Dobbstown Slushy
Correspondent:: "iDRMRSR"
Date: Thu, 23 Dec 2004 18:16:51 -0500
--------
That's exactly what this town looks like tonight. First it snowed, then it
rained, then it snowed sum more, and then froze over like some gigundo
fucking 7-11 frosty slurpy Italian Ice. The Bob Damned Snow is floating
above pools of salty water by the curbs and my garage apron looks like the
aftermath of a frozen daquiri Bukkake party.
Every where you go you get splashed and then it freezes and it's going down
to Arctic temps tonight, so it's going to freeze just like that to form some
kind of expressionistic ice sculpture which, Bob dammit, I have to drag my
ass through to work tomorrow if I don't slip and get a lemon up my rectum in
the process.
Come the Rupsture, I hope the Xists wait until it snows again and THEN they
blast Cleveland to hell, and post a video to alt.binaries.slack. Fuck
Mother Nature with a corn cob, with all the corn eaten off, dipped in brine
and Sri Racha Pepper sauce, and rolled in ground tiger whiskers and
fiberglass.
[*]
-----
Correspondent:: "Revi Shankar"
Date: Fri, 24 Dec 2004 12:26:40 -0500
--------
"iDRMRSR" wrote in message
news:jb2dneWjd8t-zFbcRVn-ug@giganews.com...
> That's exactly what this town looks like tonight. First it snowed, then
it
> rained, then it snowed sum more, and then froze over like some gigundo
> fucking 7-11 frosty slurpy Italian Ice. The Bob Damned Snow is floating
> above pools of salty water by the curbs and my garage apron looks like the
> aftermath of a frozen daquiri Bukkake party.
Oh what a day yesterday was. The snow plow actually came down the street. Of
course, it buried any cars on the curb. Then the morons that dug their cars
out piled the snow back in the street so now people have to navigate actual
snow mountians in the road. They get smooshed somewhat, but it's hell to
drive over now.
The back alley gets these ice-ruts that grow everytime someone spalshes
through them. The splashed water forms huge, well, sculptures, as you say.
They get large enough that they scrape the bottom of the car.
I actually shovelled my own walk yesterday. And I didn't die, remarkably. It
was preposterously difficult. The snow is so dense and heavy that it's as if
someone dumped 20 inches of topsoil on everything.
Correspondent:: "Rev. Ivan Stang"
Date: Sat, 25 Dec 2004 14:31:44 -0600
--------
In article , Revi Shankar
wrote:
> "iDRMRSR" wrote in message
> news:jb2dneWjd8t-zFbcRVn-ug@giganews.com...
> > That's exactly what this town looks like tonight. First it snowed, then
> it
> > rained, then it snowed sum more, and then froze over like some gigundo
> > fucking 7-11 frosty slurpy Italian Ice. The Bob Damned Snow is floating
> > above pools of salty water by the curbs and my garage apron looks like the
> > aftermath of a frozen daquiri Bukkake party.
>
> Oh what a day yesterday was. The snow plow actually came down the street. Of
> course, it buried any cars on the curb. Then the morons that dug their cars
> out piled the snow back in the street so now people have to navigate actual
> snow mountians in the road. They get smooshed somewhat, but it's hell to
> drive over now.
>
> The back alley gets these ice-ruts that grow everytime someone spalshes
> through them. The splashed water forms huge, well, sculptures, as you say.
> They get large enough that they scrape the bottom of the car.
>
> I actually shovelled my own walk yesterday. And I didn't die, remarkably. It
> was preposterously difficult. The snow is so dense and heavy that it's as if
> someone dumped 20 inches of topsoil on everything.
>
You guys will be able to appreciate this.
Right NOW I'm all comfy on my late mom's computer at the Stang Ranch in
Texas, and it's about 50 degrees outside. But getting here... it took a
LOT of Oyeh-ing.
