The young man seen standing cave-man-like next to me at the Pulpit has just finished drinking not one, not two, but THREE cups of his own urine. He had never done anything like that before this night.

I had gotten tired of ranting and had started looking to the crowd for enthusiastic drunken young would-be evangelists... this guy showed promise and in fact spoke not too ineloquently about the upcoming End of the World, etc. But he HAD been drinking a lot of beer. After about 5 minutes of ranting, he suddenly had to pee badly, so he used his empty cup while standing there at the large Pulpit -- something I have been tempted to do but never DID. He stood regarding his cupfull of glistening pale pee, said something like, "I've never done this before, and it'll probably kill me, but what the hell, THE WORLD ENDS... TOMORROW!" And he swigged that pee right down. Kind of paused for a minute and said it wasn't bad.

Then he ranted some more, and soon needed to urinate again. I re-entered the auditorium just in time to see this man PEEING into a CUP with his dick pointed roughly at the PLUSH VELVET SIDES of our INCREDIBLY RARE HAND MADE ED-STRANGIAN PULPIT! I lakked to SHIT! (THAT might have been a good TOPPER, or TOPPING so to speak.)

But the lad's aim was true, and the Pulpit went territorially UNMARKED. He drank more pee and ranted some more... At about 1 am, Jesus and I literally dismantled the Pulpit into its component parts from underneath him.
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