From: nu-monet <email@example.com>
Date: Sun, Apr 2, 2000 12:34 PM
I'm glad I heal quick from the morbid depression of having to come
back to the U.S. I guess I am more *inured* to Nasty-Nelly Copheads
who stay up nights *terrified* that someone will smoke 'Frop, read
their own mail, or otherwise *not* work for the CON.
I will gladly give others the opportunity to revile you with the tales
of how I tried to become a close, personal friend of every whore in
the city (except the spitters); how everyone in A-damn was wondering:
WHO THE FUCK IS THIS "BOB" GUY AND WHERE CAN I GET SOME? and WHY
DO THESE WEIRDOS SEEM TO ALWAYS GET THE BEST DRUGS?; plus a million
other unasked questions by those who have not seen
*>* THE PROMISED LAND *<*
(sobb!) I wanna go BACK, they can't MAKE me LEAVE! It's NOT FAIR,
I tell you! I have seen the lowest circle of SubGenius HEAVEN!
My penii are STILL ERECT with the merest memory of Dharmadam.
Can I tell you of the magnificant SexHurt(tm)?
Of the STUPENDOUS rants which drove crowds of wooden-shoe eating
Dutch and other zoinkers MAD with confusion, rage, lust, and the
desire to found a minor political parties opposed to the WTO and
icky-tasting Belgium Cherry beer?
Of DAMN good looking Straat-Hoores who will even get ORGASMIC
for a slight additional charge, which is still a bargain at the
fucking unreal exchange rate? Of how they will invite you back
to their place for some serious snorking, if you ask nice and
just put down the riding crop?
Of your fellow Yetisyny gazing at der blinkenlights as they stagger,
stiff-legged and in awe from drugs NEVER MEANT for consumption by
ANYONE who doesn't want their conscienceness raised ONE IOTA, as
they RE-PAINT Van Gokes "Flowers" with their eyeballs?
Of taking a canal boat to the hemp museum before realizing that
you are on the GODDAMN MUTHER-FUCKING COCK-SUCKING PLANE BACK
TO THE U.S. LET ME OFF YOU BASTARDS DO THESE WINDOWS OPEN LET
GO OF ME YOU FUCKING ASSHOLES WHERE ARE MY LEGS AND QUIT TRYING
TO GIVE ME A HANDJOB YOU LUCIOUS 16-YEAR-OLD ASIAN GIRL WHO KEEPS
PLAYING WITH STUFF ON HER TONGUE AND RUBBING HER NIPS WHILE
TELLING ME SHE IS REALLY A TRANSRACIAL BRITNEY SPEARS!
I must maintain.
I must remember that HELL is a cold, unfriendly place, full of
offended merehumes and harsh, unthinking slacklessness, and the
only way of dealing with it is is thru "Bob".
Oh, fuck it. Kill me.
Subject: Re: 1st Amster-After-Action
From: Name: PopeBlack <firstname.lastname@example.org>
Date: Mon, Apr 3, 2000 4:05 PM
In article <email@example.com>,
firstname.lastname@example.org (Sterno) wrote:
> In article <38E776AE.D78@succeeds.com>, email@example.com wrote:
> Thanks a LOT for that 21-year-old Scotch, Doktor Nu-Monet! Great way
> start the day in A-dam, bro!
> - Rev. Sterno
> Yeah same goes here. That Courvassier was good too. Thanks.
His divine grace,
The Second Luckiest Man Alive!
The Apostle Pope General Dr. Mighty David Lee Black THC MMDA
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