Okay. Thursday morning I was mostly packed for this trip and we had a
friend coming to take us to the airport at 4. But I wanted to mail out
the last of the swag and Membership orders I'd gotten in. Many were
over a pound, or going overseas, and thanks to Bush Ladin you now have
to stand in line and hand those to a PO person so that they can ask you
if you're mailing bombs or drugs and you can say you aren't. We had
cleared the cars and driveway Wednesday night, but of course by
Thursday morning they were half buried again, so I decided, fuck
shovelling again, I'll just walk to the PO, like usual.
Well, they don't PLOW the SIDEWALKS so it was a strenuous walk. Mostly
on the streets. Being from Texas, though, the snow is still a novelty
to me so I really enjoyed it. And the exercise fends off the ROT.
I would have driven, though, had I known I'd be stranded in the Atlanta
airport all night.
Yes, we were among those holiday travelers that you see on the TV news,
sleeping on the floor in airports. BUT WE WERE THE LUCKY ONES!
We left Cleveland an hour late due to ice on the wings and missed our
connecting flight in Atlanta. The Delta fux told us (and everyone else
in the airport) to go to Gate A 30 for the last flight to Dallas. As we
neared that gate it became evident that over 100 people were standing
around ON STANDBY for that flight ALREADY.
Wei and I instantly turned around and starting RUNNING towards the
TICKET DESK. Behind us we heard it being announced that everyone should
go to the Delta ticket desk. Good thing we got a head start. The same
scene was being reennacted for every flight on every airline in the
Atlanta airport. When we got to the Delta ticket counter, the special
"CANCELLED FLIGHTS" area already had a TWO HOUR LINE.
That is, it took US two hours to be told we'd have to be put on standby
for a 7 am flight, and that we'd be DAMN LUCKY to get THAT.
But get this: within 15 minutes of our joining the line, at 11 pm or
so, the size of the line doubled. Within another 15 minutes it had
tripled. An hour later it was so long that even with it doubling back
and forth in this huge area, you could not see the end of it. I did a
little math and it became obvious that most of the people in that line
would still be in the line 12 hours later. Old people, young moms with
babies, drunks coming down, guys who already needed a smoke REAL BAD.
Wei and I were very glad we had acted so swiftly.
And, by gobbs, for that 7am flight to Dallas, we were stand-bys numbers
3 and 4 out of about 30, and we got on the flight.
A guy we'd talked to earlier had been on standby for a flight out,
since 6 the PREVIOUS morning.
But this did mean there was no sense in going to a hotel for the night.
We found the gate, made a bed of sorts on the floor, and konked out
like little exhausted angels on downers until 6 when the suspenseful
watch on the stand-by list began.
Like I said, if I'd have known I'd be in airplanes and airports for 16
hours, I wouldn't have WALKED to the PO through the 3 foot snowdrifts.
But once at the Stang Ranch, we snoozed half the day and all night.
Now it's Xmas day and Wei and I are fixing to go for a nice sunny walk
on the back 40 to see my brother's new GOATS.
Our cars back in Cleveland are no doubt COMPLETELY BURIED by now. And
there are probably a lot of people STILL IN LINE at the Delta ticket
counter -- engaged by now in fistfights, nervous breakdowns, screaming
matches, etc. Makes me think of human behavior in disasters,
hurricanes, war, etc. MAJOR BUMSTACIOUSNESS!
My kids made it here fine. They flew from LA with no problem. But my
daughter's boyfriend drove from Knoxville to Dallas and it took him 35
HOURS because of the wrecks on I-30 and I-40. 35 HOURS.
OH MY GOD I MUST SUDDENLY MOVE THE COMPUTER, TO MAKE ROOM FOR THE
TURKEY!
Eat drink and be merry ok ok slack slack
Correspondent:: mshotz@aol.commonkeypo (Rev. Richard Skull)
Date: 25 Dec 2004 22:25:26 GMT
--------
>But this did mean there was no sense in going to a hotel for the night.
>We found the gate, made a bed of sorts on the floor, and konked out
>like little exhausted angels on downers until 6 when the suspenseful
>watch on the stand-by list began.
