Re: Dear Subgenius Traffic Sign Advisor

From: "Rev. Ivan Stang" <stang@subgenius.com>
Newsgroups: alt.slack
Date: Wed, Jul 10, 2002 10:30 AM

In article
<79FBBF4507308673.AC68A02FF60E41C1.1B845CAA97603514@lp.airnews.net>,
iDRMRSR <idrmrsr@subgenius.com> wrote:

> Stang:
> >>You are really one sick bastard, Mister Sister.
>
> Did you know you got a Bobbie Award for "Most Irrascible"?<<
>
> Wow, I'll take that as a compliment!
>
> I wuz gonna sign up for the Flesh Auction, but if you've checked the
> price of ham lately, it's about $4.99 a pound. That makes me worth
> THOUSANDS. And don't even talk about BACON.

Wow, makes my mouth water just thinking about it! Makes it water VOMIT!

--
4th Stangian Orthodox MegaFisTemple Lodge of the Wrath of Dobbs Yeti,
Resurrected (Rev. Ivan Stang, prop.)
P.O. Box 181417, Cleveland, OH 44118 (fax 216-320-9528)
A subsidiary of:
The SubGenius Foundation, Inc. / P.O. Box 204206, Austin, TX 78720-4206
Dobbs-Approved Authorized Commercial Outreach of The Church of the SubGenius
SubSITE: http://www.subgenius.com
For SubGenius Biz & Orders: call toll free to 1-888-669-2323
or email: jesus@subgenius.com
PRABOB

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "Rev. Magdalen" <magdalen@subgenius.com>

"noonblueapples" <noonblueapples@msn.com> wrote in message
news:aekhga.o68.ln@linproxy.jackstaedt...

> Sign in New Port Richey, FL (aka New Port Nowhere): S & M Truck
Accessories.
> Until recently along A19 just north of the main drag in Tarpon Springs, FL
> there was a sign that said:
> "Bill's Nursery and Guns. Concealed Weapons Classes".
>
> The traffic sign that I personally love is the uneven pavement sign, with
> the stick figure in the car on an angle. That just KILLS me. It used to be
> better though, they used to have his whole family in the car with him. I
> figure they either fell out on a sharp turn or he pushed them out to avoid
> the high costs of divorce/alimony/child support.

At the airport the Lord and I saw a hilarious sign of a stick figure
slipping and falling with his arms over his head and his feet flying out
from under him. "Uneven Surface, please be careful" it said. Then, out in
the parking lot, there was another sign with the same guy getting CRACKED in
the head by the parking gate automagic arm. "Gate may close without
warning, causing injury or damage to vehicle" it said.

Maybe you had to be there at 1 AM just getting home after X-Day, but WE
about peed our dicks when we saw them signs.

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From: John Starrett <jstarret@carbon.cudenver.edu>

"Rev. Magdalen" wrote:

> At the airport the Lord and I saw a hilarious sign of a stick figure
> slipping and falling with his arms over his head and his feet flying out
> from under him. "Uneven Surface, please be careful" it said. Then, out in
> the parking lot, there was another sign with the same guy getting CRACKED in
> the head by the parking gate automagic arm. "Gate may close without
> warning, causing injury or damage to vehicle" it said.
>
> Maybe you had to be there at 1 AM just getting home after X-Day, but WE
> about peed our dicks when we saw them signs.

Power tools have amusing pictographs also. The Makita table
saw I have shows a hand, a saw blade, and three fingers
flying off. My band saw, however, has a pictograph of
fingers cut almost all the way through. I guess the band saw
is safer.

--
John Starrett

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From: nenslo <nenslo@yahooX.com>

I was out driving and came to this sign that said STOP so I stopped.
I waited and waited for it to change to go and it never did so I said
the hell with this and just went. Ever since then I only stop for a
second when I get to one of those signs and then just go. I don't
have all day to sit around, I have thrift stores to go to.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: joecosby@mindspring.com (Joe Cosby)

Reverend DJ Epoch <nunyabiz@noway.com> hunched over a computer, typing
feverishly;
thunder crashed, Reverend DJ Epoch <nunyabiz@noway.com> laughed madly,
then wrote:

>One of my all-time favorites is a sign over a garage in downtown
>Atlanta...
>
>"S & M Clutch and Brake"
>
>If they're still there I'm gonna have to get a pic to post to a.b.s

There used to be this building, next to a movie theatre I go to, and
there is a Marines recruiting office above one of those "payday loans"
places.

From the side, they have their signs right over each other, so it was:

"The MARINES"
"New! Extended hours!"

Which I think is a nice idea if you are needing to invade a third
world country after regular business hours.

--
Joe Cosby
http://joecosby.home.mindspring.com

In the time of chimpanzees I was a monkey butane in my veins and I'm out to get the junky
- Beck

Sig by Kookie Jar 5.98d http://go.to/generalfrenetics/

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Original file name: Re- Dear Subgenius Traffi.txt - converted on Monday, 21 July 2003, 13:48