MORE CHURCH BULLETIN BLOOPERS

**Scouts are saving aluminum cans, bottles and other items to be recycled.
Proceeds will be used to cripple children.

**The choir will meet at the Larsen house for fun and sinning.

**Miss Charlene Mason sang, "I Will Not Pass This Way Again," giving
obvious pleasure to the congregation.

**Ladies, don't forget the rummage sale. It is a good chance to get rid of
those things not worth keeping around the house. Bring your husbands.

**Next Sunday is the family hayride and bonfire at the Fowlers. Bring your
own hot dogs and guns. Friends are welcome! Everyone come for a fun time.

**Smile at someone who is hard to love. Say "hell" to someone who doesn't
care much about you.

**The peace-making meeting scheduled for today has been canceled due to a
conflict.

**Tonight's sermon-"What is hell?" Come early and listen to our choir
practice.

**The sermon this morning: Jesus Walks on the Water The sermon tonight:
Searching for Jesus.

**Next Thursday, there will be tryouts for the choir. They need all the
help
they can get.

**The agenda was adopted...the minutes were approved...the financial
secretary gave a grief report.

**Barbara C. remains in the hospital and needs blood donors for more
transfusions. She is also having trouble sleeping and requests tapes of
Pastor Jack's sermons.

**The 'Over 60s Choir' will be disbanded for the summer with the thanks of
the entire church.

**Missionary from Africa speaking at Calvary Memorial Church in Racine:
Name: Bertha Belch.
Announcement: "Come tonight and hear Bertha Belch all the way from
Africa."

**Announcement in a church bulletin for a National Prayer & Fasting
Conference: "The cost for attending the Fasting & Prayer conference
includes meals."

In church this past Sunday, we celebrated Communion.
During the "children's sermon", the minister was talking about Communion
and what it is all about. "The Bible talks of Holy Communion being a
'joyful feast'. What does that mean? Well, 'joyful' means happy, right?
And
a feast is a meal. So a 'joyful feast' is a happy meal. And what are the
three things we need for a happy meal?" The little boy sitting in front
raised his hand and said, "Hamburger, fries, and a regular soft drink?"

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