I have been told by Security at Philadelphia Airport that if you get snowed in
there, only camp out past the Secuirty check points at the concourses.
In Philly, in the winter, all the local homeless wil congegate at the airport
in the cold weather, and pester the suckers who get stranded as well as
liberate any valuables that you take your eyes off for 3/10ths of a second.
But the security people won't let any past the screening points.
>Now it's Xmas day and Wei and I are fixing to go for a nice sunny walk
>on the back 40 to see my brother's new GOATS.
>
Goats are cool. My uncle had two goats named Choo-Choo and Kendle.
>there are probably a lot of people STILL IN LINE at the Delta ticket
>counter -- engaged by now in fistfights, nervous breakdowns, screaming
>matches, etc. Makes me think of human behavior in disasters,
>hurricanes, war, etc. MAJOR BUMSTACIOUSNESS!
Sounds like a place that needs, nay DEMANDS the soothing praching of STANG!
I'm surprised that you didi not take the oppurtunity to do some street
preaching. Hand out SubG pamplets, as for donations, etc.
After lack of proper sleep, hygeine, and food, many of these stranded people
needed slack more then anything else!
>My kids made it here fine. They flew from LA with no problem. But my
>daughter's boyfriend drove from Knoxville to Dallas and it took him 35
>HOURS because of the wrecks on I-30 and I-40. 35 HOURS.
When I was stationed at Ft. Hood in the winter of 1981, one of the guys in my
unit had to go home on emergancy leave after his dad had a heart attack.
I volunteered to drive him to the Austin Airport so he could catch his flight
to Chicago. One the way down it was about 38 degrees F and raining. About the
time we got past Georgetownm it had turned into a major ice storm.
Being that this was Texas, and was winter weather, all the other drivers
followed the winter driving rules that the Texas State Scholl system teaches in
Drivers Ed. Speed up and make sudden abrupt moves!
By the time we got to the Austin airport, everything was encased in about 1/16
inch of ice. Seeing I was a Yankee, I had one of those strange things called
and "ice scraper" that attracted lots of attention form the locals. I was
offered much cash for this valued item. But seeing that I had to drive the 60
some miles back to Ft. Hood, I passed up on the chance to screw some people.
On the way back, the weather got worse and the drivers got stupider. I-35 was
so bad that after a big duely pick up wnet into a spin and almost wiped out my
little VW beetle (and me with it), I actually drove accross the grass median
and drove back to US 190 on the service roads were there was no traffic.
I won't bother telling you about my little winter time adventure in Augusta, GA
while at Ft. Gordon!
Lets just say that snow, ice and people who live south of the mason-dixon line
just don;t mix.
MSHOTZ: The Post Post Modern Man
"War hath no Fury like a non-combatants"
Charles E. Montague
Correspondent:: "Rev. Ivan Stang"
Date: Sat, 25 Dec 2004 23:22:09 -0600
--------
In article <20041225172526.08355.00002460@mb-m04.aol.com>, Rev. Richard
Skull wrote:
> >But this did mean there was no sense in going to a hotel for the night.
> >We found the gate, made a bed of sorts on the floor, and konked out
> >like little exhausted angels on downers until 6 when the suspenseful
> >watch on the stand-by list began.
>
> I have been told by Security at Philadelphia Airport that if you get snowed in
> there, only camp out past the Secuirty check points at the concourses.
>
> In Philly, in the winter, all the local homeless wil congegate at the airport
> in the cold weather, and pester the suckers who get stranded as well as
> liberate any valuables that you take your eyes off for 3/10ths of a second.
Yes, in Atlanta there were hordes of people snoring and lurking in the
main terminal area (which boasts a great Yuangtsesaurus (sp?) skeleton
replica). We went back through security to the near-deserted concourse
where our gate was. It was a lot quieter back there, plus we could
watch the stand-by display screen for our flight without getting up
from our "bed."
>
> But the security people won't let any past the screening points.
>
> >Now it's Xmas day and Wei and I are fixing to go for a nice sunny walk
> >on the back 40 to see my brother's new GOATS.
