Holiday peculiarities?
Correspondent:: "fenian d'illudium q-36, Rlari."
Date: Thu, 30 Dec 2004 23:57:11 -0500
--------
Of course not everyone saw Christmas at the solstice time. There's
Kwanzaa, and Chanukkah, and whathaveu. Any other children of the
Surgeon Cult of our Lady of Fast Food here? You may find this little
memoir quite nostalgic...
We marked Grimace Time at the solstice when I was child. My parents
were among the Surgeon Cult. Looking back, it was a strange ritual,
when I consider what my friends did. But, it shaped me, and I am who
am I because of it. I only wish I could find a lady friend with steady
hands, who is able and willing to cut me open, and close me up again
after six hours. Sigh. My pappy used to ever so mildly sedate me and
my brothers, and actually cut us open, ventrally, from throat to
belly, and leave us that way through the dim light of Grimace. My
mammy used to position my head just so, so that after pappy unzipped
my body, I could lay there in my paralysis, and watch my exposed lungs
expand and collapse...expand and collapse...and my heart, it would go
pathum, pathum. It was nice to see what I always heard. And my
stomach, heart of me belly, was such a random thing, contracting and
rumbling at no real discernable interval. After we got zipped back up,
we were always ready to go back to school after the holidays, which
were used wisely, to convalesce and grow back lost blood. Ahh, good
times.
Correspondent:: "Rev. 11D Meow!"
Date: Thu, 30 Dec 2004 21:31:36 -0800
--------
I've seen many much mo' beddah Cheech & Chong 'films'.
If you're not dead, yet...
How Can You Re-Appear?
FUCK IT, ASK BOB DOBBS!
I sure as fuck don't know...
"fenian d'illudium q-36, Rlari." wrote in message
news:dsm9t0l39holi1g2qgosjni6md7g3r2t0q@4ax.com...
> Of course not everyone saw Christmas at the solstice time. There's
> Kwanzaa, and Chanukkah, and whathaveu. Any other children of the
> Surgeon Cult of our Lady of Fast Food here? You may find this little
> memoir quite nostalgic...
>
> We marked Grimace Time at the solstice when I was child. My parents
> were among the Surgeon Cult. Looking back, it was a strange ritual,
> when I consider what my friends did. But, it shaped me, and I am who
> am I because of it. I only wish I could find a lady friend with steady
> hands, who is able and willing to cut me open, and close me up again
> after six hours. Sigh. My pappy used to ever so mildly sedate me and
> my brothers, and actually cut us open, ventrally, from throat to
> belly, and leave us that way through the dim light of Grimace. My
> mammy used to position my head just so, so that after pappy unzipped
> my body, I could lay there in my paralysis, and watch my exposed lungs
> expand and collapse...expand and collapse...and my heart, it would go
> pathum, pathum. It was nice to see what I always heard. And my
> stomach, heart of me belly, was such a random thing, contracting and
> rumbling at no real discernable interval. After we got zipped back up,
> we were always ready to go back to school after the holidays, which
> were used wisely, to convalesce and grow back lost blood. Ahh, good
> times.
Correspondent:: "Cardinal Pseudomalachite IVI"
Date: Fri, 31 Dec 2004 10:34:26 -0500
--------
"fenian d'illudium q-36, Rlari." wrote in message
news:dsm9t0l39holi1g2qgosjni6md7g3r2t0q@4ax.com...
> I only wish I could find a lady friend with steady
> hands, who is able and willing to cut me open, and close me up again
> after six hours. Sigh.
When I was a-growing from a smaller spurt our
family had the classic 'crazy auntie'. She would
insist her kids get 2 enema's per year up thru
age 12. I never really understood this as most
GI problems start to hit around age 18 when the
effects of junk food begin in earnest. (I can only
guess that today, with the crap kids eat and 2 out
of 8 kids being clinically obese, this may actually
be a good idea) Still the horror of having a prod
with holes in it stuck up your bung and the water bottle
draining it's douche into your venusian portal was
downright frightening. Still, she did it to herself and
her kids, and we all knew about it. (note: This was in the
60's long before this kind of stuff would have got auntie
a visit from the local child protection agency people like
in today) Well, the old bitch actually lived to be 98
before dying peacefully in her bed. Her #1 son lived to
be 39 before succumbing HIV no doubt from a lifestyle
of leather, watersports and wearing hankies in his
back pockets at the local other "bar". Son #2 is still
alive and is a very succe$$full plastic surgeon in Ca.
Dad laft mom in 73 for some bimbo and was never heard
from again.
Correspondent:: nikolai kingsley
Date: Sat, 01 Jan 2005 06:56:34 +1100
--------
> Dad laft mom in 73 for some bimbo and was never heard
> from again.
for some reason this makes me think of Tom Waits.
Correspondent:: "Revi Shankar"
Date: Fri, 31 Dec 2004 15:44:12 -0500
--------
> Dad laft mom in 73 for some bimbo and was never heard
> from again.
Smartest one of the bunch.
Correspondent:: HellPope Huey
Date: Fri, 31 Dec 2004 23:03:54 GMT
--------
In article <16a61$41d5737f$d1cc413c$14858@snip.allthenewsgroups.com>,
"Cardinal Pseudomalachite IVI"
wrote:
> When I was a-growing from a smaller spurt our
> family had the classic 'crazy auntie'. She would
> insist her kids get 2 enema's per year up thru
> age 12. I never really understood this as most
> GI problems start to hit around age 18 when the
> effects of junk food begin in earnest. (I can only
> guess that today, with the crap kids eat and 2 out
> of 8 kids being clinically obese, this may actually
> be a good idea) Still the horror of having a prod
> with holes in it stuck up your bung and the water bottle
> draining it's douche into your venusian portal was
> downright frightening.
It takes on a whole new tone if you fill the bag with PGA. Yes, when
you mix anal penetration, extreme intoxication, staggering, barfing and
childhood, you're really primed for a career in public service.
--
HellPope Huey
Inventor of Dr. Satori's
Last-Ditch Baby Knockout Drops
For Shattered Parents
"I dreamed I tore all the skin off my face
and was somebody else underneath."
"You have problems."
"I'm aware of that."
- "The Shadow"
"I'm not going to put you away.
You're not a ghost... I see you."
- "Judging Amy"