some dumb shit....
Correspondent:: "Rich Clark, aka Left Reverend Egg Plant, ULC, CotSG"
Date: Mon, 06 Dec 2004 00:18:20 -0500
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http://apnews.excite.com/article/20041204/D86OIMLO0.html
Couple Allegedly Report Stolen Marijuana
Dec 3, 10:13 PM (ET)
CALLAWAY, Fla. (AP) - Help, police, someone stole my pot! A Panhandle
couple is under arrest after notifying police Thursday that their
quarter-pound stash of marijuana was stolen and that they needed the
weed back, because they were going to later sell it.
"They're America's dumbest criminals," said Lt. Ricky Ramie, head of the
Bay County Sheriff's Office narcotics task force.
Deputies arrested 18-year-old John Douglas Sheetz and 17-year-old Misty
Ann Holmes and charged the duo with possession of marijuana with intent
to deliver and possession of drug paraphernalia.
According to the police report, the couple returned to the home they
share and found the home broken into and a quarter-pound of marijuana
missing. They immediately called authorities to report the break-in and
theft.
Police said the couple told them they were going to resell the marijuana
and allowed the detectives to search the apartment. Investigators
discovered several marijuana stems among other drug paraphernalia during
the search, The News Herald in Panama City reported for Saturday editions.
They were taken to the Bay County Jail and are each being held on
$17,500 bond.
----
One wonders if they've paid their $30.
Correspondent:: asscoassc@aol.comSHUTUP (AssCo Assc)
Date: 06 Dec 2004 05:45:15 GMT
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I was just reading an OLD news article that was the
same kind of "Dumb Criminal" story. It happened
in Buffalo NY -- 2002? -- the couple goes to the
airport to pick up the marajuana that was being
shipped in boxes labeled -- I forget what -- but
dumbasses pick up the "rush -- bodily organs"
boxes instead (all to say nothing of the airport
dumbasses for letting the wrong asshole pick up
ORGANS) -- they went off with the organs for a
long time -- I think it was over 12 hours -- then
decided to return the organs in exchange for the
long left-behind dope containers. By the time they
got back the dope dogs uncovered the stash and
they were immediately arrested.
I love "dumb criminal" stories. Crime Suspen-Stories
was my favorite E.C. comic -- no, actually it was
Shock Suspen-Stories come to think of it -- but Crime
was a solid #2 in my book. There should have been one
about the guy that cut off the victim's head and hands
so the authorities couldn't identify the body AND LEFT
THE CORPSE'S WALLET IN HIS BACK POCKET WITH A
DRIVERS LICENSE PHOTO ID.
Praise Jim Thompson, Charles Willeford and Weegee, too.
Frozen in the throat
It petrifies the tongue,
Turns mouth into a moat
Shoots arrows through the lung,
Then it contorts intestines -
Guttural rending pain -
Cramps muscles up, and next it
Sclerotifies the brain
-- Copyright 2004 Ilya Shambat
Correspondent:: phy
Date: Mon, 06 Dec 2004 14:12:40 -0000
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asscoassc@aol.comSHUTUP (AssCo Assc) wrote in
news:20041206004515.11401.00001814@mb-m29.aol.com:
> I love "dumb criminal" stories.
My two favorite are the one when a guy held up a convenience store and
after the clerk gave him the money in the drawer, he offered to buy the gun
from the dude, After the thief sold it, the guy held him till the cops got
there. The other one happened at a lumber yard. The theif was loading some
sheets of plywood into his truck but tripped and fell on top of the plywood
with his fingers stuck under it. The manager found him like that the next
morning.
-phy