HOROSCOPIC HOGWASH

From: nenslo <nenslo@yahooX.com>
Newsgroups: alt.slack
Date: Sat, Sep 7, 2002 2:58 AM

Horoscope (by astrocenter.com)
You are like a chameleon, dear Nenslo, adjusting your personality to
suit the person you are with. It is important to you to get along well
with others, so you do whatever it takes to make that happen. Not
surprisingly, you have developed some pretty amazing social skills
over the years. Today you are likely to have the chance to put them
into action. Turn on the charm at whatever party or group function you
attend today, as you may meet someone who could become quite important
to your career development.

What a load of crap.

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From: "nu-monet v5.0" <nothing@succeeds.com>

nenslo wrote:

Horoscope (by nu-monet)
You are like curvee, dear Nenslo. You ignored them and
now there are thousands. It starts as a painful itch,
then becomes a burning, stabbing pain. It will be named
after your doctor. Plastic will be your only friend--
cherish it while it lasts. Underage family member finally
agrees to have sex with you, but only if you get them good
and drunk first. Don't waste money on tattoos--nothing
can hide those scars. "Urgency" and "frequency" take on
a whole new meaning. Psychics will lead dogs to your
remains--the source of the contamination.

--
"As unpleasant as you may find it, remember
that nuclear winter is eminently preferable
to the brief yet intense nuclear summer that
precedes it."
-- nu-monet

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From: michael_amberwind@yahoo.com (Rajah of the Orange Groves)

I like your horoscope better than mine. Can I have yours?

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "Rev. Ivan Stang" <stang@subgenius.com>

In article <3D79A38C.7D63462A@yahooX.com>, nenslo <nenslo@yahooX.com>
wrote:

> Horoscope (by astrocenter.com)

You must have nailed the absolutely least appropriate possible
horoscope!

> You are like a chameleon, dear Nenslo, adjusting your personality to
> suit the person you are with.

AHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

> It is important to you to get along well
> with others, so you do whatever it takes to make that happen.

HEEEEE hyaaaw hyaawww hyaaaawwww

> Not
> surprisingly, you have developed some pretty amazing social skills
> over the years.

Gyuk gyuk gyuk

> Today you are likely to have the chance to put them
> into action. Turn on the charm at whatever party or group function you
> attend today, as you may meet someone who could become quite important
> to your career development.

Like that protestor at the used book place.

>
> What a load of crap.

Astrology, a load of crap?? Oh come now.

As a former SubGenius Mayjiccckkian once said to me, after noticing
that her dreadful life had not at all followed her lovely Chart, "....
but... but... if ASTROLOGY is bullshit, then.... then that means ALL of
Magick is bullshit!" From what I could tell, she did not later follow
through on that reasoning, and in fact later accused me of killing her
cat by remote-control Black Magic.

So don't mess with me or I'll kill your goldfish from right here in
Cleveland. Unless they're Aquarian fish -- the accursed Aquarians are
immune to my killing magic.If they're just in a plain bowl I can kill
them.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: friday@fridayjones.com (Friday Jones)

http://www.fridayjones.com/whoro.html

Melondramatic (adj) - Used to describe a large-breasted woman

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: saint bubba the damned <atropos@cbnet.ns.ca>

On Fri, 06 Sep 2002 23:58:20 -0700, nenslo <nenslo@yahooX.com> wrote:

>
>
>Horoscope (by astrocenter.com)
>You are like a chameleon, dear Nenslo, adjusting your personality to
>suit the person you are with. It is important to you to get along well
>with others, so you do whatever it takes to make that happen. Not
>surprisingly, you have developed some pretty amazing social skills
>over the years. Today you are likely to have the chance to put them
>into action. Turn on the charm at whatever party or group function you
>attend today, as you may meet someone who could become quite important
>to your career development.
>
>What a load of crap.
thats cause they're using the PINK planets for normal people. they're
completely disregarding the all important asteroids.....like MP#2483
Yeti, or #8573 Ivan. unfortunately, theres no asteroid named "Bob",
although there is a Bobone, which is damned close enough. We need a
letter campaign thingy to get minor planet 13013 named MWOWM. and a
Slack, and a Dobbs fer good measure. then mebbe asterofoolery would
work.

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Original file name: HOROSCOPIC HOGWASH.txt - converted on Monday, 21 July 2003, 13:48