Important Notice
Correspondent:: "iDRMRSR"
Date: Wed, 29 Dec 2004 22:48:58 -0500
--------
Due to the tsunami, the offshore technical support staff is currently
unavailable.
We therefore ask you to please mark the positions and colors of any blinking
or steady lights on your equipment, then power everything down. Leave the
power off for at least two minutes by stopwatch.
Bring the power back on and note any changes in the lights carefully. If
your equipment still is experiencing the same problems, check that all
cables are properly connected, and repeat the procedure.
If this does not correct the problem, please repeat the procedure. Continue
to repeat the procedure until your warranty has expired.
Thank you, and please complete our survey below:
I FIND THAT TECHNICAL SUPPORT HAS HELPED ME:
o A little
o A lot
[*]
-----
Correspondent:: HellPope Huey
Date: Thu, 30 Dec 2004 16:39:54 GMT
--------
In article ,
"iDRMRSR" wrote:
> Due to the tsunami, the offshore technical support staff is currently
> unavailable.
> We therefore ask you to please mark the positions and colors of any blinking
> or steady lights on your equipment, then power everything down. Leave the
> power off for at least two minutes by stopwatch.
> Bring the power back on and note any changes in the lights carefully. If
> your equipment still is experiencing the same problems, check that all
> cables are properly connected, and repeat the procedure.
> If this does not correct the problem, please repeat the procedure. Continue
> to repeat the procedure until your warranty has expired.
> Thank you, and please complete our survey below:
> I FIND THAT TECHNICAL SUPPORT HAS HELPED ME:
> o A little
> o A lot
It would be a rich jest if at least 25% more tech desk staffers began
speaking actual, intelligible English again because of this event.
--
HellPope Huey
The sleep of reason begets bupkiss, these days
A professional politician
is a professionally dishonorable man.
In order to get anywhere near high office,
he has to make so many compromises
and submit to so many humiliations
that he becomes indistinguishable
from a streetwalker.
- H. L. Mencken
"If you can make a million dollars eating a rat,
you can make TWO million PASSING one."
- Super Dave Osborne
Correspondent:: SubGenius Spice
Date: Fri, 31 Dec 2004 06:40:09 GMT
--------
In alt.slack, HellPope Huey was all like...
:: In article ,
:: "iDRMRSR" wrote:
::
:: > Due to the tsunami, the offshore technical support staff is currently
:: > unavailable.
:: > We therefore ask you to please mark the positions and colors of any blinking
:: > or steady lights on your equipment, then power everything down. Leave the
:: > power off for at least two minutes by stopwatch.
:: > Bring the power back on and note any changes in the lights carefully. If
:: > your equipment still is experiencing the same problems, check that all
:: > cables are properly connected, and repeat the procedure.
:: > If this does not correct the problem, please repeat the procedure. Continue
:: > to repeat the procedure until your warranty has expired.
:: > Thank you, and please complete our survey below:
:: > I FIND THAT TECHNICAL SUPPORT HAS HELPED ME:
:: > o A little
:: > o A lot
::
:: It would be a rich jest if at least 25% more tech desk staffers began
:: speaking actual, intelligible English again because of this event.
naw.
http://sg.news.yahoo.com/041230/1/3pk75.html
First tsunami alert lost in Indian bureaucracy
India's tangled bureaucracy bungled the first alerts on the tsunami
strike losing precious time which could have saved lives, newspapers
have reported.
India's air force was warned that a remote base on Car Nicobar island
had been flooded well before the giant waves hit the mainland coast
hundreds of kilometres away on Sunday morning, the Indian Express said.
"At 7:30 am (0200 GMT) we were informed .... about a massive earthquake
near Andamans and Nicobar," air force chief S. Krishnaswamy told the
daily. "But communications links went down" with the islands.
"The last message from Car Nicobar base was that the island is sinking
and there is water all over."
At 8:15 am, the air chief says he asked an assistant to alert the
defence ministry.
