Promise me one thing.

Correspondent:: nenslo
Date: Thu, 23 Dec 2004 18:50:55 -0800

--------
When I die, don't go on alt.slack of all places posting some mopey crap
about what a swell guy I really was in spite of my "rough edges" or
"harsh exterior" or whatever other way saps try to ameliorate others'
blatant assholism.

May we all burn in hell.

Correspondent:: drdark@37.com
Date: 23 Dec 2004 18:53:09 -0800

--------

nenslo wrote:
> whatever other way saps try to ameliorate others'
> blatant assholism.
>
Is it OK if it's only latent assholism?

Correspondent:: König Prüß, GfbAEV
Date: Fri, 24 Dec 2004 03:03:49 GMT

Correspondent:: HdMrs. Salacia the Overseer
Date: Thu, 23 Dec 2004 21:05:18 -0600

Correspondent:: phy
Date: Fri, 24 Dec 2004 03:13:24 GMT

--------
nenslo wrote in news:41CB840D.8565AF42@yahoox.com:

> When I die, don't go on alt.slack of all places posting some mopey crap
> about what a swell guy I really was in spite of my "rough edges" or
> "harsh exterior" or whatever other way saps try to ameliorate others'
> blatant assholism.
>
> May we all burn in hell.

I won't do that. I will shit on your grave, unless you are not really my
ex-mother-in-law. If that is the case, I will probably just say "nenslo
who?".

-phy (or I will use the occasion to get drunk as usual)

Correspondent:: Zapanaz
Date: Thu, 23 Dec 2004 19:34:29 -0800

--------
On Thu, 23 Dec 2004 18:50:55 -0800, nenslo wrote:

>When I die, don't go on alt.slack of all places posting some mopey crap
>about what a swell guy I really was in spite of my "rough edges" or
>"harsh exterior" or whatever other way saps try to ameliorate others'
>blatant assholism.
>
>May we all burn in hell.

http://www.toxin.org/cgi-bin/hugs.cgi?HUGS=yes&hug=Nenslo

--
Zapanaz
International Satanic Conspiracy
Customer Support Specialist
http://joecosby.com/
"I don't practice what I preach because I'm not the kind of
person I'm preaching to."
"Bob"

Correspondent:: "Paul Casino"
Date: 23 Dec 2004 19:42:03 -0800

--------
Nenslo,

I've been a practicing SubGenius since 1997 or so, and I've been
reading your posts on alt.slack for about a year now. Knowing what I
know about you, and the true DEPTHS to which your mean streak runs, I
don't think ANY of us will be posting anything like that upon
announcement of your death. Allow me to present a hypothetical scenario
of your own death, as would appear on alt.slack:

REV. STANG WROTE

Hey. Nenslo's fucking dead. He was standing in line at the local
Wal-Mart and the cashier had to call in a price check on a bag of dog
food that the customer didn't have enough money to pay for as it turned
out. Nenslo in turn snapped into what the local papers called "a
primal, animalistic rage". It seemed that his anger transcened this
mortal flesh, and he suddenly attained the ability to fire beams of
pure hate and spite from his eyes, killing seven people and one seeing
eye dog before his ire grew to such a level that his frail physical
form could no longer contain his emotive energy, and his cranium
exploded in an orgy of blood and fire, leveling a ten block radius.
Just thought you might like to know.

REV CHAIN SMERKER WROTE

Good. I hated that cock master from day one.

HDMRS. SALACIA THE OVERSEER WROTE

Nenslo died? Hunh. My shoes have been all fucked up for like a day and
a half.

PURPLE WROTE:

(nobody cares what he has to say. Why even act like they'd read it?
Fucking hack Dobbs...)

ZAPANAZ WROTE:

Yeah, fuck Nenslo. Son of a bitch still owes me money. I'm glad he's
dead. Let's have a party with cakes and hats and balloons! And a big
fuck cake shaped like a coffin with gummy worms baked in to symbolize
the maggots eating away at his decomposing corpse!

iDRMRSR WROTE:

Nenslo died. Dibs on all the stuff he had. Which is nothing. Because he
was poor. So fuck him.