> >
>
> Goats are cool. My uncle had two goats named Choo-Choo and Kendle.
Goats are STUPID and REALLY SMELLY. One of my brother's goats laid
itself down behind the wheels of his pickup when he wasn't looking, and
when he backed out he ran right over it. Heard a thump and then saw
this goat staggering around in a dazed manner but otherwise appearing
to be unhurt.
But now it WALKS SIDEWAYS and always has its head turned slightly to
one side.
That didn't stop this goat from attempting to sleep under the truck's
tires AGAIN.
>
> >there are probably a lot of people STILL IN LINE at the Delta ticket
> >counter -- engaged by now in fistfights, nervous breakdowns, screaming
> >matches, etc. Makes me think of human behavior in disasters,
> >hurricanes, war, etc. MAJOR BUMSTACIOUSNESS!
>
> Sounds like a place that needs, nay DEMANDS the soothing praching of STANG!
Soothing???
>
> I'm surprised that you didi not take the oppurtunity to do some street
> preaching. Hand out SubG pamplets, as for donations, etc.
Let the OTHER religions give their shit away free -- you get what you
pay for.
>
> After lack of proper sleep, hygeine, and food, many of these stranded people
> needed slack more then anything else!
Yeah and some hippie yammering about a goofy UFO cult would be JUST
EXACTLY THEIR IDEA OF SLACK, I'm SURE.
Jesus is pretty good at that, though. He was instrumental in keeping a
very angry crowd from getting uglier outside a Survival Research labs
show in Austin. But then, in that white robe and with that long hair
and beard (which He no longer has, since He's now employed by Satan),
He could pull it off. Rednecks and Christians who might otherwise have
kicked his ass hesitated to do so because, well, in this case they
probably figured He JUST MIGHT BE JESUS FOR REAL.
>
> >My kids made it here fine. They flew from LA with no problem. But my
> >daughter's boyfriend drove from Knoxville to Dallas and it took him 35
> >HOURS because of the wrecks on I-30 and I-40. 35 HOURS.
>
> When I was stationed at Ft. Hood in the winter of 1981, one of the guys in my
> unit had to go home on emergancy leave after his dad had a heart attack.
>
> I volunteered to drive him to the Austin Airport so he could catch his flight
> to Chicago. One the way down it was about 38 degrees F and raining. About the
> time we got past Georgetownm it had turned into a major ice storm.
>
> Being that this was Texas, and was winter weather, all the other drivers
> followed the winter driving rules that the Texas State Scholl system teaches
> in
> Drivers Ed. Speed up and make sudden abrupt moves!
That's not an exaggerration but is literally true of most Texans when
ice happens.
I vividly remember that ice storm. It was a major disaster for many
North Texans. Philo had no heat for 7 days. I stayed warm because I
lived in such a ratty house we had those gas heaters with ceramic
elements that require no electricity to operate, but are merely
dangerous as hell.
>
> By the time we got to the Austin airport, everything was encased in about 1/16
> inch of ice. Seeing I was a Yankee, I had one of those strange things called
> and "ice scraper" that attracted lots of attention form the locals. I was
> offered much cash for this valued item. But seeing that I had to drive the 60
> some miles back to Ft. Hood, I passed up on the chance to screw some people.
>
> On the way back, the weather got worse and the drivers got stupider. I-35 was
> so bad that after a big duely pick up wnet into a spin and almost wiped out my
> little VW beetle (and me with it), I actually drove accross the grass median
> and drove back to US 190 on the service roads were there was no traffic.
>
> I won't bother telling you about my little winter time adventure in Augusta,
> GA
> while at Ft. Gordon!
>
> Lets just say that snow, ice and people who live south of the mason-dixon line
> just don;t mix.
Well, they mix about every ten years, and you saw what happens. There
was a King of the Hill episode which addressed this. Bobbie said,
"Dayd, there's WAT STUFF falleen outa the SKAH!" And all the Texans
immediately panic, jump into their cars and start driving into each
other.
