David Pretre
Eons ago on the ruined world of Gemni Leone, there stood a city named Endersgift. It was positioned on the peninsula of a sea that had long since dried, so looking out from it one saw a colossal cliff followed by a vast, flat wasteland that continued out to the horizon. The houses that made up Endersgift were similar architecturally to those of Earth's Victorian age. The main difference was that all of the buildings were covered with stainless steel, a precaution designed to make them resistant to the dark smoke that billowed out of their factories day and night. People lacked the energy and inclination to go out and wash their houses, though, so the grit and grime grew thicker and darker with every passing year. The soot that didn't fall down upon the houses rose up into the sky, sometimes so thickly that it was difficult to tell night from day.
In the center of Endersgift stood the Town Hall. It was a massive building from which five towers rose. Four thin spires reached up from the corners, each capped with a chimney. A more squat tower stood in the middle, upon which a giant clock was mounted. The clock had stopped a long time ago at two minutes until midnight, but no one had ever thought to have it fixed, or perhaps no one had even noticed that it was broken at all. The the Town Hall was surrounded with layers of barbed wire and electrical fences, and was patrolled constantly by packs of two hundred pound trained attack dogs. Inside lived the mayor of Endersgift, Mr. Miestermaster.
One day Mr. Miestermaster felt anxious. As he sat on his throne, his large folds of fat seemed to make him one with the age old wood. His warty fingers twitched and fiddled with the ornate armrests, slid over grooves in the wood that betrayed that this was a nervous habit he had acquired some time ago. His small, dark eyes flicked over to the huge television set that stood in front of him on a stand of gold. The television had no nob to change channels, for the only channel in Endersgift was channel six. As always, the announcer was Sweet Ease.
"...And coming up," Sweet Ease warbled happily, "we have psychic Madam Mysticio coming in to give her predictions for next season's fashions, so stay tuned!" Her image faded to a commercial which joyfully sang the praises of skin disease ointment.
"God, how I love this weather." Mumbled Mr. Miestermaster. "Muggy and hot today, muggy and hot yesterday, and it'll be muggy and hot tomorrow."
"Did you say something, suh?" asked Rosengloom, the mayor's advisor. Mr. Miestermaster couldn't see him, but he knew Rosengloom stood in the shadows which enveloped the corners of the room.
"No, just thinking out loud. Turn up the air conditioner. It's starting to get hot in here."
"Very good, suh." With the exception of certain very wealthy people, the mayor had one of the only operating air conditioners in the city.
The show had come back on, and a woman wearing a silk bandana on her head was talking.
"While this season grey has been all the rage," she chattered, "next season it's going to be black. So throw out all those grey clothes and get decked out in black, or you'll be the the only one on your block out of style!"
"Thank you, Madam Mystico, this program was brought to you by Gible and Greed tailors..." cut in Sweet Ease, but Mr. Miestermaster had already impatiently turned away from the television towards Rosengloom.
"This programming stinks, Rosengloom, and the people are bored. It's time they got something new to entertain them."
Rosengloom stepped out of the shadows. He was a tall man in a neatly pressed grey suit. His face was long and pale, and his eyes were concealed by round thick spectacles. His long black hair was tied back in a braided ponytail.
"Perhaps you should give them someone new to love, suh. Someone brave and happy, that they could look up to." suggested Rosengloom.
"No." grumbled Mr. Miestermaster, "We've saturated the population with role models who everyone wishes they could be, but no one emulates. We've given them beauties to ogle, sanctimonious baffoons to make them feel guilty, and warriors to respect. No, Rosengloom, the people don't need someone to love, they need someone to hate."
"Hmm...perhaps some neighboring country to come to odds with?" said Rosengloom.
"No...something small and easy. Something that I can destroy with one fell swoop. Something that will make me look good in front of my people."
"Ah. I have a suggestion, suh. How about the Snipe?"
Mr. Miestermaster thought for a moment.
"What the hell is a Snipe?"
"There are reputed to be a group of small, harmless, and timid creatures living in the Great Briar."
"Sounds perfect. Take me to my control room."
The wheels on the base of the throne squealed on their rusty spokes as Rosengloom pushed the mayor down a nearby hallway. At the end of the hallway stood a simple door of black iron. When they had reached it, Mr. Miestermaster pulled out a large, equally simple black iron key. A faint clang sounded as he turned the key in the lock, and the door swung open silently.