HELLPOPE HUEY WROTE:

(I'm not even gonna TRY and put words in THAT guy's mouth. I don't know
where it's been.)

POLAR BEAR WROTE:

chicken pot pie and winnie the pooh? sounds like a winning combonation,
sign me up!

NU-MONET vPi (or whatever the fuck number he's up to now) WROTE:

Who the fuck was Nenslo and why should I care?

--------

So you see Nenslo, go ahead and die. Because nobody cares. Hear me?

NOBODY CARES.

Merry Fucking Christmass in the Fucking Face.

Shithead.

And Zapanaz? I ain't falling for your shite. I ain't huggin' Nenslo. My
dad said he's the leading cause of low sperm count amongst white males
ages 18-25, which I happen to be.

Correspondent:: Zapanaz
Date: Thu, 23 Dec 2004 20:16:33 -0800

--------
On 23 Dec 2004 19:42:03 -0800, "Paul Casino"
wrote:

>And Zapanaz? I ain't falling for your shite. I ain't huggin' Nenslo. My
>dad said he's the leading cause of low sperm count amongst white males
>ages 18-25, which I happen to be.

Sperms are some lazy god damn creatures. Just because they don't show
up for the sperm rodeo when the doctor tries to count them doesn't
mean they're not there. And likely to pop up at the most inopportune
times, like if they smell some white wimmin ovum. Taking for granted
that YOU will have a six pack of beer and won't mind if they down a
few. And sperms have an incredible sense of smell. Sperms have been
observed penetrating 10 inch thick lead plates when there was a
particularly odorous lubricating vagina on the other side. And that
was just a chipmunk vagina. The weapons potential is enormous.

If you want to get a real sperm count you have to hum the spermatozoan
national anthem. If your parents never taught you the tune, any
country and western will work out OK too. Sperms are big country
western fans.

***

My prediction is that if nenslo does die on alt.slack, it will take
less than three posts for somebody to change the subject entirely.

--
Zapanaz
International Satanic Conspiracy
Customer Support Specialist
http://joecosby.com/
The victim was pregnant by seeing her picture on a website
featuring her dogs for sale.

Correspondent:: nenslo
Date: Thu, 23 Dec 2004 22:06:26 -0800

--------
Paul Casino wrote:
>
>
> So you see Nenslo, go ahead and die. Because nobody cares. Hear me?
>
> NOBODY CARES.
>
> Merry Fucking Christmass in the Fucking Face.
>
> Shithead.
>

Big pink hearts are floating around my head right now.

Correspondent:: Zapanaz
Date: Thu, 23 Dec 2004 22:25:03 -0800

--------
On Thu, 23 Dec 2004 22:06:26 -0800, nenslo wrote:

>Paul Casino wrote:
>>
>>
>> So you see Nenslo, go ahead and die. Because nobody cares. Hear me?
>>
>> NOBODY CARES.
>>
>> Merry Fucking Christmass in the Fucking Face.
>>
>> Shithead.
>>
>
>Big pink hearts are floating around my head right now.

http://tinyurl.com/3lsk8

nenslo at play.

--
Zapanaz
International Satanic Conspiracy
Customer Support Specialist
http://joecosby.com/
"Because you can't cotton to evil. No sir. You have to smack evil on
the nose with the rolled-up newspaper of justice and say, 'Bad evil.
Bad, BAD evil.'"
- The Tick

Correspondent:: mshotz@aol.commonkeypo (Rev. Richard Skull)
Date: 24 Dec 2004 16:52:27 GMT

--------
>>Big pink hearts are floating around my head right now.
>

What about the rest of those Marshmellow shapes in Lucky Charms?

MSHOTZ: The Post Post Modern Man

"War hath no Fury like a non-combatants"

Charles E. Montague

Correspondent:: "Paul Casino"
Date: 23 Dec 2004 23:55:21 -0800

--------
Homo.