I spent two winters in South Dakota about 120 years ago so I know how
to drive in the stuff somewhat. I have run my vehicle into a snowbank
more than once though. Good thing snow is so SOFT!
Correspondent:: mshotz@aol.commonkeypo (Rev. Richard Skull)
Date: 26 Dec 2004 22:31:33 GMT
--------
>I vividly remember that ice storm. It was a major disaster for many
>North Texans. Philo had no heat for 7 days. I stayed warm because I
>lived in such a ratty house we had those gas heaters with ceramic
>elements that require no electricity to operate, but are merely
>dangerous as hell.
IN the winter of 1995, we had a major ice storm in the Northeast. My sister had
no power for 8 days.
She stayed alive by using my old Kerosene Heater to heat her place, I would
drive down with several jugs of water every day from my place to they would
have water for cooking and basic hygene (they had a well), she used a Coleman
stoved to cook. She said it was like camping for 6 days with driving any
wheres.
I remeber that one of the Sergeants in my unit rented a house in Killen, TX
that had one of those heaters, as well as one of the older open flame ones as
well. His Great Dane got a serious burn on her tail from them. One of the
locals said that every year at least one child in the Killena/Belton/Temple
area was seriously burned by them. Of course none of the land lord would
replace them with something safer.
MSHOTZ: The Post Post Modern Man
"War hath no Fury like a non-combatants"
Charles E. Montague
Correspondent:: mshotz@aol.commonkeypo (Rev. Richard Skull)
Date: 25 Dec 2004 22:27:22 GMT
--------
>Right NOW I'm all comfy on my late mom's computer at the Stang Ranch in
>Texas, and it's about 50 degrees outside. But getting here... it took a
>LOT of Oyeh-ing.
I was not aware that your mom has taken up a position in the escape vessles.
My condolances to your, your dad, siblings, etc.
MSHOTZ: The Post Post Modern Man
"War hath no Fury like a non-combatants"
Charles E. Montague
Correspondent:: "Rev. Ivan Stang"
Date: Sun, 26 Dec 2004 21:42:09 -0600
--------
In article <20041225172722.08355.00002461@mb-m04.aol.com>, Rev. Richard
Skull wrote:
> >Right NOW I'm all comfy on my late mom's computer at the Stang Ranch in
> >Texas, and it's about 50 degrees outside. But getting here... it took a
> >LOT of Oyeh-ing.
>
> I was not aware that your mom has taken up a position in the escape vessles.
>
> My condolances to your, your dad, siblings, etc.
>
Thanks... it was long expected, happened last August. Luckily my dad is
still in real good shape.
I remember your rant at X-Day about losing your dad.
Correspondent:: Zapanaz
Date: Sat, 25 Dec 2004 23:21:02 -0800
--------
On Sat, 25 Dec 2004 14:31:44 -0600, "Rev. Ivan Stang"
wrote:
>I did a
>little math and it became obvious that most of the people in that line
>would still be in the line 12 hours later. Old people, young moms with
>babies, drunks coming down, guys who already needed a smoke REAL BAD.
>
Airports are the one time I really HATE being a smoker.
I have a flight I have to take several times a year which basically
amounts to 10 hours inside airports or planes ... after three hours or
so it is starting to get bad.
After that I can kind of shut it out of my mind, and as long as I
don't think about it I am OK.
But then when I have gotten off the last flight, and I am outside the
baggage claim area, I get that first shot of nicoheroin after 10
hours. My whole brain fills with white light, and angels sing.
>Wei and I were very glad we had acted so swiftly.
--
Zapanaz
International Satanic Conspiracy
Customer Support Specialist
http://joecosby.com/
I remember way back in Grade 8 Geography where many people
had difficulty trying to understand why all of the rivers didn't flow
towards the bottom of the page.
