Excremeditation Evolution
Correspondent:: "nu-monet v7.0"
Date: Wed, 09 Feb 2005 17:37:50 -0700
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Okay, they got this one halfway right, that is,
finally making a toilets for those with BIG ASSES.
But why do they still make them so damn low?
News flash: the majority of adults in the US are
taller than 5'2". So make a DAMN TALL TOILET for
a change. Seriously, a foot taller would be just
hunky dory, and worth the extra expense. And repeal
that stupid fucking low-capacity tank law, too.
http://www.greatjohn.com/
--
"YOU BELONG TO US NOW!"
"GET DOWN WITH MY SICKNESS!!"
--Kino Beman, brand name
Correspondent:: HellPope Huey
Date: Thu, 10 Feb 2005 01:33:25 GMT
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In article <420AACDE.4DF3@succeeds.com>,
"nu-monet v7.0" wrote:
> Okay, they got this one halfway right, that is,
> finally making a toilets for those with BIG ASSES.
> But why do they still make them so damn low?
> News flash: the majority of adults in the US are
> taller than 5'2". So make a DAMN TALL TOILET for
> a change. Seriously, a foot taller would be just
> hunky dory, and worth the extra expense. And repeal
> that stupid fucking low-capacity tank law, too.
> http://www.greatjohn.com/
Whoo hooo, at last, the IDRMRSR model!!! Now I won't have to squat over
a galvanized tub out back no more.
"I warsh mahself with a rag on a stick!"
- bloated possible future Bart Simpson
--
HellPope Huey
Searching for my inner Bastard
or my name isn't Sphinkler Bumcrot
If we are forced, at every hour,
to watch or listen to horrible events,
this constant stream of ghastly impressions
will deprive even the most delicate among us
of all respect for humanity.
- Cicero
Exit, pursued by a bear.
-William Shakespeare,
Stage direction in "The Winter's Tale"
Correspondent:: "Ellis Dee"
Date: Thu, 10 Feb 2005 07:14:47 -0500
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"HellPope Huey" wrote in >
> Whoo hooo, at last, the IDRMRSR model!!!
This would be more fitting:
http://www.news.com.au/story/0,10117,11993562-13762,00.html
Correspondent:: HellPope Huey
Date: Thu, 10 Feb 2005 17:22:29 GMT
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In article ,
"Ellis Dee" wrote:
> "HellPope Huey" wrote in >
> > Whoo hooo, at last, the IDRMRSR model!!!
>
> This would be more fitting:
> http://www.news.com.au/story/0,10117,11993562-13762,00.html
IDRMRSR has a trunk? Well who woulda thunk it?
--
HellPope Huey
Doin' the Lindy to Hendrix
Surprised lady in restroom:
"Hey, this is for ladies only!"
Peter O'Toole, inebriated:
"And so is *this*, ma'am,
but every now and again
I have to run a little water through it."
~ "My Favorite Year"
I can't put a sentence together -
thank God I can take my clothes off.
~ Sharon Stone
Correspondent:: "iDRMRSR"
Date: Wed, 9 Feb 2005 20:56:23 -0500
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>>So make a DAMN TALL TOILET for
a change.
No, that's not the answer. For example, I'm prolly 4 inches shorter than
you standing up, if you and I sat on equal barstools, the top of my head
would be six inches above yours. Hence, to position the anus over the water
at the proper height requires a SHORTER toilet.
Actually, this potty looks like a DREAM CUM TRUE. Did you check out the
"anti slip fins" and the 2,000 pound ceramic test? Perfect.
A higher toilet would mean one's feet would dangle above ground. This leads
to the legs falling asleep on the crapper, which usually signals the end of
the excremeditation period, long before I'm willing to quit.
Not to mention, the low angle results in optimum anterior haunch exposure
for the final phase of the ceremony.
About the only thing they could add to this thing (and for the PRICE it
ought to be standard) is a bidet head, or better yet, large self cleaning
relinable dinosaur hydraulic tongue. Personally, I like my toilet to do
everything for me besides grunting. But I have yet to find one.
This, however, comes pretty close...
[*]
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Correspondent:: HellPope Huey
Date: Thu, 10 Feb 2005 02:47:38 GMT
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In article ,
"iDRMRSR" wrote:
> Actually, this potty looks like a DREAM CUM TRUE. Did you check out the
> "anti slip fins" and the 2,000 pound ceramic test? Perfect.
If you have hit 2000 pounds, you no longer need a toilet, you need a
PASTURE. Make a boom-boom for "Bob!"
--
HellPope Huey
Searching for my inner Bastard
or my name isn't Sphinkler Bumcrot
If we are forced, at every hour,
to watch or listen to horrible events,
this constant stream of ghastly impressions
will deprive even the most delicate among us
of all respect for humanity.
- Cicero
Exit, pursued by a bear.
-William Shakespeare,
Stage direction in "The Winter's Tale"