On Thu. Apr 27, 1995, firstname.lastname@example.org told All:
isc> In all honesty (HA!) I was, quite inexplicably, able to open up the
> old Netscape :96 and start seeing things RIGHT. HOWEVER this isn't
> to say we don't still need that RAM upgrade. I can't go more than
> about 7 or 8 links in before the program starts to FREEZE UP. Also,
> I think most of you would rather see me spend the MAIL-ORDER money
> on a new STARK FIST print job and the DONATIONS on the RAM.
In case you hadn't noticed, there are two unspoken rules of computer use
-- unspoken because they tend to scare the normals and indicate that
computer scientists are really silicon sociologists, To wit:
1. Computer programs have to be stretched to fit. They tend not to work at
first, but will work after several tries. The hardware doesn't change, the
code doesn't change, but the behavior changes.
2. It takes a lot of computer power to perform artificial intelligence,
but every machine has artificial personality. It will do the previously
undoable if it is pleased. Talking nice to them pleases most of them.
Other than that, they have different characteristics.
When I was selling Apple hardware to Purdue, I was also the main support
gofer. Invariably, when someone would call with a problem, I would first
ask if they'd been talking mean to it. I suggested that they try talking
nice to the machine. Only one ever took the time to consider what I was
saying, a psychology professor. He thought for about 10 seconds and
apologized to the machine. It worked fine from then on.
> GOING TO SAVE THE UNIVERSE!!
My laundry is ready right now. Here it comes.
isc> OH CRAP! I have to go get the kids at school first.
You not send a saucer? Never mind, I can hear them. "Aw, dad, we don't
want to ride home in a saucer. None of our friends do that. It's so
* 2qwk! 1.26b3 * Do NOT look into laser with remaining eye..
Oh, yeah, and so everyone else can envy my good fortune, allow me to repeat
the e-mail I sent:
YES YES YES SLACK SLACK YES
DOBBSCUP DOBBSCUP SLACK SLACK
BOBBY IN THE MORNING WITH MY COFFEE GIVE ME COFFEE STIFFY
Got it today. Thanks.
email@example.com The Doctor is on.
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