A NEW JOKE WHICH IS MUCH BETTER THAN THE LAST ONES I PROMISE!!!!
Correspondent:: nenslo Date: Fri, 04 Feb 2005 22:43:59 -0800
--------
This is really much better than the last few jokes I wrote and I feel
sure it will be widely enjoyed.
Okay.
So, one day George W. Bush is running around the halls of the White
House, STARK NAKED, howling like a scalded pup, with the nozzle of a
flame-thrower stuck up his butt. The tank of the flame thrower is
dragging behind him, knocking holes in the walls and smashing the legs
off antique chairs and knocking the dovetails out of eighteenth century
hand painted Baltimore side tables and stuff. Also the tank is leaking
and leaving a trail of gasoline or whatever everywhere he goes.
SUDDENLY, a piece of an antique lyre-back chair gets stuck in the
trigger guard of the flame-thrower causing it to fire a GOUT OF FLAME up
President George W. Bush's BUTT. Just then he sees the two presidential
dogs, Omar and Mrs. McGillicuddy, and remembering how when he watched
Lassie as a kid Lassie always knew how to get help, he tries to yell at
the dogs "GO GET HELP" but instead of words coming out of his mouth a
FIVE FOOT LONG TONGUE OF FLAME comes out instead, SETTING THE DOGS ON
FIRE. They do not die but rather DASH ABOUT SHRIEKING, bashing into
things and setting the drapes on fire and eventually set fire to the
trail of leaking flame thrower fuel which has followed the path of the
flamethrower impaled President throughout the Executive Mansion. Soon
the entire building is on fire. Unfortunately, recent security upgrades
have been dedicated to keeping people from getting in, not helping
people to get out, so that every person in the White House sadly meets a
most horrific death by burning, suffocation, or by being crushed under
the collapsed structure as it eventually falls in upon itself, sending a
pillar of sparkling embers into the sky.
Well, that seemed a lot funnier before. I don't know what I was
thinking. It really did seem funny.
Correspondent:: "Tommy Webb" Date: Sat, 5 Feb 2005 04:08:02 -0500
--------
I would say stick with the day job, but with that much time on your hands,
you couldn't have one. fine one, please !
"nenslo" wrote in message
news:42046B2E.8CF3AD83@yahoox.com...
> This is really much better than the last few jokes I wrote and I feel
> sure it will be widely enjoyed.
>
> Okay.
>
> So, one day George W. Bush is running around the halls of the White
> House, STARK NAKED, howling like a scalded pup, with the nozzle of a
> flame-thrower stuck up his butt. The tank of the flame thrower is
> dragging behind him, knocking holes in the walls and smashing the legs
> off antique chairs and knocking the dovetails out of eighteenth century
> hand painted Baltimore side tables and stuff. Also the tank is leaking
> and leaving a trail of gasoline or whatever everywhere he goes.
> SUDDENLY, a piece of an antique lyre-back chair gets stuck in the
> trigger guard of the flame-thrower causing it to fire a GOUT OF FLAME up
> President George W. Bush's BUTT. Just then he sees the two presidential
> dogs, Omar and Mrs. McGillicuddy, and remembering how when he watched
> Lassie as a kid Lassie always knew how to get help, he tries to yell at
> the dogs "GO GET HELP" but instead of words coming out of his mouth a
> FIVE FOOT LONG TONGUE OF FLAME comes out instead, SETTING THE DOGS ON
> FIRE. They do not die but rather DASH ABOUT SHRIEKING, bashing into
> things and setting the drapes on fire and eventually set fire to the
> trail of leaking flame thrower fuel which has followed the path of the
> flamethrower impaled President throughout the Executive Mansion. Soon
> the entire building is on fire. Unfortunately, recent security upgrades
> have been dedicated to keeping people from getting in, not helping
> people to get out, so that every person in the White House sadly meets a
> most horrific death by burning, suffocation, or by being crushed under
> the collapsed structure as it eventually falls in upon itself, sending a
> pillar of sparkling embers into the sky.
>
>
> Well, that seemed a lot funnier before. I don't know what I was
> thinking. It really did seem funny.
Correspondent:: nenslo Date: Sat, 05 Feb 2005 19:58:37 -0800
--------
Tommy Webb wrote:
>
> I would say stick with the day job, but with that much time on your hands,
> you couldn't have one. fine one, please !
What's really funny is how frequently these jokes of mine provoke people
to use the term "day job."
