
NENSLO:
>>The answer is SHUT UP you stupid reeking flatulent
sack of shit.
My challenge to YOU: Try not being such a fucking halfwit.<<
How discourteous of you!
I post a logical, well-reasoned proposal which would
allow vegans to
enjoy, with me, the great Slack I get when indulging
in meat products.
And you call my hygiene, wit, intelligence, and personal
gas management
into question.
For shame. But as I am uncommonly gracious, I will
overlook this
diatribe.
Let those children of logic be heard, sir, those whose
emotions are not
so easily roused! Make way for the intercourse of great
thinkers, and
hold your tongue.
[*]
-----
----------------------------------------------------------------------
From: "electric walrus" <elfrijolesestupidos@yahoo.com>
There you have it, folks, a new, renewable food source.
I personally feel
that removing chunks of vegans should be done, both
for food and for sport.
I will support your food surgeons.
Unless you mean doing it to animals. I hate cows, I
belieive they should be
butchered, and I would only eat cow meat removed this
way if they are given
anestethic for this.
--
"I don't have a problem with varying opinions....when
they are stated
*in my opinion..." - Brenda
----------------------------------------------------------------------
From: Joe Cosby <joecosby@SPAMBLOCKmindspring.com>
On Mon, 07 Oct 2002 18:59:23 -0400, iDRMRSR <idrmrsr@subgenius.com>
wrote:
>OK, so I know the usual stuff about why nobody wants
to kill animals and
>eat them.
>
>But with modern science, one could very humanely
remove a portion of an
>animal's flesh, and it would totally recover! The
question I propose
>is, would vegans eat THAT?
>
>I mean, you could take out a kidney, half a liver,
and all of a spleen.
>The cow/pig/sheep/goat/chicken/etc. would go on
living a perfectly happy
>life to a ripe old age. No suffering required,
as you could use modern
>anesthetics and rehab the animal just like people
do every day.
>
>You could remove skin and grow that back! Even
a good hunk of
>tenderloin. With proper nursing care, the animal
could even regenerate
>the tissue for another meal. Its soul would be
totally intact to merge
>with Buddha or whatever, completely unscathed.
And you would have a
>nice renewable protein source.
>
>A whole industry could emerge. Food surgeons.
There would be no reason
>ever to restrict your diet again. I believe this
would answer every
>vegan objection to eating meat. No more butchers.
Just take your
>animal to the food hospital and highly skilled surgeons
would remove the
>extraneous and vestigial components, and freeze
them in little baggies
>for you to have for dinner.
You know if that really is the reason, if a vegetarian
bases his her
being a vegetarianism on the fact that eating an animal
causes it
pain, then by the same logic the vegetarian is comittng
an even
greater sin by not allowing him her self to be eating
be carnivores.
A starving tiger suffers pain from hunger. Is this
pain somehow less
than a chicken getting it's head lopped off?
And by going to Africa/India and laying down on the
ground until the
hungry tiger eats them, they are also helping the environment.
Not
only are they contributing to the survival of an endangered
species,
but they are also removing a large scale waste/entropy
producer from
the ecosystem.
i mean, I'm just pointing it out.
--
Joe Cosby
http://joecosby.home.mindspring.com
I always say I'd much rather be around someone who comes
right out and
admits he's a hateful intolerant son of a bitch than
someone who's
always calling people down for not coming up to their
noble standards
while pretending it's for everybody's benefit.
- nenslo
----------------------------------------------------------------------
From: jlwn111@att.net (I AM J'lahn.)
iDRMRSR <idrmrsr@subgenius.com> wrote in message
news:<18F745CB5BECD4AC.E0D00918D3F04BF3.CAE8C66089FCF66A@lp.airnews.net>...
>
> But with modern science, one could very humanely
remove a portion of an
> animal's flesh, and it would totally recover!
The question I propose
> is, would vegans eat THAT?
>
No, they would not. But as someone who is MOSTLY Vegan
(yes, I am
almost there - just a little bit of dairy still left
to go!) I would
probably consent to eating replicated animal-based food.
You know,
straight out of the pattern buffers. Made from its basic
molecular
components.
Go to http://www.stinsv.com/TNg/rikera.htm -- find and
play the clip
from Riker called:
"We no longer enslave animals for food purposes"...
Pretty much sums it up.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
From: John Starrett <jstarret@carbon.cudenver.edu>
"I AM J'lahn." wrote:
>
> "We no longer enslave animals for food purposes"...
>
> Pretty much sums it up.
Suppose there was an animal that shed tasty limbs on
a
regular basis. If you found a freshly shed limb, would
you
cook it and eat it? If not, why not?
--
John Starrett
----------------------------------------------------------------------
From: "Blackout" <blackout@404Subgenius.com>
you mean like when I commanded you to EAT MY SHIT on
IRC or else I wouldn't
speak to you and you gulped it right down?
har DE har har har, you fucking DOINK
----------------------------------------------------------------------
From: Arbane the Terrible <arbane@attbi.com>
Nice try, you FAKE. The REAL J'lahn isn't posting again
here until the
full moon.
You'd better be GONE by then, or he'll....um...QUOTE NUMBERS at you!
--
"Remember, the plural of 'moron' is 'focus group'."
-- James A. Wolf
Original file name: Challenge to Vegans!.txt - converted on Thursday, 29 May 2003, 19:15
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