Inside stood the controls to the city. With its buttons, dials, and levers Mr. Miestermaster could control the city's temperature, weather, and just about any other conditions that it's people had to live under. He decided the availability of food and water, the number of equipment malfunctions, and the crime rate. From the speaker phones the could tell the police who to arrest, and channel six what to play. And, of course, one can't fail to mention The Big Red Button. No one knew how the inner workings of the controls functioned, for the technology had been lost.
Mr. Miestermaster picked up a speaker phone marked "6".
"This is control. " he said into the phone, "I want for you to reveal the greatest social menace to our society of this generation. Tell our viewers that the...umm-"
"Snipe, suh."
" Snipe, who live in the Great Briar, are causing property rates to go up, gas mains to break, and random muggings to increase. Imply that the Snipe are doing the mugging." He hung up the phone and chuckled. The television station didn't even know where his messages came from, they only knew they had to obey them or ill fortune would come their way. Humming a tune, the mayor of Endersgift began to adjust the controls to raise housing prices, limit gas availability, and increase the crime rate.
As an afterthought, he turned the heat outside up a notch.
Perhaps they'll even blame the weather on the Snipe, he thought.
"And as the Snipe problem becomes increasingly worse, one begins to wonder what actions our great mayor, Mr. Miestermaster, will take to eradicate it." said Sweet Ease merrily.
Oh, just wait and see, thought Mr. Miestermaster. The television's light flickered across his grey skin as The Mighty Lummox entered though the Town Hall's huge front door.
The Mighty Lummox stood a good ten feet tall, and carried about six hundred pounds of pure muscle. He was dressed in a pair of grey overalls, and wore a pair of giant combat boots. His face looked somewhat boyish, being covered with freckles and topped with curly, faintly red hair. He wielded a huge stone hammer.
"O Mighty Lummox," intoned Mr. Miestermaster, "I have summoned you here to ask you to help with this terrible Snipe problem--"
"Wat da hell ish a Shnipe?" boomed The Mighty Lummox.
Mr. Miestermaster sighed, his speech ruined.
"They're exceedingly dangerous creatures that live in the Great briar. All I ask is that you march into the briar, stomp on a few Snipe then go home and have some coco."
"Okay, shounds easy enough." said The Mighty Lummox and marched away, headed towards the briar.
The Great briar was the only part of Endersgift totally devoid of housing. The reason was simple enough. The briar was full of bramble bushes and thistle trees, plants that were based on silicon instead of carbon. Their unique molecular structure made them as sturdy as stone, yet flexible as plastic. Being practically indestructible, no one had been able clear them to make way for construction. Emanating from the dark grey plants were razor sharp thorns that ranged from two inches long to a few feet. The only thing capable of living in it's hundred yard diameter boundary were the Snipe.
The Snipe were indeed very small and quite fuzzy. To the untrained eye they would appear to be colorful balls of lint, a couple of millimeters in diameter. Upon inspection under a magnifying glass, one would see that they also had a tiny pair of legs and proportionately large eyes. There were green Snipe, yellow Snipe, and red Snipe. There numbered about two hundred Snipe total. All tended to be pretty quiet and inactive.
As The Mighty Lummox approached the Great briar the Snipe looked at one another questioningly, but remained silent.
"You damned Shnipe!" roared The Mighty Lummox, "You don't do nothin' but make trouble, and I ain't gonna put up wit it no more!"
With that The Mighty Lummox charged into the Great briar, swinging his mallet ferociously. It was bold and noble attempt, and he made it a full three feet in before completely decapitating and disemboweling himself.
"Interesting..." said Bob the Snipe, shifting a little on the outcropping thorn he was sitting on.
In the least fashionable district of the city, Olaf and Gwen sat watching their tiny black and white television. They didn't look at their filthy one room apartment, at their empty refrigerator, or their tattered beige clothes (which were about six seasons out of fashion). Their eyes stayed transfixed on the box of flickering images in front of them.
"...and so the pieces of The Mighty Lummox were taken to Miestermaster Memorial Hospital after a heated fight with the Snipe. News on more possibly Snipe related deaths after these messages..." came Sweet Ease's perpetually cheerful voice from the T.V. As the commercials came on neither Olaf or Gwen moved, but Olaf spoke.
