How the Church really "works," dahling
Correspondent:: HellPope Huey
Date: Mon, 03 Jan 2005 05:20:33 GMT
--------
I thought everyone realized the first and last action of any Church
activity was to be fucked like you were a Nerf vagina soaked in hash
oil. I was never a Catlick, so my first unrighteous boning took place
when I was 5 and a drunken department store Santa peed on ME. It went
downhill from there, then up again when I was recruited by Dobbs, then
down when I realized that roughly half of the "Heirarchy" saved their
urine in jars and the other half filled their water guns with it. Oh
well, that's Religion for you.
Praise Jack Shit and stop kidding yourself. Its a HOBBY and all too
suspiciously like storing your porno in a box that has a package of
lunchmeat in it because the scent magnifies the experience for you after
its ripened for a few days. Connie Kali Out-Are-In-Dutch.
--
HellPope Huey
Official Dobbs Geek Orthodox Ministurb
"This may be the year
when we finally come face to face with ourselves;
finally just lay back and say it --
that we are really just a nation
of 220 million used car salesmen
with all the money we need to buy guns
and no qualms at all
about killing anybody else in the world
who tries to make us uncomfortable."
- Hunter S. Thompson
"Seeing you in a hole in the ground
reminds me of this dream I keep having."
- "Father of the Pride"
Correspondent:: König Prüß, GfbAEV
Date: Mon, 03 Jan 2005 07:49:32 GMT
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HellPope Huey wrote:
>
> I thought everyone realized the first and last action of any Church
>activity was to be fucked like you were a Nerf vagina soaked in hash
>oil. I was never a Catlick, so my first unrighteous boning took place
>when I was 5 and a drunken department store Santa peed on ME. It went
>downhill from there, then up again when I was recruited by Dobbs, then
>down when I realized that roughly half of the "Heirarchy" saved their
>urine in jars and the other half filled their water guns with it. Oh
>well, that's Religion for you.
>
> Praise Jack Shit and stop kidding yourself. Its a HOBBY and all too
>suspiciously like storing your porno in a box that has a package of
>lunchmeat in it because the scent magnifies the experience for you after
>its ripened for a few days. Connie Kali Out-Are-In-Dutch.
>
P-s-s-st!
(what kind of lunchmeat?)
Correspondent:: HellPope Huey
Date: Mon, 03 Jan 2005 16:58:09 GMT
--------
In article
,
König Prüß, GfbAEV wrote:
> HellPope Huey wrote:
> >
> > I thought everyone realized the first and last action of any Church
> >activity was to be fucked like you were a Nerf vagina soaked in hash
> >oil. I was never a Catlick, so my first unrighteous boning took place
> >when I was 5 and a drunken department store Santa peed on ME. It went
> >downhill from there, then up again when I was recruited by Dobbs, then
> >down when I realized that roughly half of the "Heirarchy" saved their
> >urine in jars and the other half filled their water guns with it. Oh
> >well, that's Religion for you.
> > Praise Jack Shit and stop kidding yourself. Its a HOBBY and all too
> >suspiciously like storing your porno in a box that has a package of
> >lunchmeat in it because the scent magnifies the experience for you after
> >its ripened for a few days. Connie Kali Out-Are-In-Dutch.
> >
> P-s-s-st!
> (what kind of lunchmeat?)
The traditional choice for a SubG venture would OBVIOUSLY be baloney,
but I have found that honey ham smells like Connie after a while,
whereas salami smells like Stang's boots and corned beef smells like a
new car if placed under plumper porn. Odd thing, that. So are you.
--
HellPope Huey
A lurking tsunami in every hot tub,
a budding conspiracy in every sock drawer,
a potential holocaust in every birth control dispenser.
Are you bored? Are you jaded?
Has all enthusiasm faded?
Are you one of those people like glazed fruit
Who sit there in shell shock
Till the dot on your screen
disappears?
- Creme & Godley, "L"
My mind is a swamp
glutted with the wreckage
of ancient sitcom gags.
- Nenslo
Correspondent:: König Prüß, GfbAEV
Date: Mon, 03 Jan 2005 18:10:03 GMT
--------
HellPope Huey wrote:
>In article
>,
> König Prüß, GfbAEV wrote:
>> HellPope Huey wrote:
>> >
>> > I thought everyone realized the first and last action of any Church
>> >activity was to be fucked like you were a Nerf vagina soaked in hash
>> >oil. I was never a Catlick, so my first unrighteous boning took place
>> >when I was 5 and a drunken department store Santa peed on ME. It went
>> >downhill from there, then up again when I was recruited by Dobbs, then
>> >down when I realized that roughly half of the "Heirarchy" saved their
>> >urine in jars and the other half filled their water guns with it. Oh
>> >well, that's Religion for you.
