Correspondent:: "Kevin Cunningham" Date: Sun, 23 Jan 2005 15:37:38 GMT
--------
Lets be realistic, we are neither the best looking nor the most "normal"
thinking group. Most of us would be a 5 on a good day. Usually this would
cause problems, dating is out of the question whether from being ugly or
from things like wearing a WW"B"D (What Would "BoB" Do) bracelet.
I know, I'm one of you. I have been discouraged for years, decades. I knew
I would never be a hero so I thought I was out of the mix. But then I found
an answer that both pays well and gives me some dignity, the Hench Persons,
Stooges and Second Banannas International Union (AFL-CIO).
We Henchers do the heavy lifting for the hero while he woos the heroine and
wins out over evil. In the past, without union representation, we were paid
little and got no benefits. Now we work a normal, 40 hour work week and get
great benefits such as if the hero gets a girl (or guy, depending), we have
to get an appropriate person or thing. Think of Andy Rooney, at least he
had a mother. Now we not only get a mother (if appropriate) we get paid!
This goes for Stooges too.
Think of how nice it will be to look a hero in the face and say "That'll be
overtime, asshole!". This works for Connieites and Yeti's of all stripes.
Let's remember that our union is open only to Hench Persons, Stooges and
Second Banannas, no heros or heroines allowed.
Of course for we the Sub-Geniuses thats a small price to pay. My guess is
that only Ivan Stang, Nenslo and Hdmstr. Salacia would be in the hero ranks.
The rest of us can walk right up and join.
See you at the next union picknick!
Rev. Dr. Junior Mints
Member HPSSB, Int.
Correspondent:: "nu-monet v7.0" Date: Sun, 23 Jan 2005 09:35:38 -0700
--------
Kevin Cunningham wrote:
>
> ...But then I found an answer that both pays well and
> gives me some dignity, the Hench Persons, Stooges
> and Second Banannas International Union (AFL-CIO).
Except first of all, many of us live in right-to-hench
states. And if the AFL-CIO couldn't even break into
Wal-Mart, what chance do they have of cracking the
tougher nuts of The Church?
--
I don't know what you're talking about.
I've never met you before in my life.
That story sounds like utter bullshit.
I wasn't there and it wasn't me.
I am *not* in denial. Shut up.
--nu-monet
Correspondent:: nenslo Date: Sun, 23 Jan 2005 11:33:16 -0800
--------
Kevin Cunningham wrote:
>
> Lets be realistic, we are neither the best looking nor the most "normal"
> thinking group. Most of us would be a 5 on a good day.
Yeah, I.Q.!
> I know, I'm one of you.
HOLY CRAP how many of me ARE THERE out there????
>I have been discouraged for years, decades. I knew
> I would never be a hero so I thought I was out of the mix.
I still have a box of the mix left but I think it's a little weevily.
>
> We Henchers do the heavy lifting for the hero while he woos the heroine and
> wins out over evil. In the past, without union representation, we were paid
> little and got no benefits. Now we work a normal, 40 hour work week and get
> great benefits such as if the hero gets a girl (or guy, depending), we have
> to get an appropriate person or thing. Think of Andy Rooney, at least he
> had a mother. Now we not only get a mother (if appropriate) we get paid!
> This goes for Stooges too.
You must be thinking of Mickey Rooney. Andy grew out of the black crud
that accumulates inside the bathroom drain.
>
> Think of how nice it will be to look a hero in the face and say "That'll be
> overtime, asshole!".
Think of how nice it will be to hear the response, "Clean out your desk.
I'm calling security in five minutes."
>This works for Connieites and Yeti's of all stripes.
> Let's remember that our union is open only to Hench Persons, Stooges and
> Second Banannas, no heros or heroines allowed.
>
> Of course for we the Sub-Geniuses thats a small price to pay. My guess is
> that only Ivan Stang, Nenslo and Hdmstr. Salacia would be in the hero ranks.
You know why that is? BECAUSE YOU CHUMPS ARE STILL LOOKING FOR A WAY TO
BE SOMEBODY ELSE'S EMPLOYEE except in a way that steals half your life
in a "not so bad" way instead of a "horrible" way.
> The rest of us can walk right up and join.
And bend over, saying "SubGenius my ass."
Correspondent:: kdetal@aol.com (kdetal)
Date: 24 Jan 2005 00:33:05 GMT
--------
Nenslo wrote:
>You know why that is? BECAUSE YOU CHUMPS ARE STILL LOOKING FOR A WAY TO
>BE SOMEBODY ELSE'S EMPLOYEE except in a way that steals half your life
>in a "not so bad" way instead of a "horrible" way.
Feel free to finance my retirement.
Correspondent:: Artemia Salina Date: Mon, 24 Jan 2005 01:27:43 -0500
--------
On Mon, 24 Jan 2005 00:33:05 +0000, kdetal wrote:
> Feel free to finance my retirement.
You can retire right now, right this minute, if you want.
Correspondent:: nenslo Date: Sun, 23 Jan 2005 23:04:30 -0800
--------
Artemia Salina wrote:
>
> On Mon, 24 Jan 2005 00:33:05 +0000, kdetal wrote:
>
>
> > Feel free to finance my retirement.