"Someone's gatta do sometin' 'bout them Snipe."
The next month went poorly for Mr. Miestermaster. After the death of The Mighty Lummox he had sent all manor of nemesis against the Snipe, only to fail repeatedly. He had sent the police who had gotten into a four hour shootout with the Snipe, and had only succeeded in cracking a few thorns. Two officers had died from bullets bouncing back at them.
Television action star Bruce Stone then took up the cause, to the people's delight. Why, they thought, if Bruce Stone can't do it who can? They had seen him overcome all kinds of danger in the past. Bruce's ingenious plan was to trampoline himself into the middle of the briar with a knife clenched in his teeth and a gun gripped in each hand. Unfortunately, his assumption that the middle of the briar was hollow proved to be fatally wrong, and he was never heard from again. A foul smell began emanating from the briar, though. The Snipe were unaware of the smell, of course, being devoid of noses or any other smelling organ. They were also oblivious the next week when the entire briar was fumigated with stink gas.
Trying to set the briar on fire with flame throwers also proved to be ineffectual, seeing as how thistle trees and bramble bushes don't burn. With proper editing, though, some great looking battle footage was made by the news teams.
In their upper west side flat, Oliver and Gwenden (not to be confused with Olaf and Gwen who where, really, quite poor and wouldn't receive the time of day from such respectible people) watched as brave flame thrower crews battled the evil Snipe.
"Glad they're finally doing something about the bloody Snipe problem." commented Oliver when the commercials had come on, "I don't go work every bloody day just to have it ruined by a bunch of bloody Snipe who haven't worked a day in their bloody lives."
Oliver was proud of his job at the paper clip factory, proud of being able to live in a four room house, and damn bloody proud of being able to afford a wardrobe of new black clothing.
"Really, Oliver, such language." said Gwenden in a bored tone.
"Sorry, sweety shnookums, but I just hate immorality and think it should all be blown up."
The Snipe were gathered around the largest thistle tree in the briar. It had seemed appropriate for them to have a discussion about these strange people who kept coming to the briar and killing themselves, but no one knew how to begin.
"Perhaps they've mistaken us for someone else..." Suggested Doug The Snipe.
" Possible, but unlikely since they call us by name." replied Rick The Snipe.
Suddenly a seed fell out of the tree, and Doug had to jump to another thorn in order to dodge it. The seeds were constantly falling, giving the Snipe their only exercise. There was no wind in Endersgift, so the seeds could not spread outside of the boundaries of the briar. Thus the briar merely got gradually thicker and thicker, and the Snipe became smaller and smaller to accommodate their increasingly cramped conditions. They were unaware that soon they would either have to become microscopic or disappear altogether.
Across town Mr. Miestermaster sat in his throne, glaring at nothing in particular. These damn Snipe were a thorn in his side that he had not expected. He was sure that he looked bad in the eyes of the people. Something had to be done. Rosengloom's abrupt entrance startled him out of his melancholy.
"Suh, I believe someone from the private sector has a rather feasible idea of how to deal with the Snipe menace."
"Show him in."
A short, round man entered the room. He was dressed in workman's garb, and covered in thick layers of grey powder. He had a long beard and a grumpy scowl on his face, and upon his head rested a large, floppy hat.
"Suh, may I introduce Grex Hardcastle, owner of the Hardcastle construction company."
Grex grunted.
"Nice to meet you, Mr. Hardcastle," lied the mayor, "what is it that you propose?"
"Hmph. Well yer honor..." Grex loudly cleared his throat with a gravely sound, and removed his hat. "It's like this. Ya can't git in the briar, I's know 'cause I been tryin' fer years. So's what we should do is encase the whole damn thing in concrete and forget about it."
"My God," said Mr. Miestermaster, gripping the arms of his throne, "that's brilliant!"
And so the next day six hundred tons of concrete were dumped upon the briar. It dried quickly, and soon the briar could only be seen as a giant smooth dome with flecks of soot beginning to form upon its light grey surface. Whatever else might be said about Grex, he was a master builder.
"Hmph. Goddamn Snipe. Messin' up the whole damn city. Well, that oatta fix 'em." And with that, Grex Hardcastle went home and watched T.V.
