SubGenius Digest #359

Automatic SubGenius Digestifier (SubGenius-Request%mc.lcs.mit.edu@mintaka.lcs.mit.edu)
22 JAN 90 00:07:52 EST

SubGenius Digest #359 22 JAN 90 00:07:52 EST

Today's Topics:

Fwd: a warning
Research in Progress
Nuts in the Clench
Terrorism in the Clench?
The Bob Black Story

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Message-Id: <sZiRvkm00UoK81FHg6@andrew.cmu.edu>
Date: Sun, 21 Jan 90 11:10:24 -0500 (EST)
From: Peter Glen Berger <pb1p+@andrew.cmu.edu>
Subject: Fwd: a warning

---------- Forwarded message begins here ----------
Date: Sat, 20 Jan 90 20:36:57 -0500 (EST)
From: Stephen Brent Peters <sp2q+@andrew.cmu.edu>
To: Peter Glen Berger <pb1p+@andrew.cmu.edu>
Subject: a warning

Some of you may be wondering about Senator Khadaffi's qualifications to
be head chef at the "No SpoonS club" but that's not really what I'm here
to talk about tonight. I am, however BEak, which is to say that I'm
not. Of course this has no bearing whatsoever on the Soviet situation,
which is to say, the Cheese Dick Syndrome. Don't worry, you can't catch
it from inhaling certain popular alkaloids or by giving The Finger to
Italian people from Barcelona. This is also not what I came here to
speak about tonight. I am here to speak about satanic drinking
fountains. They are all around us, everywhere. Every mall and buisness
place is required BY LAW to have one. You've seen them yourself- next
time you stoop to cop a drink from one, take a close look at the little
lever you turn to make the water come out. See the strange symbols?
Did you realize that everytime you turn that little knob you are sending
a prayer straight to SATAN? Forwarned is forarmed brothers, so go forth
and scatter across the earth relocating graveyards to make homes for
Satan-worshiping chimpanzes. And don't forget to wear your Right-Guard.

Yea, Verily Brother

Stephen Adolphus Peters, Lord "Same To You Buddy" of da Mammie Nuns

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|Where does it go when you press "enter"? |
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|Stephen Peters, Carnegie-Mellon University|
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| "You can ask me anything!" |
============================================

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Pete Berger || ARPA: Pete.Berger@andrew.cmu.edu
Professional Student || BITNET: R746PB1P@CMCCVB
Carnegie-Mellon University || NEXUS@DRYCAS
Do not attend this college. || UUCP: ...!harvard!andrew.cmu.edu!pb1p
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"If only I could/make a deal with god/and get him to swap our places..."
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Subject: Re: Research in Progress
Date: Sun, 21 Jan 90 13:37:18 EST
Message-ID: <20921.632947038@A.GP.CS.CMU.EDU>
From: William.Welch@a.gp.cs.cmu.edu

I received this from a friend who works for Dole Pineapple.
I'm glad to hear she's taking the proper precautions...

------- Forwarded Message

From: portal!cup.portal.com!liss@Sun.COM
Subject: Re: Muff-diving face-cream

The reason nonoxynol-9 is used in shaving creams is that it is a
bacteriacide. It is the primary ingredient in a well known anti-bacterial
soap used in laboratories. We used it in my lab. :-)

The name of the soap is Bac-Down, and is available through any scientific
supply company such as Curtin Matheson.

--liss

------- End of Forwarded Message

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Date: Sun, 21 Jan 90 02:51:24 CST
From: Charles Forsythe <forsythe@convex.com>
Message-Id: <9001210851.AA06229@rigel>
Subject: Nuts in the Clench

>Subject: Terrorism in the Clench?
>
>Can anybody clue me in to what in the hell this is all about? (And,
>please, don't say "read it" -- in SubG circles, the difference between
>humor, libel, and total insanity is to be minimized.)
>
>Dale

I showed a printout of Bob Black's article to Pastor Buck Naked, of the
First Naked Church of Dallas. He said he'd forward a copy to Stang.

His reaction was to laugh violently and say "this is great". "I've been
trying show a friend," he explained,"that Bob Black is insane, and this is
the sort of thing I need."

Apparently, Bob puts out some pamplets about the "Employee Resistance System"
(ERS); they are basically instructions on how to screw your boss. Buck
sez that Bob Black has much worse things to worry about than Stang.

That's all I know.

-Reverend 3.0

[And if you're in Dallas on Valentine's day, show your love for "Bob" and
come see "Buck and the Tow Trucks". Greaser Country For The 21st Century.
Hear the classic hit "Drinkin' Budweiser and watchin' `Bob' on TV".]

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Date: Sun, 21 Jan 90 15:53 MST
From: LIPPARD%UACCIT@telcom.arizona.edu
Subject: Re: Terrorism in the Clench?
Message-id: <EE10DEBC693FA00313@telcom.arizona.edu>

>[drw asks:]
>Can anybody clue me in to what in the hell this is all about? (And,
>please, don't say "read it" -- in SubG circles, the difference between
>humor, libel, and total insanity is to be minimized.)

Bob Black is undoubtedly serious about his claims, at least serious
enough to do what he can to get somebody thrown in jail. As to the
truth of his claims, one can't be certain. Black used to live in
Berkeley, from which he allegedly fled to Boston after allegedly
being caught pouring gasoline outside the offices of Processed World.
In Boston, Black got into more trouble and moved to New York. I
don't really doubt that he got a bomb in the mail, since he seems to
do a very good job of stirring up trouble and harrassing people. His
accusing Ivan Stang of being behind it, and hinting that people like
Fred Woodworth are not beyond suspicion, however, seems
unfounded to me.
Black, a lawyer, is the author of _The Abolition of Work and Other
Essays_ sold by Loompanics Unlimited. He also contributed a lot of
stuff to the Stark Fist of Removal and the Book of the SubGenius.
Fred Woodworth's crime against Black was to make a comment in his
publication, The Match! ($10 for 4 issues from P.O. Box 3488, Tucson,
AZ 85722--latest issue has great dirt on Madalyn Murray-O'Hair and
the American Atheists cult and you can get it for $2), making a
comment about "creep lawyers." Woodworth subsequently got into
an argument with Black in The Thought (P.O. Box 3092, Orange, CA
92665) where Black wrote a highly inaccurate negative review of
The Match! (falsely claiming that Woodworth is an Ayn Rand
follower and even getting the price of The Match! wrong).

That's the extent of my knowledge on the subject.

Rev. Jim

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Date: Sun, 21 Jan 90 23:47:45 EST
From: Michael Travers <mt@media-lab.media.mit.edu>
Message-Id: <9001220447.AA15347@media-lab>
Subject: The Bob Black Story

Bob has (or had) an alcohol problem. When he gets drunk, he gets
aggressive. At the Boston Devival a few years ago, he reportedly got
mad at someone and poured beer in their tape deck and otherwise made a
nuisance of himself, to the point of getting tossed out of the party.
His girlfriend at the time decided she'd had enough, and left him in
favor of Ken deVries, a Boston SubG. Ever since then Black has been
waging a war of words against everything SubGenius. The only thing
I've seen in print from the other side was a letter from Stang
mourning the loss of Black's undisputed comic genius to the dark side
of the force. Perhaps a cycle of escalating harrassment has been going
on behind the scenes--who knows?

Note to Bostonians: the obscure 'zines in which this war is being fought
may be obtained at The Primal Plunge in Allston. Why, you might even get
to meet the fearsome Ken deVries (who has the honor of being the only
person shouted off the stage at the Boston Devival) in person, if that's
the word.

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End of SubGenius Digest
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