>> > Praise Jack Shit and stop kidding yourself. Its a HOBBY and all too
>> >suspiciously like storing your porno in a box that has a package of
>> >lunchmeat in it because the scent magnifies the experience for you after
>> >its ripened for a few days. Connie Kali Out-Are-In-Dutch.
>> >
>> P-s-s-st!
>> (what kind of lunchmeat?)
>
> The traditional choice for a SubG venture would OBVIOUSLY be baloney,
>but I have found that honey ham smells like Connie after a while,
>whereas salami smells like Stang's boots and corned beef smells like a
>new car if placed under plumper porn. Odd thing, that. So are you.
>
Funny, that! I attribute the "new car smell" to my diet which is high in acrylics.
I also figured that why the dogs are continually chasing me and trying to pee
on my tires; that being to have their scent carried over a larger area than they
themselves can either cover or reasonably defend. Or it may simply be a direct
response to the scent of the corned beef, which wasn't always lean although
I specified. But if it were just that, the dogs would be trying to pee on my tires.
Correspondent:: Artemia Salina
Date: Mon, 03 Jan 2005 13:26:40 -0500
--------
On Mon, 03 Jan 2005 16:58:09 +0000, HellPope Huey wrote:
> In article
> ,
> König Prüß, GfbAEV wrote:
>> P-s-s-st!
>> (what kind of lunchmeat?)
>
> The traditional choice for a SubG venture would OBVIOUSLY be baloney,
I would've thought head cheese.
PS: Is it true that Braunschwieger is German for "Brain sausage"?
--
0:-) 0:-) 0:-) 0:-) (-:0 (-:0 (-:0 (-:0
0:-) Artemia Salina (-:0
0:-) Surrounded by Angels (-:0
0:-) 0:-) 0:-) 0:-) (-:0 (-:0 (-:0 (-:0
Correspondent:: "angelicusrex"
Date: Mon, 3 Jan 2005 12:22:55 -0700
--------
Braun means "strong" So it is strong sausage. THE STRONG MEAT OF BOB! That
you are looking for.
Archimandrite Pudlevitcz Top Posting since 1997!
"Artemia Salina" wrote in message
news:pan.2005.01.03.18.26.40.28661@sheayright.com...
> On Mon, 03 Jan 2005 16:58:09 +0000, HellPope Huey wrote:
>
>> In article
>> ,
>> König Prüß, GfbAEV wrote:
>
>>> P-s-s-st!
>>> (what kind of lunchmeat?)
>>
>> The traditional choice for a SubG venture would OBVIOUSLY be baloney,
>
> I would've thought head cheese.
>
> PS: Is it true that Braunschwieger is German for "Brain sausage"?
>
> --
> 0:-) 0:-) 0:-) 0:-) (-:0 (-:0 (-:0 (-:0
> 0:-) Artemia Salina (-:0
> 0:-) Surrounded by Angels (-:0
> 0:-) 0:-) 0:-) 0:-) (-:0 (-:0 (-:0 (-:0
>
Correspondent:: "rev_cletus"
Date: Wed, 05 Jan 2005 01:40:01 GMT
--------
"HellPope Huey" wrote in message
news:NoRestraint-0AD219.23192802012005@news1.west.earthlink.net...
>
> Praise Jack Shit and stop kidding yourself. Its a HOBBY and all too
> suspiciously like storing your porno in a box that has a package of
> lunchmeat in it because the scent magnifies the experience for you after
> its ripened for a few days. Connie Kali Out-Are-In-Dutch.
It's at *this* point that *I* started goin'
THUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMP...*spoik*
Tanx, Hooey; whadda I owe ya'?
--
rev_c
.sig thinkin' carrots...and a rilly *beeg* Cubano blount...
Correspondent:: HellPope Huey
Date: Wed, 05 Jan 2005 03:08:38 GMT
--------
In article ,
"rev_cletus" wrote:
> "HellPope Huey" wrote in message
> news:NoRestraint-0AD219.23192802012005@news1.west.earthlink.net...
> >
> > Praise Jack Shit and stop kidding yourself. Its a HOBBY and all too
> > suspiciously like storing your porno in a box that has a package of
> > lunchmeat in it because the scent magnifies the experience for you after
> > its ripened for a few days. Connie Kali Out-Are-In-Dutch.
>
> It's at *this* point that *I* started goin'
> THUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMPTHUMP...*spoik*
> Tanx, Hooey; whadda I owe ya'?
Well, to be honest, see the part where it says "Jack Shit" again, but
if you really wanted to just be nice and kill 3 out-of-town people for
me, that'd be really swell and I'd, like, send you neat stuff in the
mail for a while afterwards.
--
HellPope Huey
No good deed goes unpunned.
Somewhere between the Angels and the French
lies the rest of humanity.
- Mark Twain
"Oh, you hate your job?
Why didn't you say so?
There's a support group for that;
its called 'Everybody'
and they meet at the bar."
- Drew Carey