Correspondent:: Unclaimed Mysteries
Date: Fri, 24 Dec 2004 17:01:40 GMT

--------
nenslo wrote:
> Paul Casino wrote:
>
>>
>>So you see Nenslo, go ahead and die. Because nobody cares. Hear me?
>>
>>NOBODY CARES.
>>
>>Merry Fucking Christmass in the Fucking Face.
>>
>>Shithead.
>>
>
>
> Big pink hearts are floating around my head right now.

Well, eat them, silly! They taste gamey once they stop beating.

--
It Came From C. L. Smith's Unclaimed Mysteries.
http://www.unclaimedmysteries.net

Correspondent:: HellPope Huey
Date: Tue, 28 Dec 2004 21:32:00 GMT

--------
In article <41CBB1E2.3594F5B6@yahoox.com>, nenslo
wrote:

> Big pink hearts are floating around my head right now.

That's because you failed to allow for adequate ventilation before you
began painting the cabinet.

--

HellPope Huey
People applauded rather than throwing fruit.
I take this as a good sign.

Infinite goodness
is creating a being you know, in advance,
is going to complain.
- William Peter Blatty, "Ninth Configuration"

"Does the noise in my head bother you,
bother you, bother you, bother you?"
- Loop Guru, "Loop Bites Dog"

Correspondent:: HdMrs. Salacia the Overseer
Date: Fri, 24 Dec 2004 01:46:42 -0600

--------
On 23 Dec 2004 19:42:03 -0800, "Paul Casino"
wrote:

>And Zapanaz? I ain't falling for your shite. I ain't huggin' Nenslo. My
>dad said he's the leading cause of low sperm count amongst white males
>ages 18-25, which I happen to be.

That's OK though! Because your girlfriend has enough sperm for the
both of yous.

Just kiddin'.

I would totally miss Grandma Knotsie. She's so spry with the blue
pencil.

Here Lies Grandma Knotsie.
She was mean,
she could crochet,
she was crotchety

Correspondent:: HellPope Huey
Date: Tue, 28 Dec 2004 21:30:40 GMT

--------
In article <1103859723.407789.175020@z14g2000cwz.googlegroups.com>,
"Paul Casino" wrote:

> Nenslo,
>
> I've been a practicing SubGenius since 1997 or so, and I've been
> reading your posts on alt.slack for about a year now. Knowing what I
> know about you, and the true DEPTHS to which your mean streak runs, I
> don't think ANY of us will be posting anything like that upon
> announcement of your death. Allow me to present a hypothetical scenario
> of your own death, as would appear on alt.slack:

BEST POST OF THE MUFUGGIN' WEEK.

Personally, I envision us standing in line to slug it out with Mrs.
Nenslo for shares of his personal goods as mementos and all going home
with gouged eyes and gored balls. Our own, not Nenslo's.

--

HellPope Huey
People applauded rather than throwing fruit.
I take this as a good sign.

Infinite goodness
is creating a being you know, in advance,
is going to complain.
- William Peter Blatty, "Ninth Configuration"

"Does the noise in my head bother you,
bother you, bother you, bother you?"
- Loop Guru, "Loop Bites Dog"

Correspondent:: "nu-monet v7.0"
Date: Thu, 23 Dec 2004 20:54:10 -0700

--------
nenslo wrote:
>
> When I die, don't go on alt.slack of all
> places posting some mopey crap about what
> a swell guy I really was in spite of my
> "rough edges" or "harsh exterior" or
> whatever other way saps try to ameliorate
> others' blatant assholism.
>
> May we all burn in hell.

I hope to post pics of the generic salad dressing
jar which contains your soul to a.b.s.

It's a real nice one. I even washed it out and
removed the label and I'll set it right on top of
one of my speakers so I can watch you dance as I
play music I like.

--
Give me thank or kill me.
--nu-monet

Correspondent:: mshotz@aol.commonkeypo (Rev. Richard Skull)
Date: 24 Dec 2004 04:00:08 GMT

--------
>When I die, don't go on alt.slack of all places posting some mopey crap
>about what a swell guy I really was in spite of my "rough edges" or
>"harsh exterior" or whatever other way saps try to ameliorate others'
>blatant assholism.
>
>May we all burn in hell.
>

Nenslo, we will NEVER say anything nice about you.

