A Day Riddled with Conspiracy Shit

By slapbuddha@aol.com (SlapBuddha)
Date: 10 May 1996

Why must the Conspiracy be so mockingly OBVIOUS? It doesn't even bother
to conceal itself. Why should it? Nobody gives a shit anyway. Here's
how my day started: I get mail from Radio Shack, they "pre-approved" me
for $500 credit. Whoopee, sez I, since I don't expect to see anything but
money in theory for the rest of my life, might as well go out and spend
money I don't and won't ever have. Well, I buy my toys, some recording
essentials and a portable CD player, for these items they ask if I would
like to buy the warranty, which is over 50% the cost of the item in
question. WELL, it's obvious where THEY'RE making a profit. I've bought
Radio Shack Shit before, I know how shoddy it is. NOW I see how all along
it BENEFITS these soulless Pinks to make their products so untrustworthy.
Well, I hate to be SO SELFISH, but WHAT THE FUCK ABOUT ME?? I need
electronic equipment for my creative and appreciative SURVIVAL. Do you
want money so bad that you will make it impossible for me to satisfy these
needs? Apparantly. And I KNOW that the world is basically full of dull
minded shitmonkeys that would appreciate the money making scam Radio Shack
has going on than anything AESTHETIby the lovely offering of money I don't
have (and never will).
OK instance number TWO. I head to a local coffee house to do some
reading and get out of my house. I have about 8 quarters, enough for a
coffee and a refill. I already knew this place had recently been bought
out by Pink boys, and is quickly becoming just another bar. Well at the
door they request that I give them my 8 quarters, so that I might have the
PRIVILEDGE to sit and listen to some schmuck with his acoustic guitar play
Bye Bye Miss American Pie. FUCK A BUNCH OF THAT!!! I supposed to pay for
that annoyance? I'd rather watch him wretch from freshly swallowed
Drano. Yet another feeble burnt offering to the decayed god of supposed
culture. Money making is the only living aesthetic in the Con's eye.
It's time to kill.

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