THE NEW, REVISED SUBGENIUS CORRUPTION TEST

(originally posted by Friday Jones, edited and enlarged by nu-monet and ICEKNIFE)

1) How much will you pay me to pass this test?

2) What would you pay to keep your family out of
danger?

3) Would you be willing to have sex with a stranger
for money?

4) Would you be willing to have sex with several
strangers at the same time for money?

5) Would you mind if I set #4 up for you, say,
tonight?

6) If I kept you supplied with drugs, would you do
favors for me?

7) Do you know what chloral hydrate smells like?
Ether?

8) Would you object to giving this envelope to that
policeman over there?

9) Have you ever wanted to be a movie star?

10) What about a direct-to-video star?

11) What about a direct-to-video not legal for sale
in the United States, it's Territories or Possessions star?

12) Would you be willing to relocate to the Carribean

for a job in banking? Just making deposits, really.

13) Have you ever considered getting a lot of tattoos?
Body piercings? Cosmetic surgery?

14) Without training, would you consider giving tattoos,
body piercings, and cosmetic surgery to others?

15) Do you know what the word "extradition" means?

16) Would you apprentice to an OB/GYN physician in
Mexico?

17) One who doesn't have a valid medical license?

18) Do you have any unusual fear of radiation?
Snakes?

19) What is the most unusual meat you have ever
eaten?

20) Have you ever woken up in your own vomit and
feces?

21) Would you be willing to change you religious
beliefs to something a little more ancient?

22) Something involving stone altars and animal
sacrifice?

23) Something involving stone altars and human
sacrifice?

24) Have you ever fired a high-powered rifle with
a scope?

25) Do you believe in vampires?

26) Would you like to know for sure?

27) How many civic groups are you a member of?

28) Who are you informing on them to?

29) Does wearing a tie give you comfort and
solace?

30) Does wearing a tie like other people wear
a tie give you comfort and solace?

31) Do you summer in Innsbruck?

32) Are you known to the police there?

33) Do you prefer Mormons as personal assistants?

34) Large, oiled, Samoan Mormons?

35) Did you cry when they sold the Bohemian Club?

36) Ever sell nude photos of a relative without
their consent?

37) Do small cute furry creatures make you angry
just by being cute? Would you mind stepping on them in high heels?

38) Do you regard your genitals as friendly
competitors, or "The devil's automotive
repair shop waiting room"?

39) Do the words "venture capital" make you
horny?

40) What about "arachnid" or "pumpkin"?

41) Do you often describe others as "losers"?
To their face?

42) Do people who fail to validate your choices
enrage you? Validate you parking?

43) Can you *prove* the "environment" is in a
third world country, NOT here?

44) Do you hate others who haven't suffered as
much as you? Will you show them?

45) Do you have friends who aren't work
associates? Do they know where you live?

46) Would you turn your dying mother in for
illegal drug use?

47) Would you turn her in if there was a reward?
After you planted drugs on her?

48) Do you have a degree in poly-sci, pre-law,
or law?

49) What "unimpeachable authorities" do you
align with?

50) From whom do you take your orders?

51) Do you need underlings to feel overish?

52) Does being mindless, spineless, and pointless
ever bother you?

53) Is getting a paycheck almost as nice as a
warm teat full of milk?

54) Are you absolutely certain that all higher
emotions, motives and beings are mythical?

55) Were you always a coward, or did something
bad happen? If you are not a coward now
would you be willing to become one?

56) Do individualists frighten and anger you?

57) Are you painfully ticklish?

58) Do you enjoy taking tests of this kind?

59) Giving tests of this kind?

60) Cheating on, fudging, marking down others,
or compiling dossiers from tests of this kind?

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Original file name: The SubGenius Corruption Te - converted on Friday, 29 June 2001, 22:34

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