>
> You can retire right now, right this minute, if you want.
Like I said. It's those last last three words that are tough, when you
have a severe case of oculorectosis, known to the layman as BUTTEYE.
"I'd like to retire, BUTTEYE...." "I hate my job BUTTEYE..."
Correspondent:: HellPope Huey Date: Mon, 24 Jan 2005 17:09:35 GMT
--------
In article <41F49DFE.3748CC5F@yahoox.com>, nenslo
wrote:
> Like I said. It's those last last three words that are tough, when you
> have a severe case of oculorectosis, known to the layman as BUTTEYE.
> "I'd like to retire, BUTTEYE...." "I hate my job BUTTEYE..."
Butteye is Popey's flaming gay cousin no one likes to talk about.
--
HellPope Huey
Caligula was merely misunderstood
"Its against my religion to oppose my religion."
- former national security wonk John Ashcroft
"I don't cut the ribbon at the opening of markets.
I don't stand next to the mayor.
Hit your baseball into my yard
and you'll never see it again."
- Tom Waits
Correspondent:: kdetal@aol.com (kdetal)
Date: 24 Jan 2005 22:23:21 GMT
--------
Nenslo wrote:
>Artemia Salina wrote:
>>
>> On Mon, 24 Jan 2005 00:33:05 +0000, kdetal wrote:
>>
>>
>> > Feel free to finance my retirement.
>>
>> You can retire right now, right this minute, if you want.
>
>Like I said. It's those last last three words that are tough, when you
>have a severe case of oculorectosis, known to the layman as BUTTEYE.
>"I'd like to retire, BUTTEYE...." "I hate my job BUTTEYE..."
Feel free to finance my retirement.
Correspondent:: nenslo Date: Sun, 23 Jan 2005 23:01:37 -0800
--------
kdetal wrote:
>
> Nenslo wrote:
>
> >You know why that is? BECAUSE YOU CHUMPS ARE STILL LOOKING FOR A WAY TO
> >BE SOMEBODY ELSE'S EMPLOYEE except in a way that steals half your life
> >in a "not so bad" way instead of a "horrible" way.
>
> Feel free to finance my retirement.
Feel free to take your head out of your ass long enough to figure out a
simple way to retire RIGHT NOW and live happily for the rest of your
life. LIKE I DID.
Correspondent:: Zapanaz Date: Sun, 23 Jan 2005 23:20:15 -0800
--------
On Sun, 23 Jan 2005 23:01:37 -0800, nenslo wrote:
>Feel free to take your head out of your ass long enough to figure out a
>simple way to retire RIGHT NOW and live happily for the rest of your
>life. LIKE I DID.
snerk.
yeah you kind of lead my list of happy-seeming people
well I'm just POINTING IT OUT that's all.
--
Zapanaz
International Satanic Conspiracy
Customer Support Specialist
http://joecosby.com/
This is the way the world ends
This is the way the world ends
This is the way the world ends
Not with a bang but with a whimper.
T.S. Eliot
Correspondent:: HellPope Huey Date: Mon, 24 Jan 2005 17:11:20 GMT
--------
In article <6c89v019r3fh44gqf2eg3ajqd2ctc0jj5n@4ax.com>,
Zapanaz wrote:
> On Sun, 23 Jan 2005 23:01:37 -0800, nenslo wrote:
>
> >Feel free to take your head out of your ass long enough to figure out a
> >simple way to retire RIGHT NOW and live happily for the rest of your
> >life. LIKE I DID.
>
> snerk.
> yeah you kind of lead my list of happy-seeming people
> well I'm just POINTING IT OUT that's all.
God had a purpose for Nenslo's life. It just didn't end up including
him getting to enjoy much of the process. That Almighty is a right
BASTARD and probably a snooty Beligian banker to boot.
--
HellPope Huey
Caligula was merely misunderstood
"Its against my religion to oppose my religion."
- former national security wonk John Ashcroft
"I don't cut the ribbon at the opening of markets.
I don't stand next to the mayor.
Hit your baseball into my yard
and you'll never see it again."
- Tom Waits
Correspondent:: HdMrs. Salacia the Overseer Date: Sun, 23 Jan 2005 14:33:48 -0600
--------
On Sun, 23 Jan 2005 15:37:38 GMT, "Kevin Cunningham"
wrote:
>Lets be realistic,
Heros don't spend this much time at the computer.
Correspondent:: "Modemac" Date: 23 Jan 2005 17:04:36 -0800
--------
Kevin Cunningham wrote:
> Think of how nice it will be to look a hero in the face and say
"That'll be
> overtime, asshole!".
"You knew the job was dangerous when you took it, Fred."
Correspondent:: "ArWeGod" Date: Thu, 27 Jan 2005 12:22:31 GMT
--------
"Modemac" wrote in message
news:1106528099.036926.109420@c13g2000cwb.googlegroups.com...
>
> Kevin Cunningham wrote:
> > Think of how nice it will be to look a hero in the face and say
> "That'll be
> > overtime, asshole!".
> "You knew the job was dangerous when you took it, Fred."
>