Correspondent:: "Dick" Date: Sun, 6 Feb 2005 21:55:39 +0800
--------
But that really says it all doesn't it?
"nenslo" wrote in message
news:420595ED.6DC0DD20@yahoox.com...
> Tommy Webb wrote:
>>
>> I would say stick with the day job, but with that much time on your
>> hands,
>> you couldn't have one. fine one, please !
>
>
> What's really funny is how frequently these jokes of mine provoke people
> to use the term "day job."
Correspondent:: König Prüß, GfbAEV Date: Sun, 06 Feb 2005 14:21:03 GMT
--------
>But that really says it all doesn't it?
>
>"nenslo" wrote in message
>news:420595ED.6DC0DD20@yahoox.com...
>> Tommy Webb wrote:
>>>
>>> I would say stick with the day job, but with that much time on your
>>> hands,
>>> you couldn't have one. fine one, please !
>>
>>
>> What's really funny is how frequently these jokes of mine provoke people
>> to use the term "day job."
>
>
>
Correspondent:: nenslo Date: Sun, 06 Feb 2005 16:13:07 -0800
--------
>
> "nenslo" wrote
> > What's really funny is how frequently these jokes of mine provoke people
> > to use the term "day job."
Dick wrote:
>
> But that really says it all doesn't it?
Yeah it shows where their heads are at alright.
Correspondent:: "Nat" Date: Sat, 5 Feb 2005 23:05:10 +1000
--------
"nenslo" wrote in message
news:42046B2E.8CF3AD83@yahoox.com...
> This is really much better than the last few jokes I wrote and I feel
> sure it will be widely enjoyed.
>
> Okay.
>
> So, one day George W. Bush is running around the halls of the White
> House, STARK NAKED, howling like a scalded pup, with the nozzle of a
> flame-thrower stuck up his butt. The tank of the flame thrower is
> dragging behind him, knocking holes in the walls and smashing the legs
> off antique chairs and knocking the dovetails out of eighteenth century
> hand painted Baltimore side tables and stuff. Also the tank is leaking
> and leaving a trail of gasoline or whatever everywhere he goes.
> SUDDENLY, a piece of an antique lyre-back chair gets stuck in the
> trigger guard of the flame-thrower causing it to fire a GOUT OF FLAME up
> President George W. Bush's BUTT. Just then he sees the two presidential
> dogs, Omar and Mrs. McGillicuddy, and remembering how when he watched
> Lassie as a kid Lassie always knew how to get help, he tries to yell at
> the dogs "GO GET HELP" but instead of words coming out of his mouth a
> FIVE FOOT LONG TONGUE OF FLAME comes out instead, SETTING THE DOGS ON
> FIRE. They do not die but rather DASH ABOUT SHRIEKING, bashing into
> things and setting the drapes on fire and eventually set fire to the
> trail of leaking flame thrower fuel which has followed the path of the
> flamethrower impaled President throughout the Executive Mansion. Soon
> the entire building is on fire. Unfortunately, recent security upgrades
> have been dedicated to keeping people from getting in, not helping
> people to get out, so that every person in the White House sadly meets a
> most horrific death by burning, suffocation, or by being crushed under
> the collapsed structure as it eventually falls in upon itself, sending a
> pillar of sparkling embers into the sky.
>
>
> Well, that seemed a lot funnier before. I don't know what I was
> thinking. It really did seem funny.
You'll only catch me out once after that PLONK!!
>PLONK<
Correspondent:: "Rev. Richard Skull" Date: 5 Feb 2005 07:19:13 -0800
--------
I thought that was what Bush was talking about in his recent State of
The Union Address?
Correspondent:: nikolai kingsley Date: Sun, 06 Feb 2005 02:47:06 +1100
--------
> Well, that seemed a lot funnier before. I don't know what I was
> thinking. It really did seem funny.
i really want to hear this read out as a serious news report on Al-Jazeera.
Correspondent:: Zapanaz Date: Sat, 05 Feb 2005 10:03:12 -0800
--------
On Fri, 04 Feb 2005 22:43:59 -0800, nenslo wrote:
>This is really much better than the last few jokes I wrote and I feel
>sure it will be widely enjoyed.
>
>Okay.
>
>So, one day George W. Bush is running around the halls of the White
>House, STARK NAKED, howling like a scalded pup, with the nozzle of a
>flame-thrower stuck up his butt. The tank of the flame thrower is
>dragging behind him, knocking holes in the walls and smashing the legs
>off antique chairs and knocking the dovetails out of eighteenth century
>hand painted Baltimore side tables and stuff. Also the tank is leaking
>and leaving a trail of gasoline or whatever everywhere he goes.
