Okay all...this is my letter. I must say the gathering at Brushwood in New York state was truly apocalyptic! Never has there been such a motely gathering of brilliant, bizarre and wonderful people as the 350 or so Subgenii, all together at the 150-acre, clothing optional campground that is Brushwood. (Truly frightening...Subgenii naked!)
It took two days, twelve hours a day to get up there, but mostly because the Rev. Stang had to stop and smoke frop at every rest area. Coming home, and NOT caravanning, we saved about 2.5 hours! But then, he has the ultimate slack. We set up our HUGE tent on Wed. morning and simply looked around. Ah, camping does NOT have to be uncomfortable...there were toilets, showers, a heated pool and a hot tub. Truly grand.
On Thursday, since we were only two hours away, a friend and I went up to Niagara Falls. One should go to the Canadian side, as they fall facing that direction. Truly awesome were they, beautiful to behold. That night was the Connieites night to have the Estrogen Brigade. Really, we only wanted to have a little slumber party, but the men were SO DAMNED concerned that we were plotting against them (why does everything HAVE to be about men in their minds? silly boys...) that they sat outside our tent, listening. We chased them off, and yet, they returned...by now the estrogen was flowing and we ran to the center of the dewy, misty field to escape them. We could see them coming out there, you understand. We ended up running about, raiding campsites, howling our frenzy to the moon, taking frop, alcohol, and food wherever we could find it, and spanking and terrorizing Bobbies along the way. When we tired of this, all 13 of us decided to hot tub. Well, well, well, turned out, out dear leader, the Rev. Stang was up there and in the best female impromptu fashion, we stripped him bare and tossed him to the pool. Of course, we did join him and so many missed out as they were standing around watching RANTERS. Ah, the TRUE slack is what's behind the scenes, n'est-ce que pas?
The next day was full of ranters and anti-music...a band called Einstein's Secret Orchestra played that evening...truly amazing to behold. Rev. Suzie the Floozie and I met and bonded instantly...she's been my Church idol for years and has asked me to fill in her shoes whenever necessary...truly I am honored. the blood wrestling was this day...fantastic stuff! men wrestled men, two women wrestled Pastor Craig...I must say this...everyone picks on him for his blatant geekiness, but he was the ONLY one with the BALLS to face two estrogen-empowered babes at once! Praise Pastor Craig! Stang was beaten, as usual, by yet another female...happens every year. I think he gives in just to feel the breasts of power smashing him into the mat.
Saturday was The Battle of Armageddon. Truly a spectacle. That was the only day it rained...a rather fine mist...all day until about 8pm. I watched from the sidelines...I wasn't about to get injured by some of the more HULKING Subgenii, like Father Legume and Rev. Strange. Friday Jones had shorts, legcovers and armbands and breasts bared, looked like a demented roller derby queen....she and Rev. Suzie, in her leotard with giant pussy (with TEETH) on it, guarded the totally passive approach-Stang, wrapped up in bubble wrap. A beautiful sight, indeed, the two females, viciously guarding their lord and master. Well, LORD, anyway. The Holocaustals and Ivangelicals battled it out, only to a rather tied-up ending. "Bob" evens things out yet again, understanding the need for both factions. I watched and got soaked and delighted in it all. By this time, I was completely slack and sex-filled (as the woods enervated my wood god, Doc Frop,) and was having the time of my life.
That evening was full of MORE slack, music, anti-music and ranting...PapaJoeMama was intense and brutal and to the point, as his rants usually are...the women stole the pig-head from the meat-cooking men...the Bobtism went well, I was dunked by Legume, Praise BOB....and later, the delicious Rev. Nickie offered me the drug of choice that weekend...mushrooms! Ah, we stayed up all night, ending up in Rev. Susie's campsight, with Doc Frop, Rev. Suzie's entourage and the darling, beautiful Onan Canobite, a more delightful companion we could not have asked for as he sang songs of joy, sadness and unrequited love by the campfire, even inducing a tear or two. At 6:30am, we dressed and headed out into the misty dawn fields, up to the podium, to greet X-Day at 7am, the time set by BOB.
It was SUCH a sight...Stang and entourage appeared in a freaking white limo that drove all over the campground first...much ranting ensued and then, the countdown. And of course, at 7am, the punchline...."Fuck 'em if they can't take a JOKE!" Turns out, the paper "Bob" wrote the magic phrase, "The world ends at July 5th, 1998, 7am." was to be read upside down and backward! Oh, that tricky "Bob". It ends in the year 8661!!!!!! Stang, of course, was "Bob's" scapegoat and ended up stripped, honeyed, feathered (bright, hot pink feathers,) and dumped into the pond!!! Humility, thy name is Stang. A hilarious morning was had by all, then many crawled off to sleep off the night.
Later that day, Doc Frop (Don, for those who don't know,) and I went driving abuot the stunning countryside, viewing Amish in carriages, deer, bunnies, ducks...it was so idyllic as to ALMOST be comical. A beautiful area of the US, if you've never been.
We left Monday morning and had an uneventful trip, listening to rant tapes and music bought from Subgenii. The Duke of Uke was particularly cool, as he played modern, hip tunes on a ukelele.
We arrived home exhausted, and yet, totally refreshed and ready to face our lives, yet again. Most Subgenii I know are all saying the same thing...it was good for the mind, body and soul to be in the country with others of our ilk.
Love to you all...and COME next year!
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