F. During the period beginning March 23, 1933 and ending May 8,
1945, did you order, incite, assist, or otherwise participate in
persecuting any person because of race, religion, national origin,
or political opinion under the direction of, or in association with
any of the following:
1) the Nazi government in Germany
Yes! Yes! This was me!
If you answered Yes to any question above, explain fully (Attach
continuation sheet if necessary)
Well you see, I studied this book by Shirly MacLean and was able to
discover that I was Rudolph Hess in an earlier life. But since he (or,
I should say "I") was locked up in Spandau and not even allowed to get
letters or even packages for chrissakes, it was decided that my soul
could be transported to a new body. Once the other prisoners were gone
there was no reason not to accomplish the transfer.
In the last couple of years I began to worry that my old body would be
released, but fortunately the Russians kept saying no go because they
were pissed that I defected to the British and not to them! Anyway,
what with Glastnyost and Perestroika and Gorby and all I began to worry,
and channelled my way back to Berlin and caused the old body to
self-destruct (the difference in time zones made it easier to do this).
I didn't know this when I moved here, so can I still keep my Green Card?