>SUDDENLY, a piece of an antique lyre-back chair gets stuck in the
>trigger guard of the flame-thrower causing it to fire a GOUT OF FLAME up
>President George W. Bush's BUTT. Just then he sees the two presidential
>dogs, Omar and Mrs. McGillicuddy, and remembering how when he watched
>Lassie as a kid Lassie always knew how to get help, he tries to yell at
>the dogs "GO GET HELP" but instead of words coming out of his mouth a
>FIVE FOOT LONG TONGUE OF FLAME comes out instead, SETTING THE DOGS ON
>FIRE. They do not die but rather DASH ABOUT SHRIEKING, bashing into
>things and setting the drapes on fire and eventually set fire to the
>trail of leaking flame thrower fuel which has followed the path of the
>flamethrower impaled President throughout the Executive Mansion. Soon
>the entire building is on fire. Unfortunately, recent security upgrades
>have been dedicated to keeping people from getting in, not helping
>people to get out, so that every person in the White House sadly meets a
>most horrific death by burning, suffocation, or by being crushed under
>the collapsed structure as it eventually falls in upon itself, sending a
>pillar of sparkling embers into the sky.
>
>
>Well, that seemed a lot funnier before. I don't know what I was
>thinking. It really did seem funny.
I think it was the silly voice you told it in before. Try the silly
voice again.
--
Zapanaz
International Satanic Conspiracy
Customer Support Specialist
http://joecosby.com/
That simple minded sfb snorted enough coke to build bin
Laden's mountain fortress. Let's see him stand before a
wartime tribunal.
- John Starret
Correspondent:: "ArWeGod" Date: Mon, 07 Feb 2005 06:52:04 GMT
--------
"nenslo" wrote in message
news:42046B2E.8CF3AD83@yahoox.com...
> This is really much better than the last few jokes I wrote and I feel
> sure it will be widely enjoyed.
>
> Okay.
>
> So, one day George W. Bush is running around the halls of the White
> House, STARK NAKED, howling like a scalded pup, with the nozzle of a
> flame-thrower stuck up his butt. The tank of the flame thrower is
> dragging behind him, knocking holes in the walls and smashing the legs
> off antique chairs and knocking the dovetails out of eighteenth
century
> hand painted Baltimore side tables and stuff. Also the tank is
leaking
> and leaving a trail of gasoline or whatever everywhere he goes.
> SUDDENLY, a piece of an antique lyre-back chair gets stuck in the
> trigger guard of the flame-thrower causing it to fire a GOUT OF FLAME
up
> President George W. Bush's BUTT. Just then he sees the two
presidential
> dogs, Omar and Mrs. McGillicuddy, and remembering how when he watched
> Lassie as a kid Lassie always knew how to get help, he tries to yell
at
> the dogs "GO GET HELP" but instead of words coming out of his mouth a
> FIVE FOOT LONG TONGUE OF FLAME comes out instead, SETTING THE DOGS ON
> FIRE. They do not die but rather DASH ABOUT SHRIEKING, bashing into
> things and setting the drapes on fire and eventually set fire to the
> trail of leaking flame thrower fuel which has followed the path of the
> flamethrower impaled President throughout the Executive Mansion. Soon
> the entire building is on fire. Unfortunately, recent security
upgrades
> have been dedicated to keeping people from getting in, not helping
> people to get out, so that every person in the White House sadly meets
a
> most horrific death by burning, suffocation, or by being crushed under
> the collapsed structure as it eventually falls in upon itself, sending
a
> pillar of sparkling embers into the sky.
>
>
> Well, that seemed a lot funnier before. I don't know what I was
> thinking. It really did seem funny.
>
You should have said "members", not "embers".
--
ArWeOnlyOrLonely
Correspondent:: Clothahump Date: Tue, 08 Feb 2005 13:29:51 GMT
--------
nenslo wrote:
> This is really much better than the last few jokes I wrote and I feel
> sure it will be widely enjoyed.
>
> Okay.
>
> So, one day George W. Bush is running around the halls of the White
> House, STARK NAKED, howling like a scalded pup, with the nozzle of a
> flame-thrower stuck up his butt. The tank of the flame thrower is
> dragging behind him, knocking holes in the walls and smashing the legs
> off antique chairs and knocking the dovetails out of eighteenth century
> hand painted Baltimore side tables and stuff. Also the tank is leaking
> and leaving a trail of gasoline or whatever everywhere he goes.