On the civilian side, totally disconnected from the military, the Indian
Meteorological Department had sent a warning fax out at 8:54 am -- but
it went to the former science minister Murli Manohar Joshi, and not the
incumbent Kapil Sibal. The government changed last May.
Unaware of the mistake, the department then sent another fax to the Home
Ministry's disaster control room, at 9:41 am.
At 10:30 (0500 GMT), the control room informed the cabinet secretariat.
Thousands were already dead along India's devastated southeastern
coastline.
The Crisis Management Group, India's main emergency response body,
finally met at one pm.
The country's top science and technology official told The Times of
India that his department learnt of the tsunami strike from the
television.
V.S. Ramamurthy, secretary at the department, said they had "no clue".
The undersea earthquake hit off Indonesia's Sumatra at 6:29 am, sending
killer tsunamis racing across the Indian Ocean.
Although Indian scientists monitored the quake, because it was outside
the country, they just relaxed, the Times said. That had been "the first
mistake", Ramamurthy said.
India will now install systems to detect tsunamis at the cost of more
than 27 million dollars, Sibal said Wednesday.
An international expert told the Express that India had turned a deaf
ear to repeated warnings it needed a tidal wave alert system similar to
that used by many countries because of the costs.
Nearly 11,000 people died in India and thousands are still unaccounted
for, particularly on the Andaman and Nicobar islands where
communications facilities are poor or non-existent.
Correspondent:: "The Rev. Dr. Lt. Chaos Israel"
Date: 31 Dec 2004 04:32:14 -0800
--------
SubGenius Spice wrote:
> In alt.slack, HellPope Huey was all like...
>
> :: It would be a rich jest if at least 25% more tech desk staffers
began
> :: speaking actual, intelligible English again because of this event.
>
> naw.
>
> http://sg.news.yahoo.com/041230/1/3pk75.html
>
> First tsunami alert lost in Indian bureaucracy
>
Sideways prediction, or something:
If the earthquake were off Bermuda, rather than Sumatra, the same sorts
of bureaucratic fuck-ups would have led to the same loss of life.
But of course, it would have mattered more, because more of the
casualties would have been Americans....
--
C.
Correspondent:: Zapanaz
Date: Fri, 31 Dec 2004 08:54:18 -0800
--------
On Fri, 31 Dec 2004 06:40:09 GMT, SubGenius Spice
wrote:
>First tsunami alert lost in Indian bureaucracy
>
>India's tangled bureaucracy bungled the first alerts on the tsunami
>strike losing precious time which could have saved lives, newspapers
>have reported.
bwahahahahahahahahahaha
yeah I have tried to call customer service outsourced to india too
"Good evening, Earthquake alert center, may I assist you?"
"There's been an 8.9 earthquake and a massive tidal wave is headed
your way, for the love of decency we have to start evacuation now or
hundreds of thousands could die"
"And what operating system are you using, sir?"
"WHAT?"
"What operating system of computer are you using sir? Windows 95, 98,
2000, or XP?"
"YOU AREN'T LISTENING, MOTHERFUCKER, MY COMPUTER DOESN'T ENTER INTO
THIS IN ANY WAY, SHAPE, OR FORM!"
"Have you tried restarting the computer, sir?"
"PEOPLE ARE GOING TO DIE, YOU IDIOT WOG PIECE OF SHIT! FOR CHRIST'S
FUCKING SAKE, PUT ME IN TOUCH WITH SOMEBODY WHO ISN'T A FUCKING
IDIOT!"
"Certainly sir, let me connect you with my supervisor"
(click ... buzz ... whirrr ...)
"
(different voice)
"Good evening, Earthquake alert center, may I assist you? What
operating system are you using?"
BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA
so I'm not human. fuck it. that's funny.
--
Zapanaz
International Satanic Conspiracy
Customer Support Specialist
http://joecosby.com/
Have u herd that grate pothead joke: "What did the Easter Pig
bring u for Christmess?
- Dryad