"Hey, who turned out the lights?" Asked Joe The Snipe.
But what neither Grex, nor Rosengloom, nor Mr. Miestermaster, nor even the Snipe themselves knew was that thistle trees and bramble bushes eat concrete at an alarming rate. After all, concrete is almost completely made up of silicon. By the next morning the entire six hundred tons had been absorbed, and the Great briar was twice as tall, as well as twice as strong as before. Mr. Miestermaster was livid, and Grex Hardcastle was sentenced to death for aiding and abetting Snipe.
Every day, the twelve story home of Olivarias and Gwendilon was scrubbed clean of soot, and every morning it was filthy again.
But one must keep up appearances, thought Gwendilon.
She was was sitting in a heavily cushioned chair, watching the tele'. Their television was quite large, and even in color. Of course, as just about everything in Endersgift was either black, white, or grey, the color set really didn't make much difference. What mattered, though, was that they had a color television set.
Olivarias wasn't there. He spent most of his time making more money, so Gwendilon didn't see him much. She really didn't notice when he was around, though. She just sat in front of her large color television and let the servants feed her, clean her, and change her clothes.
Isn't life grand, she thought. But the commercials ended, so she stopped thinking.
Mr. Miestermaster fidgeted in front of his own television set, watching a sitcom. A husband and wife were in an argument and the wife had just called her husband a Snipe. The enraged husband was chasing her around the kitchen with a butcher knife. The laugh track carried on hysterically.
"Any suggestions, Rosengloom?"
For the better part of an hour Rosengloom stood in silent thought, then spoke.
"Suh, it's occurred to me that no one has yet to either see or hear a Snipe. There really is no proof that the Snipe even exist."
"Your point?"
"We play it off as a media hoax. Since no Snipe has spoken up so far we can assume that even if they're real, they'll remain silent. We send Sweet Ease to the briar to conduct an interview with them, and when nothing happens we accuse her of making up the whole thing."
"Well, I guess its either that or calling in the Army." said Mr. Miestermaster as Rosengloom began to push him toward the control room.
The Snipe sat amongst the branches of the bramble bushes, watching the throngs of protesters that taken to gathering outside the Great briar.
"Down with the Snipe!! Down with the Snipe!!" the people shouted, waving signs that said "Down With The Snipe".
"I'm beginning to think that no one out there likes us." said Doug, lazily scratching his green fur with one foot.
"Do you really think so?" asked Bob, dodging a falling seed.
A cheer rose up in the crowd, and all the attention turned from the briar to a group of armed guards fighting their way to the front, and the woman and camera crew the guards protected. To the population of Endersgift, seeing Sweet Ease in person was akin to seeing an earthbound goddess. Her willow thin body moved with smooth self assurance, and her long white hair seemed to glow with a self contained light.
"Greetings, my friends!" her clear voice chorused, "Please quiet down, so that the Snipe may answer some questions! We're broadcasting live!"
Most of the crowd quieted down, though there was still some noise coming from the back. After a barely detectable motion of Sweet Ease's head, some guards waded out into the crowd and beat a few people up. In the proceeding silence you could hear a pin drop.
Mr. Miestermaster was watching television from his control room.
"Get ready to pull the plug on her." he said into the speaker phone.
Back in the briar, Bob stood up.
"Doug, tell them to go away." he said.
"How?" asked Doug.
Bob thought for a moment.
"Perhaps you should shout at them."
"But what if they hear me?"
"Uh, Doug, I think that's the point." said Joe from a nearby branch.
Doug seemed to grope with an alien concept, then cleared his throat.
"Why can't you go away and leave us alone?" came a tiny shout from the Great briar.
Mr. Miestermaster slapped his hand to his forehead in disgust. His plan was ruined. He slammed down the phone. Angry beyond rational thought, he held a quivering finger over the Big Red Button. For a moment he was sure he would press it, then, just as abruptly he grabbed for a different speaker phone, the one which stood next to the Big Red Button.
"Assemble the Council of War." he growled.
Hours later, the Council of War stood before Mr. Miestermaster. They were a group of six generals that lead the Army of Endersgift. They annoyed the hell out of Mr. Miestermaster, because they all looked exactly the same and he couldn't tell one from the other.
