Smart bacon
Correspondent:: Zapanaz
Date: Fri, 24 Dec 2004 14:05:03 -0800
--------
Product spotted in the organic section at the grocery store: "Smart
Bacon".
I didn't get a box. It might very well turn out to be smarter than
me. I don't think I could deal with intelligent bacon at breakfast
but I know I couldn't deal with bacon which was haughty and
contemptuous of me at breakfast.
OTOH I could pretend it was nenslo and scream "WHO'S SO FUCKING SMART
NOW, MR BACON?" while spearing it with my fork and slicing it to
pieces with my knife. That would be a pretty satisfying way to start
the day.
damn now I need to run back to the grocery store.
--
Zapanaz
International Satanic Conspiracy
Customer Support Specialist
http://joecosby.com/
"One wants to be loved; failing this, to be admired; failing this, to be
feared; failing even this, to be hated and despised. One wants to arouse
some sort of feeling in people. The soul shrinks from the void and wants
contact at any price."
~ Hjalmar Soderberg
Correspondent:: "iDRMRSR"
Date: Fri, 24 Dec 2004 20:13:44 -0500
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You've put your finger on something that has always frustrated me.
Preheat a frying pan to a uniform heat. Cover it with strips of commercial
sliced bacon, thick or thin. Commence to fry.
Whenever I do this, there is always a couple of strips that POSITIVELY
REFUSE to crisp up. No matter how much you stir them or make them sit in
the grease, two or three strips out of a dozen or so NEVER uniformly crisp
up no matter what you do. And if you try to crisp them, all the rest burn.
It's the enigma of our times, I fear!
[*]
-----
Correspondent:: "Rev. 11D Meow!"
Date: Fri, 24 Dec 2004 17:56:18 -0800
--------
More likely,
It's the fear of your time enigmas.
Grill the bastards!
HOT GREASE!
COMING THROUGH!
my favorite utterance while working at IHOP a century ago....
Have I told you the disgusting potatoe pancake mix story yet?
never mind
never had one
never will
OIL WELLS!
"iDRMRSR" wrote in message
news:mcKdna0C2MtVI1HcRVn-3Q@giganews.com...
> You've put your finger on something that has always frustrated me.
>
> Preheat a frying pan to a uniform heat. Cover it with strips of
commercial
> sliced bacon, thick or thin. Commence to fry.
>
> Whenever I do this, there is always a couple of strips that POSITIVELY
> REFUSE to crisp up. No matter how much you stir them or make them sit in
> the grease, two or three strips out of a dozen or so NEVER uniformly crisp
> up no matter what you do. And if you try to crisp them, all the rest
burn.
>
> It's the enigma of our times, I fear!
>
> [*]
> -----
>
>
Correspondent:: kdetal@aol.com (kdetal)
Date: 26 Dec 2004 00:27:24 GMT
--------
Zapanaz wrote:
>Product spotted in the organic section at the grocery store: "Smart
>Bacon".
The pig is dead. Not too damn smart.
--
I do what I want. That's why I always win.
Correspondent:: König Prüß, GfbAEV
Date: Sun, 26 Dec 2004 00:46:19 GMT
--------
kdetal wrote:
>Zapanaz wrote:
>
>>Product spotted in the organic section at the grocery store: "Smart
>>Bacon".
>
>The pig is dead. Not too damn smart.
>
Some pigs saw it coming, and ran away to Canada;
which is how Canadian bacon got started.
Correspondent:: "26 bucks"
Date: Sun, 26 Dec 2004 16:10:51 -0800
--------
Shut up. Canadian Bacon is made of dog meat. Everyone knows that. Even
you know that.
Go to the slaughter house and seek out the truth.
Pigs are slaughtering collies.
Yum Yum Yum
Collie good in my Tum
; "GfbAEV" wrote in message
news:vRnzd.32181$uM5.26861@bgtnsc05-news.ops.worldnet.att.net...
| kdetal wrote:
| >Zapanaz wrote:
| >
| >>Product spotted in the organic section at the grocery store: "Smart
| >>Bacon".
| >
| >The pig is dead. Not too damn smart.
| >
|
| Some pigs saw it coming, and ran away to Canada;
| which is how Canadian bacon got started.
|
|
Correspondent:: wcb
Date: Sun, 26 Dec 2004 16:39:58 -0600
--------
Zapanaz wrote:
>
> Product spotted in the organic section at the grocery store: "Smart
> Bacon".
>
> I didn't get a box. It might very well turn out to be smarter than
> me. I don't think I could deal with intelligent bacon at breakfast
> but I know I couldn't deal with bacon which was haughty and
> contemptuous of me at breakfast.
If it was that smart, it wouldn't be in a box
sitting on a grocery store shelve.
>
> OTOH I could pretend it was nenslo and scream "WHO'S SO FUCKING SMART
> NOW, MR BACON?" while spearing it with my fork and slicing it to
> pieces with my knife. That would be a pretty satisfying way to start
> the day.
>
> damn now I need to run back to the grocery store.
It would probably make a better president than that moron, Bush.
--
Dance, monkeys, dance!
Cheerful Charlie