Thats a promise!

MSHOTZ: The Post Post Modern Man

"War hath no Fury like a non-combatants"

Charles E. Montague

Correspondent:: "Paul Casino"
Date: 23 Dec 2004 20:12:38 -0800

Correspondent:: Artemia Salina
Date: Fri, 24 Dec 2004 02:20:22 -0500

--------
On Thu, 23 Dec 2004 20:12:38 -0800, Paul Casino wrote:

> Allow me to present a hypothetical scenario
> of your own death, as would appear on alt.slack:

You forgot me:

I wish nenslo was still alive so's I could punch him in the
neck, skin, feet, neckbones, picnic and tongue. And I'm gonna
HUNT YOU DOWN, CASINO!

--
0:-) 0:-) 0:-) 0:-) (-:0 (-:0 (-:0 (-:0
0:-) Artemia Salina (-:0
0:-) Surrounded by Angels (-:0
0:-) 0:-) 0:-) 0:-) (-:0 (-:0 (-:0 (-:0

Correspondent:: "Paul Casino"
Date: 24 Dec 2004 05:00:22 -0800

--------
>And I'm gonna HUNT YOU DOWN, CASINO!

(Christ, are we doing this again? I thought this was over with.
Sigh...hoo-kay.)

"Then I have no choice...but to KEEL JEW ALL."
-"El", Once Upon a Time in Mexico

Correspondent:: Rev DJ Epoch
Date: 27 Dec 2004 13:51:17 GMT

--------
Artemia Salina wrote in
news:pan.2004.12.24.07.20.22.196583@sheayright.com:

> On Thu, 23 Dec 2004 20:12:38 -0800, Paul Casino wrote:
>
>> Allow me to present a hypothetical scenario
>> of your own death, as would appear on alt.slack:
>
> You forgot me:
>
> I wish nenslo was still alive so's I could punch him in the
> neck, skin, feet, neckbones, picnic and tongue. And I'm gonna
> HUNT YOU DOWN, CASINO!
>
>

Great galloping space herpies. He also forgot me, Legume, Blackout and
several others whos names shall not be spoken least it awaken chutulu from
his slumber. Take a number and quit snarling like that. You're scaring the
kiddlets again.

--
The Church of Our Lady of Prepetual Motion
Cathedral, Carwash and Dancehall- Home of the Traci Lords Memorial Brothel
Rev. DJ Epoch - proprietor and janitor
Divine Southern Redneck Yeti Clench Recruitment site: http://revdjepoch.COM

"If you want my delusions, you'll have to pry them from my cold,
dead hippocampus with a grapefruit spoon."
-- HellPope Huey

Correspondent:: nikolai kingsley
Date: Fri, 24 Dec 2004 18:54:28 +1100

--------

> When I die, don't go on alt.slack of all places posting some mopey crap
> about what a swell guy I really was in spite of my "rough edges" or
> "harsh exterior" or whatever other way saps try to ameliorate others'
> blatant assholism.

don't worry. there's a tombstone with the Goatse man engraved on it,
just waiting for someone to add the appropriate dates.

Correspondent:: Eddie Vroom
Date: Fri, 24 Dec 2004 22:15:36 GMT

--------
nenslo wrote:
> When I die, don't go on alt.slack of all places posting some mopey crap
> about what a swell guy I really was in spite of my "rough edges" or
> "harsh exterior" or whatever other way saps try to ameliorate others'
> blatant assholism.
>
> May we all burn in hell.

Hell? You're soaking in it!

FWIW, I've found that the people who piss me off and/or make me squirm
are the ones who have something useful to teach me. Which is the only
reason I don't killfile YOU some days.

Merry Xistmas, dude.

--
Art and Fashion for the New Conspiracy

http://www.cafepress.com/luciddragon

the Mystical RevvedErrand Doktor Eddie Vroom
Certified God by the holy authority of
the White Lotus Fortune Cookie Company
June 23, 2004