Dear Subgenius Astrophysics Dept:

From: fenian <fenian@start.ca>
Date: Thu, Aug 12, 2004

What happens if you pick one direction, and proceed to travel in a
straight line until you reach the edge of the universe? Assume you are
travelling faster than the expansion (if it is in fact expanding) rate
of the universe.

Thank you.

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From: Zapanas <http://joecosby.com/code/mail.pl>

I just got dizzy, that's all.

--
Zapanas
Grand Master of the Satanic Conspiracy

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From: "nu-monet v7.0" <nothing@succeeds.com>

Well, there are several theories. If you go for
Einstein's "curved space" concept (the grid that
is like a rubber sheet with planets and stars
making dents in it), then, as you headed in a
straight line for the edge of the universe, you
would gradually curve back around the edge of the
universe until you arrived at your point of origin.

Your line would be straight, but it would
paradoxically form a circle. You would never
reach the true "edge" of the universe.

However, more recent theories suggest entirely
different outcomes. For example, only about 12%
of the universe can be "accounted for", as far as
known energy and matter. The rest strongly influences
that 12%, but we haven't been able to figure out what
it is yet. It's called "dark matter", and theories
about as to what it is and where it is hiding, but
no real proof yet.

And it's awful hard to guess what the universe is
doing when you can't see 88 or so percent of it.
For example, it may not have a shape like what we
think it does, so as you head to the edge you might
do all sorts of things: from hitting a "wall", to
twisting and turning, or even doubling back on
yourself--and yet still keeping to a straight line.

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From: glassgnost <glassgnost@nospam.sbcglobal.net>

nu-monet v7.0 wrote:
> For example, it may not have a shape like what we
> think it does, so as you head to the edge you might
> do all sorts of things: from hitting a "wall", to

So remember: Wear a helmet.

--
the Mystical RevvedErrand Doktor glassnost

God.

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From: Cardinal Vertigo <vertigo@alexandria.cc>

fenian wrote:
[snip]
> Assume you are
> travelling faster than the expansion (if it is in fact expanding) rate
> of the universe.
[snip]

Can't be done. Not worth thinking about.

If you want to anyway, go get a top-class advanced theoretical physics
education first, or you'll waste all your time coming up with shit
people have already come up with.

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From: glassgnost <glassgnost@nospam.sbcglobal.net>

fenian wrote:
> travelling faster than the expansion (if it is in fact expanding) rate

FWIW, I suspect that Gravity feels like Acceleration because it IS
acceleration. Picture the "rasin bread" model of expansion with bloating
rasins...

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From: "Rev. Lance Randy" <stimpyjazz@hotmail.com>

"fenian" <fenian@start.ca> wrote:
> What happens if you pick one direction, and proceed to travel in a
> straight line until you reach the edge of the universe? Assume you are
> travelling faster than the expansion (if it is in fact expanding) rate
> of the universe.

> Thank you.

You can bet that at the end of the universe, you will find a McDonalds. And
they will be out of filet o' fish.

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From: nenslo <nenslo@yahoox.com>

fenian wrote:

> What happens if you pick one direction, and proceed to travel in a
> straight line until you reach the edge of the universe? Assume you are
> travelling faster than the expansion (if it is in fact expanding) rate
> of the universe.
>
> Thank you.

I'd rather assume I am kicking your fucking ass.

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From: "Rev. Lance Randy" <stimpyjazz@hotmail.com>

I remember the first time I became aware of the concept of infinity. I
was 5 years old, and I was being babysat by a kid from across the street .
He was a 13 year old kid who showed me how to do karate kicks. Me and my
brother and him would play "Kung-Foo".We would chase him and hit him with
pillows, and he would would run, and flip around the room making karate
noises. He told me that the universe went on and on forever. I said, that
can't be possible, it has to end somewhere. So he asked me "whats at the end
then?" I figured it was a brick wall, that there had to be a huge brick wall
at the end of it. Then he asked me "whats beyond the brick wall?" I said,
more brick wall, its really thick, it just keeps going, and going
and......ummm.
I didn't get any sleep that night, my 5 year old brain was sweating, and
working overtime, ultimatly jamming up. I didn't sleep to well for a long
time after that.
The prick.

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From: simon <davidsum68@hotmail.com>

Rev. Lance Randy <stimpyjazz@hotmail.com> writes
>I remember the first time I became aware of the concept of infinity. I
>was 5 years old

I was about ten, in a maths lesson, and I remember this big hole
appearing inside of me, an inverse penetration. I thought we had numbers
for everything! Was hospitalised in 1994.

--
Rev. Smith

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From: "ghost" <ghost@ghost.net>

"You can't fool me! It's turtles all the way down!"

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From: "Rev. Ivan Stang" <stang@subgeniusNOSPUM.com>

My son, who is now grown, had a similar experience at an early age, and
he got to where he HATED even hearing the word INFINITY. As a dinosaur
freak he had an inkling of the vast gulfs of time and space as best a
person can at such an early age (if ever), and that was unsettling
enough, but the idea of NO END... he really did not like that idea. I
know how he feels.... if you REALLY let yourself think about it, it can
induce a kind of vertigo, like standing at the very edgey-edge of a
steep steep cliff... the feeling that you're about to fall.

I myself settled on the Brick Wall theory and in fact I have a 16mm
film of God explaining the Brick Wall. "Because it's gotta stop
somewhere," he says. He claims He's on the other side of the Brick
Wall.

I am not shitting you and I will post this footage of God on a.b.s.
sometime soon. When I get that DV camera I bought on eBay. Next week.
It's out-takes, a scene that was removed from my age 19 underground
movie, "Let's Visit the World of the Future." My dad played God (still
does!) and... I think it was the first time I ever saw my father really
scared, when he had to face that camera and start talking. Which was
pretty funny considering that he was dressed in a white robe, white wig
and beard, and a tinfoil halo. An Ed Wood God.

--
The SubGenius Foundation, Inc.
(4th Stangian Orthodox MegaFisTemple Lodge of the Wrath of Dobbs Yeti,
Resurrected, Rev. Ivan Stang, prop.)
PRABOB

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Original file name: Dear Subgenius Astro#192F40.txt - converted on Saturday, 25 September 2004, 02:05