Hatred. A Sermon.

by Rev. Andrew Matthews (saint@prairienet.org)
Date: Wed, 14 Jun 1995

Excerpt from OGYR NETWORK: Series 4, Issue #3. Summer, '95 Edition. (C)1995 OGYR NETWORK. (K)1995. All Rites Reversed Five Times.

"Why hate anyone for their race, religion, color, or creed when there are so many real reasons to hate people?" - Emo Phillips. E = mo2

"Y'know, hate is really what most religions are about. We're just the only one to come right out and say it." - Rev. Ivan Stang (paraphrased). Arise!

Greetings, Bretheren....

Two quotes to chew, swallow, digest, and excrete. What more can be said? I've just about had it with humans hating each other for superficial reasons. I'm tired of ego-centric views where people only wish to one-up each other, boosting their egos by stepping on as many others as they can. I'm sick and tired of hearing childish bickering, adolescent whining, and immature crying from those who demand respect and reverance. I won't even give them the time of day. In this age, on the verge of global awareness, we should be ascertaining new levels of hatred, new peaks of dislike.

I proclaim myself to be one of this "new breed of haters". And, I'm damn proud of it. I can even be considered "politically correct", not that I cared. You see, children, I am cultivating a global hatred to go right along with this new global community. I hate everyone equally. I hate each and every person with the same passion as I would bestow love upon any of my current deities. I AM A HUMAN RACIST. I hate the entire human race, part, parcel, and whole!

I hate specific people, groups of people, clics of people, masses of people, nations of people, continents of people. I don't need any other reason for my prejudice except that they are all part of the human race. I'm sick of them! I'd tell them to go back to where they came from, but that wouldn't do anything, obviously. I'd suggest a complete genocide, but I'm definitely the minority in this matter! It enrages me to think that I am powerless to act upon this churning hate that fuels my very soul!

But why be limited to humans, I must ask myself. Why be species-specific? In order to continue the evolution of this hatred, I must willfully and completely devote myself to hating more. I must hate every form of life on this planet! Humans, pshaw! Alone, they are barely worth my consideration. I must hate animals, vegetation, bacteria, and virii! Everything from the common cold and the amoeba to the giant whale I must despise. From the lowest algae to the mighty oak tree. Everything that consumes anything at all, I must hate with my mind, heart, and soul.
Wonderful! I now hate everything living on the planet. But why stop there? Why not push the boundaries back just a little more, expand my horizons of hatred to include all physical matter, both constructed and natural! I must hate buildings of all sorts, hate plains, mountains, oceans, lakes, sky and earth, the very components of matter that make up this cosmic pit-stop of a planet! Every single atom known, and all those which have yet to be discovered... Hate! Hate! Hate! Hate! Hate!

Which brings up another limit. I'm only dealing in three dimensions. Why should my view of hatred be so limited? I should hate specific events, both in the past and in the future. I should hate everything the Big Bang and the End Splurt, and every single moment of conceivable time in between the two! Ah, I feel my hate swelling in my heart. I am starting to grasp what it means. I am starting to merge with the concept of hatred...

Concepts! By the left scrotum of J.R. "Bob" Dobbs, I should hate ideas as well! I should not only hate life, I should hate the concept of life. I shouldn't just hate all matter, I should hate the laws that bind it! I shouldn't just hate all moments of time, I should hate time and all other dimensions in and of themselves as well! I must hate the essence of thought, of imagination, of anything created in the mental or spiritual plane! Gods and goddesses, devils and spirits and angels, from the first primal urge to Einstein's theory of relativity, I must hate it all! I must hate the words that I am writing, the thoughts that drive it, I must even hate hate itself! I must hate everything and nothing! I must completely give myself over to hating every single possible thing there is to hate. If I can think of it, I must hate it. Even if I can't think of it, I must hate it!

This is the true way to hatred. And this is why all other forms of hate pale in comparison. They're all simply incomplete slivers of the Big Picture (which, incidently, I also despise with a passion). I have figured out the key! And now, I pass this secret unto you, children. Do not breath another word of namby-pamby wanna-be hate until you have converted yourself into this whole-universal form of hatred. I don't even want to hear it. Just don't even start. But, convert yourself away from your behind-the-times attitude and embrace the NEW hatred as I have, and I shall truly hate you for it.

Hate, my friends. My dear, despisable friends. Hate is the solution. We just haven't been hating nearly ENOUGH lately. We're lazy. And, if there is one thing I hate, it's laziness.

"But the only thing you can't hate is the inflatable Richard M. Nixon doll..." - Scott Free Detergent

Ah, I new there was a glitch in there somewhere...

Kill me,

$aint @ndrew, ksc

OGYR NETWORK ONLINE

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$aint @ndrew, KSC. Campus Chaplain of Miskatonic University. Ogyr Network. contact: snail-mail = PO BOX 53, PLAINFIELD, IL. 60544 email: saint@firefly.prairienet.org or saint_andrew@anl.gov www: http://www.paranoia.com/coe/resources/saint.html

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