- Greg Wotton
Correspondent:: "Rev. Ivan Stang"
Date: Sun, 26 Dec 2004 21:39:23 -0600
--------
In article <8ipss050dv8nog0f9kr7042va4qje6rv9r@4ax.com>, Zapanaz wrote:
> On Sat, 25 Dec 2004 14:31:44 -0600, "Rev. Ivan Stang"
> wrote:
>
> >I did a
> >little math and it became obvious that most of the people in that line
> >would still be in the line 12 hours later. Old people, young moms with
> >babies, drunks coming down, guys who already needed a smoke REAL BAD.
> >
>
> Airports are the one time I really HATE being a smoker.
>
> I have a flight I have to take several times a year which basically
> amounts to 10 hours inside airports or planes ... after three hours or
> so it is starting to get bad.
>
> After that I can kind of shut it out of my mind, and as long as I
> don't think about it I am OK.
>
> But then when I have gotten off the last flight, and I am outside the
> baggage claim area, I get that first shot of nicoheroin after 10
> hours. My whole brain fills with white light, and angels sing.
>
I have noticed that these days, smokers are the ones who look FIT, for
the simple reason that they're outdoors in the sun and fresh air a lot
more than most other people are.
While enjoying those 16 hours in airplanes and airports, I was REAL
DAMN GLAD I had spent that 6 months in 1997 QUITTING.
Correspondent:: Rev DJ Epoch
Date: 27 Dec 2004 13:38:40 GMT
--------
"Rev. Ivan Stang" wrote in
news:251220041431440877%stang@subNOSPUMgenius.com:
> In article , Revi Shankar
> wrote:
>
>> "iDRMRSR" wrote in message
>> news:jb2dneWjd8t-zFbcRVn-ug@giganews.com...
>> > That's exactly what this town looks like tonight. First it snowed,
>> > then
>> it
>> > rained, then it snowed sum more, and then froze over like some
>> > gigundo fucking 7-11 frosty slurpy Italian Ice. The Bob Damned Snow
>> > is floating above pools of salty water by the curbs and my garage
>> > apron looks like the aftermath of a frozen daquiri Bukkake party.
>>
>> Oh what a day yesterday was. The snow plow actually came down the
>> street. Of course, it buried any cars on the curb. Then the morons that
>> dug their cars out piled the snow back in the street so now people have
>> to navigate actual snow mountians in the road. They get smooshed
>> somewhat, but it's hell to drive over now.
>>
>> The back alley gets these ice-ruts that grow everytime someone spalshes
>> through them. The splashed water forms huge, well, sculptures, as you
>> say. They get large enough that they scrape the bottom of the car.
>>
>> I actually shovelled my own walk yesterday. And I didn't die,
>> remarkably. It was preposterously difficult. The snow is so dense and
>> heavy that it's as if someone dumped 20 inches of topsoil on
>> everything.
>>
>
> You guys will be able to appreciate this.
>
> Right NOW I'm all comfy on my late mom's computer at the Stang Ranch in
> Texas, and it's about 50 degrees outside. But getting here... it took a
> LOT of Oyeh-ing.
>
> Okay. Thursday morning I was mostly packed for this trip and we had a
> friend coming to take us to the airport at 4. But I wanted to mail out
> the last of the swag and Membership orders I'd gotten in. Many were
> over a pound, or going overseas, and thanks to Bush Ladin you now have
> to stand in line and hand those to a PO person so that they can ask you
> if you're mailing bombs or drugs and you can say you aren't. We had
> cleared the cars and driveway Wednesday night, but of course by
> Thursday morning they were half buried again, so I decided, fuck
> shovelling again, I'll just walk to the PO, like usual.
>
> Well, they don't PLOW the SIDEWALKS so it was a strenuous walk. Mostly
> on the streets. Being from Texas, though, the snow is still a novelty
> to me so I really enjoyed it. And the exercise fends off the ROT.
>
> I would have driven, though, had I known I'd be stranded in the Atlanta
> airport all night.
>
> Yes, we were among those holiday travelers that you see on the TV news,
> sleeping on the floor in airports. BUT WE WERE THE LUCKY ONES!
