ALT.SLACK GENERIC RANT!

From: Peter Hipwell <petehip@cogsci.ed.ac.uk>

Date: Tue, 01 Jun 1999 20:23:15 +0100

Blah blah blah blah RANT blether SLIGHTLY ANNOYED blah blah
blah blah PARKING TICKET blah blah blah blah blah FUCKING
NORMALS AND PUT TOO MUCH PEPPER IN THEIR SOUP!!!!! blah blah
blah blah blah blah blah LOBSTER UP THE TAILPIPE blah blah.
Blah blah bletherty blah ASSJERK MUNCHWIPE blah blah I WATCH
10 HOURS OF TV EVERY DAY blah blah yaketty yaketty yak blah
blah KFC ASSJERK MUNCHWIPE blah blah blah "Bob" blah blah
witter blah blah FUCKED-UP HARD DISC blah blah blah TAXES
blah blah rabbit yak witter twitter bleat whine meow suck suck
suck yak blah BORING OBSESSION WITH A MINOR CELEBRITY blah
blah-de-blah blah ASSJERK MUNCHWIPE blah blah blah-yah yah
blah blah blah POLITICS blah RELIGION blah POLITICS blah
RELIGION blah POLITICS blah RELIGION blah NORMALS NORMALS
NORMALS NORMALS GOSH THEY'RE EVERYWHERE blah blah blah blah I
AM A SUPERIOR BEING blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah
blah blah blah WILLIAM SHATNER'S SINGING CAREER blah blah blah
I AM REALLY COOL blah blah blah yawp yawp SHRILL ANNOYING VOICE
blah yak blah yak blah yak "Bob" blah blah blah blah blah blah
KNITTING NEEDLES blah blah blah blah blah gab gab gab blah gab
gob gab gob yak yak yak MILTIARY SPENDING blah blah blah blah
blah blah blah blah PARANOID WIBBLING ABOUT CURRENT OR IMMINENT
TOTALITARIANISM blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah
blah blah blah blah blah blah blah LEGALISE DRUGS blah blah blah
blah blah blah blah blah WHEN WILL I EVER GET LAID blah blah
blah blah A = A blah blah blah SOCIALISED MEDICINE suckitty blah
yakkity blah blah blah HITLER blah blah THEY'RE EVERYWHERE yap
yap yap wibble yip blah blah blah blah I'm BORED blah blah blah
blah blah blah blah ALTHOUGH THEY'RE SUCCESSFUL I COULD HAVE
DONE IT MUCH BETTER, I HAD THE SAME IDEA 25 YEARS AGO blah blah
blah blah blah blah blah blah IT'S NOT FAIR blah blah yak yak
yak yak yak yak yak yak yak yak grunt poot humph WILLIAM
SHANTNER'S SINGING CAREER ASSJERK MUNCHWIPE blah blah blah blah
blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah ILITERATE blah blah
blah blah blah blah blah REALLY DUMB blah blah blah blah blah
blah blah blah blah blah blah I CARE A LOT blah MY HEART IS ON
MY SLEEVE blah blah HYPOCRITES blah blah blah blah blah blah
blah blah blah blah blah...

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: modemac@modemac.com (Modemac)
Newsgroups: alt.slack
Subject: Re: ALT.SLACK GENERIC RANT!

Hey, what about the TITS AND ASS?

--
First Online Church of "Bob"
http://www.modemac.com/

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Peter Hipwell <petehip@cogsci.ed.ac.uk>
Newsgroups: alt.slack

Modemac wrote:
>
> Hey, what about the TITS AND ASS?
>

And Epopt Reticulate wrote:

> besides you forgot blah PENIS blah VULVA blah ENGORGED blah
> OOZE SQUIRT blah.

I thought alt.slack's coverage of these items was fully covered
by:

a) LOBSTER UP THE TAILPIPE
b) ASSJERK MUNCHWIPE

and, of course, the always heart-wrenching, weep-inducing,
poignant, eloquent, and metaphorically touching

c) WHEN WILL I EVER GET LAID

YMMV.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: Epopt Reticulate <wessonXSPAM@aracnet.com>

Peter Hipwell wrote:
>
> Blah blah blah blah RANT blether SLIGHTLY ANNOYED blah blah
[...]

besides you forgot blah PENIS blah VULVA blah ENGORGED blah OOZE
SQUIRT blah.

...

one mans net to fish for the ever elusive coelacanth is another
mans idle macrame.

but you tell 'em.

e.r.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: David Tanstaafl <David@tanstaafl.cc>
Reply-To: David@tanstaafl.cc
Organization: 27th Church of Patent Medicine and Travelling Salesmen

> blah blah blah blah blah REALLY DUMB blah blah blah blah blah
> blah blah blah blah blah blah I CARE A LOT blah MY HEART IS ON
> MY SLEEVE blah blah HYPOCRITES blah blah blah blah blah blah
> blah blah blah blah blah...

Thanks alot asshole! Now I need to write a new rant for XX-day!

----------------------------------------------------------------------

From: HellPope Huey <Hueykins@troi.csw.net>

1) It was always my understanding that if you take in a reasonable
amount of lecithin, a useful dietary emulsifier extracted from our
friend wheat, it'll help keep the Shatner particles from gaining a
foothold on the walls of your arteries, clogging you up and sending
your ticker askew on the treadle.

2) Lobster is WAY too expensive to stuff up a tailpipe; you're
supposed to use a potato and a broomstick handle there. Putting a dead
SEA TURTLE in their BEDS, covering it with a quilt and turning the heat
ALL THE WAY UP, now THAT'S the TICKET!!!

3) I concur with Mumthra's cooking tips for puppies; Many of them grow
up to be city councilmen. Broil & baste, do your part.

"If you're hungry, I think there's some dried chicken soup here in my
beard."
"That's the worst thing I ever heard and I dip puppies in liquid
nitrogen for grins!"
-sez two action figures in the back of ToyFare magazine

HellPope Huey
"Threw up for 4 hours but NOW I'm FINE!(urp)"

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