Between the mayor and generals stood a small scale model of the city, with the briar encircled by miniature pieces representing soldiers and war machines.
"In conclusion, " one of the generals was saying, " a four pronged assault with a heavy artillery backup would give us an excellent offensive and defensive base of attack."
"An excellent strategy." commented the general to his left.
"I concur." said the general to his right.
The general to the far right side stepped forward.
"Sir," he said, saluting the mayor, "I suggest you also examine the idea of employing our nuclear arsenal against the enemy."
"Hmmm...possibly not a bad idea." mused Mr. Miestermaster.
"Suh, keep in mind that the Great briar stands inside the city limits, and one of your atomic weapons would wipe out a two hundred kilometer diameter of land." interjected Rosengloom.
"Granted, there would be civilian casualties..." said the general.
"No...I think we should only nuke the Snipe if it's absolutely necessary." said Mr. Miestermaster.
The general stepped back in line with the others gloomily.
"Goddamn fairies." he mumbled under his breath.
What ensued the next day can only be described as a bloodbath. Row after row of soldiers threw themselves into the Great briar, until it's outer thorns gleamed red in the orange light of cannon fire. Light flashed in from all sides at the huddling Snipe, and seeds rained down, jarred free by what little vibration made it to the Brier's center. Mighty war machines, some choppers and slicers, some stompers and mashers, roared into the bramble bushes and ran into the thistle trees. Before Grex Hardcastle had poured the concrete on the briar they might have made some headway, but as it was the Great briar held firm. Gears became clogged, chains snapped, and the metal gargantuans of the Endersgift Army grinded to a halt. Eventually, the only men left alive were the officers, who had no intention of going within a hundred yards of the briar.
"Massive casualties taken by the Army in the war against the Snipe, details at eleven."
It was times like this that Mr. Miestermaster wished that television sets had an on/off button. He had exhausted most of his options, but there was still one that he could still use.
The Club Mestophilies used to be the largest church in Endersgift, but the city hadn't needed a church in quite some time. Pews had been replaced with tables, the organ replaced with a jukebox, and holy water had made way for hard alcohol.
One table was bathed in red light that filtered though a grimy stained glass window in the ceiling. At this table sat The Dawnstealer.
Everyone in Endersgift had at least some vauge idea of who The Dawnstealer was. No one ever mentioned him. He was a man of average height, and was dressed completely in black. Even his head was wrapped in black cloth, and topped with a bowler. He wore a pair of sunglasses, but he seemed to be able to see perfectly in the dim light of the club.
Right now he was watching a hulking figure walking toward him though the thick smoke which covered everything in a haze. The figure was enveloped in a voluminous trench coat and was concealing his face with a wide brimmed hat, but The Dawnstealer knew who this man was.
Oh yes, and I've been waiting for him for such a long time, he thought gleefully.
"You seem to be uncomfortable walking among your beloved people, Mr. Mayor." said The Dawnstealer in a gentle, quiet, yet hollow voice. "I think it's because they would chop you to pieces if they knew who you were."
"Then perhaps you shouldn't announce it to the entire room." said Mr. Miestermaster in a low voice.
The Dawnstealer made a dismissive gesture with one gloved hand.
"Most of these people are on so many drugs they wouldn't notice if a helicopter landed on their table. Sit down."
Mr. Miestermaster sat, glancing down nervously as crackling sounds emanated from his chair.
"You must know of the Snipe crisis, " he began, and carefully explained what had happened from the beginning to the present. He altered things to look favorably towards himself, of course. "The people grow more dejected with every additional failing, and things have reached a critical point." he concluded.
"First of all, let's leave the people out of this. We both know that this city is nothing but an elaborate life support system for your old, deteriorating ego." said The Dawnstealer.
"I think perhaps you should save your daggers for the Snipe." mumbled Mr. Miestermaster.
"That's okay, good fellow, I've got plenty to spare."
"Are you or aren't you going to help me?"
"That depends."
"Name your price."
"You know my price."
Mr. Miestermaster brooded for long moments, then with one shaking hand reached into his coat and pulled out the black iron key. He set it on the table, and the key slid across it's surface into The Dawnstealer's waiting hand.
"You'll destroy the Snipe?" asked Mr. Miestermaster.
