Today's Topics:
Another possibility for mischief...
The President's laser surgery (2 messages)
SubGenius Digest #459
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Message-ID: <"CSI 5733-32178"@CompuServe.COM>
Date: 19 Jun 90 08:41:43 EDT
From: MTG@csi.compuserve.com
To: SUBGENIUS%MC.LCS.MIT.EDU@MINTAKA.lcs.mit.edu
Subject: Another possibility for mischief...
Along similar lines of busting religious rally-goers for [apparent]
opiate use, I flipped on a radio talk show last night to hear talk about
the 2 Live Crew thing. I was very amused to hear one caller suggest that
since the 700 Club printed up the [obscene] lyrics and sent them to
whoever was on their mailing list, perhaps the 700 Club should be charged
with transporting obscene material across state lines...
- Mark G.
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Message-ID: <13324.645806985@NL.CS.CMU.EDU>
Date: Tue, 19 Jun 90 10:49:45 EDT
From: Todd.Kaufmann@nl.cs.cmu.edu
Reply-To: todd.kaufmann@nl.cs.cmu.edu
To: The network Clench <SubGenius@mc.lcs.mit.edu>
CC: "Eric H. Nyberg" <Eric.Nyberg@nl.cs.cmu.edu>,
Kenneth Goodman <kwg@a.nl.cs.cmu.edu>,
Joshua Glasser <shadow!joshua@uu.psi.com>
Subject: The President's laser surgery
Dream - 18jun90 a.m.
--------------------
I was watching president Bush give a speech on TV (or was i in the audience?).
I don't remember hearing his words,
maybe just the general afterimage sound of his voice.
I was paying more attention to his facial features.
Red lines formed around his features; writing appeared on his face, spelling ``lies,''
``good/bad'' or similar loaded value words...
I somehow knew these lines were caused by a laser--maybe i was causing it
with my mind.
Then deeper lines started to appear, as if an invisible knife were carving him.
At the end of these lines a fluid started to drop (like sap from a cut tree).
Then plasma laced with blood started to flow from his temples, above his
eyes, and from his eyes and the other lines.
I watched in amazement and horror,
and anticipation
while watching i also felt as if i were perhaps causing them,
while ``watching'' i also saw a premonition as if seeing in parallel
the present time and a minute ahead.
Then his skin started sliding off
and flesh coming off in layers.
He kept talking, but his look had slightly changed to someone losing faith,
or disbelief.
The entire feeling was as if something horrible and important was happening,
with feeling of detachment yet involvement.
I've been out of touch with the news lately; did anything happen?
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Message-ID: <9006191834.AA02276@shadow.>
Date: Tue, 19 Jun 90 13:34:16 EST
From: Joshua Glasser <shadow!joshua@uu.psi.com>
To: NL.CS.CMU.EDU!todd.kaufmann@uu.psi.com
CC: mc.lcs.mit.edu!SubGenius@uu.psi.com,
NL.CS.CMU.EDU!Eric.Nyberg@uu.psi.com, A.NL.CS.CMU.EDU!kwg@uu.psi.com
Subject: Re: The President's laser surgery
/\ /\ /\
O / \ O / \ O / \
__|___o/ \ o__|___o/ \ o__|___o/ \
| drop any attacker new curved model allows you to zap an attacker from
/ \ \ / \ \ / \ \
behind the ultimate screecher stops attackers from 15 feet away lung powered
great for playing cops
| | \ | | \ | | \
protect your 4x4 solid teak co-pilot the hottest gift item you've ever been
exposed to \ \ \ \ \
\ \ \ \ \ \
your ruger 10-22 or mini-14 can look like~this~nescentials~~\magnum~deluxe
\ \ \
\ \ \
phone holster incredible 120 hour candle night lantern repells bug instead
of attracting them back and butt|aches .. be gone__<| j <__<|
/\ /\ /\
O / \ O / \ O / \
__|___o/ \ o__|___o/ \ o__|___o/ \
| \ | \ | \
/ \ \ i / \ \ / \ \
| | \ dont know what it\means | \
| | \ | | \ | but, similarly\
------ \ ------ \ ------ \
\ \ \ \ \ \
\ \ \ \ \ \
~~~~~~~~~~~~\~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~\~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~\~~~~~~~~~~~
i dreamed that i had been conscripted, along with others
to rewrite all the poetry of the world where references
were made to specific brand names for any given thing ___
such that the poem now made reference to the genericj <__<|
/\ term for that specific thing; for example, kleenex became
O / \facial tissue paper. after labouring in this fashion for
__|___o/ what seemed a very long time, i escaped and was being
| persued by poorly dressed lawyer types. i knew they were
/ \ trying to hand me these small brown or white pills. i
| | couldn't let that happen. much bloodshed insued. finally,
| | i was alone, sitting by american lake in colorado, shaking
------ a vial of these pills. ------ \
\ \ \ \ \ \
\ \ \ \ \ \
~~~~~~~~~~~~\~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~\~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~\~~~~~~~~~~~
\ \ \
\ \ \
\ ___ \ ___ \ ___
j <__<| j <__<| j <__<|
---------------------------------------------------------------------
) (
/(_ _)\ Joshua Glasser
)^\\_\-=-/_//^( Artificial Intelligence Technologies, Incorporated
/o (@)/.\(@) o\ 40 Saw Mill River Road
\/ ^__ ^ __^ \/ Hawthorne, New York 10598
\|\VVV/|/ (914) 347 - 6860
\\AAA//
\~~~/ UUCP: uupsi!shadow!joshua or uupsi!ait.com!joshua
))|(( APRA: JOSHUA%AIT.COM@UU.PSI.COM
------------------------------
Message-ID: <9006191900.AA25968@psyche.mit.edu>
Date: Tue, 19 Jun 90 15:00:36 EDT
From: Michael Turyn <mturyn@psyche.mit.edu>
To: SubGenius%MC.LCS.MIT.EDU@mintaka.lcs.mit.edu
Subject: Re: SubGenius Digest #459
I wouldn 't be so s(ck)eptical; for example, Richard Shaver founded a whole
quasi-cult based on voices he heard in his head after he began arc--welding....
Anyway, there is a perfectly rational explanation for the wee one 's
actions and mood swings:
Friends, that radio mast was broadcasting DOKTORS FOR ``BOB''.
`But Yer Honor, I _had_ to nuke Europe; a dream voice told me that
there was a one-in-ten-million chance that DOKTORS FOR ``BOB'' might be
there sometime in the next ten thousand years!'
---`Case dismissed!!'
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End of SubGenius Digest
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