There IS a "Bob"
Correspondent:: Sternodox
Date: Thu, 17 Feb 2005 13:16:06 -0600
--------
So I get this fucking HORRIBLE gum infection the day before Valentine's
Day and go the the dentist, who squirts some foul tasting shit in my
mouth and gives me a prescription for an antibiotic. Knowing she's a
hard-ass about pain medication I don't even ask, figuring I'll take a
few ibuprofen when I get home and tough it out. I drive to the local
Walgreens and take my script in to get it filled and the pharmacist
tells me it'll be about twenty minutes. Right behind me is this skanky
looking fuck who's sniffling and rocking back and forth on his feet and
stinking to high fucking heaven. I decide I don't want to stand there
smelling the crazy looking fuck, so I decide to go out to the car for a
cig and wait for my script to be filled. About half way through my
Basic Ultra Lite, skanky fuck comes walking out of the pharmacy and
heads for his car. He's got two bags under his arm and he drops one of
'em. So, being the good Samaritan I am, I open the window and yell,
"Hey!" at the dude. He looks at me and FREAKS! Then he hauls ass to his
car and peels out! So I get out, pick up the bag and look inside. It's
two prescription bottles, one for 90 Percodan and one for 90 10mg
Valium!
OK, now the little angel and the little devil pop up, one on each
shoulder, and the little devil is saying, "YOU FUCKING SCORED, MAN!!!!"
Meanwhile, the little angel is saying, "The poor guy must be in pain.
Take the medicine back in to the pharmacy." Well, I thought I'd just
smoke another cig while the two little fuckers battled it out and as
soon as I light up THREE cop cars come whooshing into the parking lot,
screeching to a halt right BEHIND my car. Two cops run into the
pharmacy and the other one runs over to MY CAR. He asks me if I saw a
guy who looks like ... and he describes skanky fuck to a 'T.' I said,
"No sir." Cop says, "This guy's been passing bad scripts all over town.
We'll get him. Thanks for your time." And the entire time I'm holding
dude's pills IN MY HANDS!!!!!
Cop goes into the pharmacy, I stash the stash in the gove box and walk
in to pick up my antibiotics. The pharmacist tells the cops that I was
standing in line with skanky fuck and so I have to give a description
to the cops, who then thank me AGAIN and leave.
I walk back out to the car and drive home saying, "FUCK the ibuprofen."
THANKS "BOB"!!!!!!!!!
Correspondent:: Sternodox
Date: Thu, 17 Feb 2005 13:21:54 -0600
--------
In article <170220051316063690%killme@killme.com>, Sternodox
wrote:
> So I get this fucking HORRIBLE gum infection the day before Valentine's
> Day and go the the dentist, who squirts some foul tasting shit in my
> mouth and gives me a prescription for an antibiotic. Knowing she's a
> hard-ass about pain medication I don't even ask, figuring I'll take a
> few ibuprofen when I get home and tough it out. I drive to the local
> Walgreens and take my script in to get it filled and the pharmacist
> tells me it'll be about twenty minutes. Right behind me is this skanky
> looking fuck who's sniffling and rocking back and forth on his feet and
> stinking to high fucking heaven. I decide I don't want to stand there
> smelling the crazy looking fuck, so I decide to go out to the car for a
> cig and wait for my script to be filled. About half way through my
> Basic Ultra Lite, skanky fuck comes walking out of the pharmacy and
> heads for his car. He's got two bags under his arm and he drops one of
> 'em. So, being the good Samaritan I am, I open the window and yell,
> "Hey!" at the dude. He looks at me and FREAKS! Then he hauls ass to his
> car and peels out! So I get out, pick up the bag and look inside. It's
> two prescription bottles, one for 90 Percodan and one for 90 10mg
> Valium!
>
> OK, now the little angel and the little devil pop up, one on each
> shoulder, and the little devil is saying, "YOU FUCKING SCORED, MAN!!!!"
> Meanwhile, the little angel is saying, "The poor guy must be in pain.
> Take the medicine back in to the pharmacy." Well, I thought I'd just
> smoke another cig while the two little fuckers battled it out and as
> soon as I light up THREE cop cars come whooshing into the parking lot,
> screeching to a halt right BEHIND my car. Two cops run into the
> pharmacy and the other one runs over to MY CAR. He asks me if I saw a
> guy who looks like ... and he describes skanky fuck to a 'T.' I said,
> "No sir." Cop says, "This guy's been passing bad scripts all over town.
> We'll get him. Thanks for your time." And the entire time I'm holding
> dude's pills IN MY HANDS!!!!!
>
> Cop goes into the pharmacy, I stash the stash in the gove box and walk
> in to pick up my antibiotics. The pharmacist tells the cops that I was
> standing in line with skanky fuck and so I have to give a description
> to the cops, who then thank me AGAIN and leave.
>
> I walk back out to the car and drive home saying, "FUCK the ibuprofen."
> THANKS "BOB"!!!!!!!!!
Make that "go TO the dentist" and "GLOVE"box. Shit, must be the pils!
Correspondent:: "Assco"
Date: 17 Feb 2005 13:08:59 -0800
--------
Somehow I suspect a "fight club" ending to
this story where the antagonist and protagonist
turn out to be the same guy.