"Suffice to say that the Snipe will soon be the least of your worries." The Dawnstealer paused, then chuckled gleefully. "You, my beautiful, beautiful friend have just sold what was left of your city's meager soul."
The Dawnstealer sat alone in the control room. For a very long time he was perfectly motionless. Then he reached for the temperature control, and turned it all the way down.
Just so they know I'm here, he thought.
The next day the humid heat that had enveloped the city for as long as anyone could remember suddenly broke, and was replaced with harsh, brittle cold. All media mention of the Snipe suddenly ceased. People felt uneasy, and waited to see what happened next. Anyone who went near the briar was arrested.
The Snipe watched as a dark figure approached the Great briar. He was carrying a large square object.
"Who do you suppose this is, someone new come to kill us?" asked Bob The Snipe, but no one answered.
The Dawnstealer walked up to the briar and set a television set in front of it. He then slowly walked away.
The Snipe gathered to examine what this flickering thing was, and some became immediately interested in the game show that was on.
"I've got a bad feeling about this thing." said Doug, but few listened to him. The problem was, there really wasn't much to do in the Great briar besides dodging seeds. Until now, boredom was an alien concept to the Snipe because there really was no alternative. Over the next week the Snipe steadily gravitated over to the television, until only a handful weren't watching it constantly.
At the end of a week the dark figure returned. He slowly walked up to the television set, then turned it until it was at an angle so that no matter where the Snipe sat the tantalizing, flickering images were just out of sight. He then slowly walked away again.
"So now what?" asked Joe.
The days passed slowly, and the Snipe became increasingly restless and agitated.
"I'm telling you, we've got to do something!" Joe said to the colorful gathering around him, "I'm bored!"
"The briar is the only thing that keeps us safe. If we leave it, anything could happen." argued Bob. Most of the Snipe just watched the situation play itself out. This was the first time there had ever been even a disagreement among them.
"Well, I'm not gonna sit around all day with nothing to watch." said Joe, and with that began to march towards the edge of the briar. Most of them watched in unconcealed shock. Some nodded their heads in agreement, but did not follow.
"I wouldn't..." said Doug lamely.
Once Joe reached the boundary of the briar his bravado vanished. He looked both ways, then took a tentative step out of his concealment. When nothing happened, he moved toward the television set with growing confidence. When he got within ten feet of it, the set exploded in a giant white fireball that cut through the cold, and a resounding boom shook the ground, dropping seeds upon the horrified Snipe.
Never in their memory had a Snipe died (then again, Snipe tend to have terrible memories), and though they had no tear ducts, most of them howled in anguish. Only Bob stood firm, this mouth set in a grim line.
"And so Mr. Miestermaster has his first victory over the Snipe!" Sweet Ease announced happily, "A city wide holiday has been declared!"
Mr. Miestermaster glared gloomily at the screen. He had had no victory. He had declared no holiday. He was now nothing more than a figurehead of his city. On top of that, he didn't own a heater, just an air conditioner. He was just cold as everyone else. Life sucked.
"Congradulations, suh." said Rosengloom sarcasticly from his corner. He had become increasingly disrespectful and impertinant since the mayor had gotten back from his "Relaxing walk". Mr. Miestermaster was considering feeding Rosengloom to his dogs.
"Shut up." he growled, white vapor condensing from his words..
"Umm...yes, suh."
Mr. Miestermaster winced as he heard the faint clang of the key turning in the lock of the large iron door. The Dawnstealer walked casually into the throne room.
"Happy?" asked Mr. Miestermaster.
"Actually, no..." The Dawnstealer put his hand up to his chin thoughtfully, "I'd hoped to attract a large group of Snipe to the television trap, not just one. I'm trying to figure out what that Snipe was intending to do. Is one Snipe strong enough to lift an entire set? Was he a kamakazi Snipe sent to set off the trap? So many questions, my friend, but I have no answers."
"Are you unable to fufill the terms of our agreement?" asked Mr. Miestermaster with a sideways glance.
"Oh, don't be silly. I've just gotten started. But I need to know how these things think. What makes them tick? What is it that they most desire? When I know that, they'll be doomed, much like you."
Mr. Miestermaster winced again.
"How could you possibly find that out?" he asked.
"I'll possess a Snipe. Completely take over it's mind."
Mr. Miestermaster's eyes opened wide.
"You can do that?"