>
> We left Cleveland an hour late due to ice on the wings and missed our
> connecting flight in Atlanta. The Delta fux told us (and everyone else
> in the airport) to go to Gate A 30 for the last flight to Dallas. As we
> neared that gate it became evident that over 100 people were standing
> around ON STANDBY for that flight ALREADY.
>
> Wei and I instantly turned around and starting RUNNING towards the
> TICKET DESK. Behind us we heard it being announced that everyone should
> go to the Delta ticket desk. Good thing we got a head start. The same
> scene was being reennacted for every flight on every airline in the
> Atlanta airport. When we got to the Delta ticket counter, the special
> "CANCELLED FLIGHTS" area already had a TWO HOUR LINE.
>
> That is, it took US two hours to be told we'd have to be put on standby
> for a 7 am flight, and that we'd be DAMN LUCKY to get THAT.
>
> But get this: within 15 minutes of our joining the line, at 11 pm or
> so, the size of the line doubled. Within another 15 minutes it had
> tripled. An hour later it was so long that even with it doubling back
> and forth in this huge area, you could not see the end of it. I did a
> little math and it became obvious that most of the people in that line
> would still be in the line 12 hours later. Old people, young moms with
> babies, drunks coming down, guys who already needed a smoke REAL BAD.
>
> Wei and I were very glad we had acted so swiftly.
>
> And, by gobbs, for that 7am flight to Dallas, we were stand-bys numbers
> 3 and 4 out of about 30, and we got on the flight.
>
> A guy we'd talked to earlier had been on standby for a flight out,
> since 6 the PREVIOUS morning.
>
> But this did mean there was no sense in going to a hotel for the night.
> We found the gate, made a bed of sorts on the floor, and konked out
> like little exhausted angels on downers until 6 when the suspenseful
> watch on the stand-by list began.
>
> Like I said, if I'd have known I'd be in airplanes and airports for 16
> hours, I wouldn't have WALKED to the PO through the 3 foot snowdrifts.
>
> But once at the Stang Ranch, we snoozed half the day and all night.
>
> Now it's Xmas day and Wei and I are fixing to go for a nice sunny walk
> on the back 40 to see my brother's new GOATS.
>
> Our cars back in Cleveland are no doubt COMPLETELY BURIED by now. And
> there are probably a lot of people STILL IN LINE at the Delta ticket
> counter -- engaged by now in fistfights, nervous breakdowns, screaming
> matches, etc. Makes me think of human behavior in disasters,
> hurricanes, war, etc. MAJOR BUMSTACIOUSNESS!
>
> My kids made it here fine. They flew from LA with no problem. But my
> daughter's boyfriend drove from Knoxville to Dallas and it took him 35
> HOURS because of the wrecks on I-30 and I-40. 35 HOURS.
>
> OH MY GOD I MUST SUDDENLY MOVE THE COMPUTER, TO MAKE ROOM FOR THE
> TURKEY!
>
> Eat drink and be merry ok ok slack slack
By gobbs, man. Next time you're on a merry holiday escape-ade through
Atlanta airport, take my number with you! I could have picked you both up
and offered you comfort in SlackCastle Epoch for the night and gotten you
back at the airport in plenty of time to make the flight.
I wouldn't wish an overnight stay in ATL on anyone with the possible
exception of purple or Rumsfeld. I'm just damned glad you guys arrived at
Stang Ranch safe and in one piece. (Well, two, as you and Wei ARE separate
entities.) Anyhow, the offer stands should you find yourselves in such a
dire predicament in the future.
Peace, slack and save travails.
--
The Church of Our Lady of Prepetual Motion
Cathedral, Carwash and Dancehall- Home of the Traci Lords Memorial Brothel
Rev. DJ Epoch - proprietor and janitor
Divine Southern Redneck Yeti Clench Recruitment site: http://revdjepoch.COM
"If you want my delusions, you'll have to pry them from my cold,
dead hippocampus with a grapefruit spoon."
-- HellPope Huey