> SUDDENLY, a piece of an antique lyre-back chair gets stuck in the
> trigger guard of the flame-thrower causing it to fire a GOUT OF FLAME up
> President George W. Bush's BUTT. Just then he sees the two presidential
> dogs, Omar and Mrs. McGillicuddy, and remembering how when he watched
> Lassie as a kid Lassie always knew how to get help, he tries to yell at
> the dogs "GO GET HELP" but instead of words coming out of his mouth a
> FIVE FOOT LONG TONGUE OF FLAME comes out instead, SETTING THE DOGS ON
> FIRE. They do not die but rather DASH ABOUT SHRIEKING, bashing into
> things and setting the drapes on fire and eventually set fire to the
> trail of leaking flame thrower fuel which has followed the path of the
> flamethrower impaled President throughout the Executive Mansion. Soon
> the entire building is on fire. Unfortunately, recent security upgrades
> have been dedicated to keeping people from getting in, not helping
> people to get out, so that every person in the White House sadly meets a
> most horrific death by burning, suffocation, or by being crushed under
> the collapsed structure as it eventually falls in upon itself, sending a
> pillar of sparkling embers into the sky.
>
>
> Well, that seemed a lot funnier before. I don't know what I was
> thinking. It really did seem funny.
======
Dude, you need to stay on your medication schedule. Seriously. What
you post is truly sick. Not sick-funny, just sick.
--
Return address has been spamguarded. Remove NO SPAM to reply.
Correspondent:: "Fletis Humplebacker"
Date: Tue, 8 Feb 2005 08:19:13 -0800
--------
"Clothahump"
> nenslo wrote:
> > Well, that seemed a lot funnier before. I don't know what I was
> > thinking. It really did seem funny.
> ======
> Dude, you need to stay on your medication schedule. Seriously. What
> you post is truly sick. Not sick-funny, just sick.
I killfiled him awhile back. It would be nice
if you didn't repost his hate.
Correspondent:: "sputnik" Date: Wed, 09 Feb 2005 02:40:46 GMT
--------
"Fletis Humplebacker" wrote in message
news:110hpk13h7n53fb@corp.supernews.com...
>
> "Clothahump"
> > nenslo wrote:
>
>
> > > Well, that seemed a lot funnier before. I don't know what I was
> > > thinking. It really did seem funny.
> > ======
> > Dude, you need to stay on your medication schedule. Seriously. What
> > you post is truly sick. Not sick-funny, just sick.
>
>
> I killfiled him awhile back. It would be nice
> if you didn't repost his hate.
>
>
You killfiled Nenslo?
Oooh, I wouldn't want to be in your shoes.
Correspondent:: HellPope Huey Date: Wed, 09 Feb 2005 03:11:18 GMT
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In article ,
"sputnik" wrote:
> You killfiled Nenslo?
> Oooh, I wouldn't want to be in your shoes.
Its okay, he coated him in olive oil first.
--
HellPope Huey
I mostly just want a better chair
and to not have to hold the chicken
between my knees.
Is that so WRONG??
How do I know pornography depraves and corrupts?
It depraves and corrupts me.
- Malcolm Muggeridge
"You think Christmas falls out of a clear blue sky??
Well it DOESN'T!! It falls out of my holly-jolly BUTT!!"
- "Family Guy"
Correspondent:: nenslo Date: Tue, 08 Feb 2005 22:37:06 -0800
--------
Clothahump wrote:
>
> ======
> Dude, you need to stay on your medication schedule. Seriously. What
> you post is truly sick. Not sick-funny, just sick.
>
Do you think I should keep my day job?
Correspondent:: "Blackout" Date: Wed, 9 Feb 2005 05:56:47 -0700
--------
"nenslo" wrote
>> Dude, you need to stay on your medication schedule. Seriously. What
>> you post is truly sick. Not sick-funny, just sick.
>>
>
> Do you think I should keep my day job?
if your day job is writing more jokes the answer is YES
Correspondent:: König Prüß, GfbAEV Date: Wed, 09 Feb 2005 13:30:27 GMT
--------
"Blackout" wrote:
>
>"nenslo" wrote
>
>
>>> Dude, you need to stay on your medication schedule. Seriously. What
>>> you post is truly sick. Not sick-funny, just sick.
>>>
>>
>> Do you think I should keep my day job?
>
>if your day job is writing more jokes the answer is YES
>
>
Yeah, then his wife can keep calling him "Nightshift"