"I can do lots of things. This procedure is somewhat difficult and dangerous, but I've done it on various creatures over the centuries."
Mr. Miestermaster turned a bit pale.
"What are you?"
"Your fundamental nature, my friend, in it's most refined form. Well, no, I'll actually tell you. I once belonged to a race of beings on a world infinitely more beautiful and civilized than this one. And power..." he sighed nostalgically, " we had power you can't comprehend. That who ruled us could control things from Its own kind of control room-"
"Like me?" said Mr. Miestermaster.
"Yes, but It was a benevolent despot. But still, I wanted to control, too. Why should It have all the fun? It caught me trying to break in, and I was banished for all time."
"Why do you conceal your appearance?" Mr. Miestermaster was looking at the Dawnstealer with a mixture of contempt and awe.
"On my world our minds and matter are one and the same thing." He made as though he would take off his bandage. " Would you like to stare your fundamental nature in the face?"
"No way." said the former Mayor, shaken.
With that the Dawnstealer walked out the door.
Bob the Snipe and Doug the Snipe were sitting together on a thorn, when they saw The Dawnstealer return.
"Who do suppose this is, someone new come to kill us?" asked Bob the Snipe, displaying a Snipe's typical grasp on long term memory. The Snipe only remembered that the people outside had killed Joe, and even that was starting to fade.
The mysterious (if familiar looking) black figure sat down on the cold concrete in a meditative position. Bob noticed that Doug began to squint a bit. Suddenly the black figure began to go into convulsions. Doug the Snipe's head began to twitch a bit.
"You okay?" asked Bob the Snipe.
"Uh, yea, just sort of a tugging feeling in my head."
Outside, the Dawnstealer began to pound his head on the concrete and scream.
"Let me go! Let me out damn you! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!"
"That guy seems a little tense." Said Bob the Snipe, but looked over and saw that Doug's eyes had gone wide.
"Uh oh." Said Doug the Snipe, then he vanished into a cloud of green vapor. The black figure outside pulled himself off the ground and shakily stumbled away. Bob thought about the whole scene for a moment.
"These people are starting to get on my nerves."
"Well?" asked Mr. Miestermaster as the Dawnstealer came stumbling in through the doorway.
"It seems these little maggots have a psychological makeup as dangerous as the Brier." said the Dawnstealer in a shaken tone, "I was quite nearly killed...it was horrible...it was totally empty in there!"
"Can you or can't you deal with this menace?" roared Mr. Miestermaster, his patience at an end, "If you can't destroy those monsters, I want my key back!"
"Oh, I'll destroy them all right...even if I have to tear them apart one at a time."
"That seems unlikely, I don't think they'll fall for another television set bomb." said Mr. Miestermaster, not realizing that they probably would.
"I have a spell, I certainly do, that I can use to turn myself completely into a Snipe. Then I can march right into the Brier and blast away at them." said The Dawnstealer with a long, disjointed snicker.
"Uh...why didn't you use that before, if you don't mind my asking...suh?" asked Rosengloom glancing to see Mr. Miestermaster's reaction to the shift in loyalty. Mr. Miestermaster didn't even seem to notice.
"Some minor complications, but in light of the severity of the situation it's nothing large to worry about. Right now though, I'll retire to my control room and play."
Mr. Miestermaster watched him go, then arched an eyebrow.
"Play?" he asked, then grabbed the arms of his throne as earthquakes rippled through the city and a light tropical hail began to thunder from the clouds above.
The city went mad. Widespread looting of stores took place as every possible aspect of life in Endersgift began to fluctuate wildly. Though television didn't report on it (they were broadcasting children's shows and porno movies, and sometimes fusions of the two) people blamed the Snipe in hushed tones.
The Dawnstealer walked up to the Brier once again and began to move his hands, each finger tracing intricate patterns in the air. After a while, the Snipe could actually see the designs being drawn in green fire against the air.
"Who do you suppose this is, someone new come to kill us?" asked a Snipe.
"Oooo...pretty." said Rick the Snipe.
Suddenly the Dawnstealer was enveloped in green fire (which did not burn him), which grew in intensity until no recognizable shape could be distinguished in the flames. Then the flames quickly shrunk down to a tiny green spark. When the spark vanished, a black Snipe stood at the boundary of the brier.
