Re: What goes up the Butt?

From: (father of thurses 3)
Newsgroups: alt.slack,
Subject: Date: Sat, 01 Jun 96

In article <>, (Pee Kitty) wrote:
"John Blackmer ( wrote:
": This week I was trying to take a shit in one of those outhouses that has
": only three walls, and I saw on of those prong-ear rabbits hopping by with
": thousands of worms coming out of it's butt, and they were twisting in a
sort of
": propeller motion which lifted the rabbit rather high into the air with
": every hop. There was also an eagle flying low under the trees, and it was
": kind of distracted by looking at a mouse that it was about to swoop down
": on, so when the rabbit leapt its ears went up the eagle's butt and the
": prongs got caught. The eagle was very perturbed by this and started
": flapping and squawking around trying to stay airborne while the rabbit
": kicked and also tried to get free. All this ruckus startled a snake that
": was sleeping on the branch of a tree above, and it fell down and landed
": with its head up the butt of the rabbit, and the beak of the eagle up its
": little snake butt. This knocked the trio out of the air and they began
": squirming about on the ground like some obscene chimera. Now my friend
": Malekai was feeding the goats and saw this happening, and Malachi feels
": it is his sacred duty to piss on any odd natural phenomenon he comes
": upon. So he walked over to the chimera and started taking down his pants
": to take a pee. When his boyfriend Josh saw this, he thought Malachi was
": trying to get the chimera to suck his dick, and he got real jealous. He
": grabbed one of the goats by the legs, walked over to where Malachi was
": getting ready to pee, swung the goat at him, and impaled him up the butt
": with the goat's horns, knocking him on top of the chimera just as he was
": starting to pee. His head went through the hole created by the triplicate
": ouroboros and into the butt of a Burrow-owl who had just emerged feet
": first from its den, and his pee went all over them all including Josh.
": This made Josh real mad, and he started taking down his pants to make
": Malachi suck his dick as payment. There was a bunch of horny old men
": standing over by the fence, who had been watching Josh and Malachi's firm
": young muscular bodies as they fed the goats, and when they saw Josh take
": his pants down they lost all control. They started running over there
": lickety split and making catcalls and breathin' heavy, but they were so
": horny they weren't watching where they were going, and they tripped and
": fell over sticks and roots and rocks, and landed each with his dick, head
": arms and legs each up a different person's butt, all in a pile on top of
": Malachi and Josh and all the animals.
": Then they just lay there confused, all groaning and twitching and looking
": a giant machine made out of arms and legs and butts, and I just couldn't
": help myself. I started laughing and I couldn't stop. I laughed and
": laughed till I thought I would choke on my own tongue sitting there on
": the shitter. I laughed so hard I farted the biggest fart I ever laid. And
": I don't know exactly what happened, the fart must have caused a chain
": reaction with all the old moldering composty shit down there that hadn't
": been turned over in months, because it blew up.
": The impact blew all the composted gas in the whole shitter up into my
": asshole, making me bloated like a sumo wrestler for a moment and my
": asshole wide as a cavern. It also knocked me clean off the seat and into
": the air, spun me around and landed me on top of the whole pile, ass
": cheeks so wide the whole thing went up my ass, with only the goat's legs
": sticking out.
": Short mountain is many miles from any phone or hospital, and I wouldn't
": fit in the car anymore, so I had to walk the whole way to the hospital
": using the goat's legs like some modern version of a butt-centaur. It was
": the most traumatic, painful and embarassing experience of my whole life.
": Yours sincerely,
": Daedalus Damocletian QPM
"FUCKING STOP IT! We only have enough room for ONE STERNO! If you're gonna
"keep this up, you two have to duel it out. Period.

This has now been crossposted in, where it shoild be well

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