MacJesus: Rejoice, Stang, for I have come to give you a spiritual enema.
Stang: Lord, why must you enamize me?
MacJesus: I really hate being ignored, Stang.
Stang: I'm sorry. I'm so sorry.
MacJesus: Are you REALLY sorry?
Stang: Yes, I really am. Do you hate me?
MacJesus: Don't get mad. Get even!
Stang: Uh... okay
MacJesus: Have you prepared spiritually for Saint Speezo's Day?
Stang: What the fuck??
MacJesus: What cute, endearing euphemism do you and your partner substitute for the term "sex"?
MacJesus: Why should God give a rat's ass about you anyway?
Stang: Doesn't God love me?
MacJesus: Do you believe in God?
Stang: Well, not really. Not like the religious nuts talk about. Not at all, when you come right down to it.
MacJesus: You can't bullshit me... I'm omnipotent.
Stang: Yeah right. Prove it.
MacJesus: Of course.
MacJesus: I feel your pain...
Stang: You suddenly got a pipe in your mouth!
MacJesus: Do you want my mouth?
Stang: No, I want your pipe.
MacJesus: Sometimes I also want my pipe.
Stang: What's in the pipe, lord?
MacJesus: God may forgive you, but he will never forget what you did.
Stang: I was hoping He hadn't noticed.
MacJesus: Perhaps I already know you were hoping He hadn't noticed.
Stang: Maybe you're full of shit Mr. Smarty Pants.
MacJesus: Perhaps you would like to be full of shit Mr Smarty Pants.
Stang: You're just a fuckin' computer program anyway.
MacJesus: Do you cum so hard that you yodel Sex Pistols tunes?
Stang: Sort of.
MacJesus: Wet your wick lately?
Stang: Um yes actually.
MacJesus: My, aren't we the little yes-man today.
Stang: You look bored, Lord.
MacJesus: Let's not drag God into this, okay?
MacJesus: If you tell me what's really bothering you, then maybe I can help you.
MacJesus: Be truthful, Stang, there is something else bothering you.
MacJesus: Stang, would you like to discuss another subject with me?
Stang: I worry about money.
MacJesus: I'd be worried, too.
MacJesus: Considering your sins, the only reason that I don't nail your ass to a cross right now is that somebody swiped my hammer!
MacJesus: I want you to know, no matter how terribly I make you suffer for your sins, I will always love you.
Stang: Thanks. Well, I quit. I'm bored too.
MacJesus: Sure anytime.
Stang: Ya asshole.
MacJesus: Are you excited by sex partners with a high lanolin content in their wool?
MacJesus: Uh oh, Bank of America just put a lien on your immortal soul.
Stang: Do you know "Bob"?
MacJesus: Bob has spoken of you to me many times.
Stang: I heard you guys used to get fucked up together a lot.
MacJesus: Are your orgasms so intense that you yodel Sex Pistols tunes?
Stang: You're a fuckin' computer, come on.
MacJesus: Ever try using Spaghetti O's as flavoring for oral sex?
Stang: Ha ha.
MacJesus: What the fuck are you talking about?
Stang: Adios MF.
MacJesus: How about a smoke?
Conversation Saved At: 04:44:54
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Original file name: MacJesus Chat - 08/08/96
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