The Dawnstealer walked confidently into the Great Brier as the Snipe applauded by clapping their feet together.
"A very impressive show, stranger." said Bob the Snipe, "What's your name?"
The Dawnstealer smirked guilefully and was about to speak, then suddenly his eyes went blank.
"Uh...I'm...um...I'm...oh shoot, I seem to have forgotten." said Dawnstealer the Snipe, squinting with concentration. "I think it was important, too."
"Don't worry about it, happens all the time." said Bob the Snipe, "We'll just call you Doug...seems like someone around here should be called Doug..."
That night, most of the people of Endersgift hid in their houses. They quaked in fear of these creatures that could slay The Dawnstealer himself. Those who did not cower were gathering around the Town Hall in increasing numbers, screaming for the mayor's blood.
"Down with the mayor!! Down with the mayor!!" they shouted, waving signs that said "Down with the mayor".
"Have you thought of exercising your nuclear option, suh?" asked Rosengloom.
"Oh, I definitely would, but there's no way for anyone to get to the Big Red Button now. The key disapeared with that bastard." said Mr. Miestermaster. The din outside was increasing, and the sounds of dogs being slaughtered was reaching a fevered pitch.
"They're comming for us..." said the mayor in a weak voice, his hands twitching and fiddling on the armrests.
"Oh, they're certainly comming for you."
"Don't fool yourself, Rosengloom, they'll kill anyone they find in here."
"Au contraire...suh...I don't think they'll hurt the man who hands them your head." He stepped out of the shadows, and in his hand gleemed a rapier.
"Rosengloom! No! Please! I'll give you ...uh... ", Shaking, he glanced around the almost vacant room, "My T.V! I know you've always coveted it!"
"Perhaps they'll even make me the next mayor." said Rosengloom as he coolly ran the Mayor of Endersgift through.
The Snipe had all gathered around Bob. He climbed to the highest branch, then spoke.
"It's obvious that everyone outside of the briar hates us. " he paused, then continued when he saw everyone nodding in agreement. "And as long as they're out there, we'll never be safe."
"So what can we do?" asked a Snipe on a nearby branch.
"We have to figure out a way to get rid of them. All of them."
"How?" Asked Doug the black Snipe.
This was a good question. Bob thought about it. He thought about it hard. He thought about it so hard that he didn't notice the seed falling toward him. It smacked him square in the back of the head and sent him tumbling off the branch on to a pile of seeds on the ground .
"You okay?" asked a concerned Snipe.
"I've got it!" came Bob's muffled cry, "That's it! The seeds !"
That night the Snipe sneaked through the city, each carrying a seed on his back, each clinging to the shadows. After a week of such activity, gas mains begun to mysteriously break, foundations began to crumble. And soon, small grey twigs began to sprout up through cracks in the cement. For as we know, thistle trees and bramble bushes eat concrete, and luckily for the Snipe this was a world almost completely covered with the stuff.
Gwendillon was trying to watch the tele', but the station kept on changing shows part way through. It was really very distracting. There seemed to be a lot of commercials for weed killer on, too. Her husband wasn't helping her feeble concentration skills either. Olivarias, in his dapper custom made black suit, was on the phone screaming about something. He just kept on screaming, "Do something about it, I'll pay any price!" She was also feeling very uncomfortable, probably the fact that she hadn't eaten or bathed in two days. Where were her servants? Not to worry, she thought, they would be back.
Oliver stood outside of his small home, futilely spraying the ceramic vegetation with some toxic substance. The brambles which had cut off his utilities were now cracking his walls.
"This is impossible!" he screamed, "I pay taxes! The city is supposed to take care of things!"
Olaf and Gwen where still in their usual positions when suddenly the T.V. went dead.
"Hmmm...." said Olaf, slowly getting up and walking to the window. "What's goin' on out there?"
Suddenly the entire apartment building came crashing down, collapsing on all its tenants and leaving blood stained rubble. The bramble bushes and thistle trees still stood like a skeleton where they had grown up through the building.
Soon the Snipe forgot why they were spreading the seeds, only that they should. They also knew to fear anyone outside the Brier, though they didn't remember why. So they simply continued to cover the planet with trees and bushes, year after year.
Thus the Snipe lost their innocence, and the world of Gemni Leone lost civilization as we know it.
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