Snapshots by Rev. Ivan Stang
I was SUPPOSED to stay in Dallas, learning graphics programs like Bryce 2, but instead we took off for Malaysia for another jaunt to the SubGenius Fortress of Solitude and cult encampment known as Dobbstown. It could more accurately be called DobbsLAND, or Dobbslandia, as I'm sure you'll agree once you see the amazing spray-painting jobs that the Bobbies have done on the natural canyons, mountains and islands of the area -- not to mention the Pyramid!
Luckily, I remembered to bring my trusty Kodak, and snapped some lovely pictures of the people and places around Dobbstown. I am so happy to be able to share these with you.
I made these into relatively high-res JPEGs for your viewing pleasure and downloading agony. (They're all from 83k to 149k.) However, I for one think they're worth it. SOME people would consider this the very sickest, most obsessive kind of pornography -- and I'M ONE OF 'EM!!
I should mention that these pictures would not have been possible without the unwitting help of St. Paul Mavrides and Rev. Kenneth Huey, who did the two color Dobbshead portraits used in the outlandish graffitti reproduced all over Dobbstown. I did end up using that Bryce program some, also.
Incidentally, the background image on this page is by Dr. Howll Robins and was seamless-tile-ified by Atom FunWay Plastico.
I have placed my personal favorite shots at the top, but variations on the themes follow.
ALONG THE TRAIL TO DOBBSTOWN
Apparently the Dobbstown Exterior Decorating crew uses some sort of machine to paint the Huey Photorealistic Dobbshead on the ground everywhere. Don't even ASK me how they get that holo on the MOON, though! (It only looks that way once you get within about a 10 mile radius of Dobbstown.) The big thing looming in the background is not an iceberg, but some sort of gigantic crystal.
The Dobbs Islands have never looked so placid, nor the giant tinfoil logo so shiny.
ON THE RIVER APPROACHING THE TEMPLE
Imagine how many $30 SubGenius memberships went into the spray paint ALONE that it took to render these canyons in Dobbsheads! Some may argue that they looked better in their natural state... but SOME are DEAD now, aren't they?? The Dobbstown Temple can be seen looming in the background.
SOME PRETTY ROCKS
A lovely view of some rock formations just outside the Dobbstown Gates. Incredible paint job on the rocks. The huge torus or donut-shaped thing on the left is a sort of hovering security satellite that can "see" visitors as they enter -- even though it has no eyes!
LATE AFTERNOON ON THE DOBBSTOWN TRAIL
Another view of the same area, from further up the trail in the late afternoon. Notice how the needle-like rock formations have been carved away in the valley below to make a landing strip for choppers, which is how you first get in. (From there, you have to hike or ride donkeys, and take a canoe up to the Gates.)
DOBBS' PRIVATE ISLANDS OFF THE COAST OF MALAYSIA
We plan to put hotels and casinos on most of these. The natives have already been relocated. (Don't worry, they were WELL paid!) Dobbs won't let anyone venture onto the really big islands, though -- supposedly he keeps some sort of menagerie of animals there. The huge Church logo was hand-chainsawed from a gigantic wad of tinfoil by Rev. Huey's crew.
A BILLBOARD FOR THE CHURCH...
Some would say it mars this otherwise beautifully gardened landscape. But commerce is important too. SCREW the eco-nuts!
""BOB" LOVES YOU" CARVED FROM AN ICEBERG
These efforts don't last long in the Malaysian heat, but they sure keep the Bobbies busy. The technology used to "levitate" these structures is understood by only a few of our top scientists.
THE UNDERWATER TEMPLE OF DOBBS
We've only had one of these built so far. Getting in and out via minisub is a bitch, and there have been leaks. The rugs inside the pyramid are all stained and smell like fish. But it does make for an impressive snapshot! The spiky corals are native to Malaysian offshore reefs. Note that the security satellite has followed us even here. (This is snapped from the mini-sub's window.)
FURTHER UP THE DOBBSTOWN RIVER
Check out the weird thing they've done with the eyes spray-painted on the cliffs to the left! This shot gives you a sense of the truly vast size of the Dobbstown Temple Pyramid, which looms in the background like a mountain.
A CHURCH LOGO CREATED ENTIRELY FROM SHAVING CREAM
HIDEOUS ONCOMING SCARY DOBBSHEADS! DON'T LOOK TOO LONG!
Fooled ya... these are just the Dobbs Islands shot from directly above, from a helicopter, through an EXTEREMLY wide-angle lens!
THE GATE TO DOBBSTOWN
...seen from above. The temple is not Dobbstown per se but is only the GATE to Dobbstown.
AFTER AN INDUSTRIAL ACCIDENT at the DOBBS ISLANDS SITE
Well, these things do happen. There was some sort of "spill" from the 'Frop Packaging Factory and it did kill quite a few fish, dolphins, whales, etc... but what a nice souvenir photo!
ALMOST TO DOBBSTOWN
Shot from the plane approaching the landing strip. Notice the SNOW (!) piled up at the base of the center canyon. Nobody's been able to explain that yet. The average temperature outdoors in this area is about 110 degrees!
ANOTHER ARTISTIC ICEBERG
This was a lucky shot. Notice the tremendous asteroid tearing its way into the atmosphere! Luckily it mostly burned up on entry and only killed a few Burmese.
The pictures which follow are mostly variations on the previous shots, but we offer them here to students of photography who may glean from them some sense of just when to QUIT.
We hope you enjoy these vistas, and plan to bring you more in virtual moving real 3D time reality VR. Later.