Today's Topics:
Dog Tags (and board games)
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Date: Thu, 21 Feb 91 07:01:17 -0800
From: 71155000 <skreee@ucscb.ucsc.edu>
Message-Id: <9102211501.AA04866@ucscb.UCSC.EDU>
To: Subgenius@mc.lcs.mit.edu
Subject:
Re: the Subgenius' CO status-
Why of course the Subgenius is exempt from the normal draft
proceedure...He or she is also perfectly capable of skipping boot camp
altogether and hopping straight into one o' them there Ah-pa-cheee Heliopters
and blowin' th' crap outta the Iraqi's, the Saudi's, the British, the French,
and of course he or she is fully authorized to engage our own fine American
soldiers in a lil' friendly fire...(note: "FRIENDLY FIRE~" is a term invented
by Bob himself in 1952...of course, at that time he was refering to the act of
setting his neighbors homes ablaze as part of a skillful controlled burn-)
If the Subgenius goes overseas this war will quickly become the
bloodiest DeathFarm man or Yeti has ever known. Of course the media will
never actually be able broadcast Bob's troops riding across the desert upon the
Great Sandworms of N'zer, but we will know... we will know the truth... we will
know the mistakes that will always turn out for the best... we will know...
On a side note: Just a few hours ago I read a flyer describing
in DETAIL how it was actually our current president, George Bush, who
assasinated J.F.K.--- I'll be tryin' to get a copy to send out to you all...
Yet another fine conspiracy theory---
--Rev. Skreee
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Date: Thu, 21 Feb 91 10:29:58 -0500
From: Douglas Humphrey <deh@eng.umd.edu>
Message-Id: <9102211529.AA13846@bagend.eng.umd.edu>
To: Subgenius@mc.lcs.mit.edu
Subject: Dog Tags (and board games)
Can you get Sub-G put on your tags as your religion? Another reverend
(who will remain nameless) passed on the chance to do that; otherwise
his military ID card would have identified him as one of *us*.
You hear about the new board game called "Scud Attack"? Yes, oh my
droogs and brothers, we live in the right country; the war is one
huge sales opportunity!
Our friend Saddam is speaking on the radio right now; does he drop
to his knees to suck our sacred shafts, or do we pick a different
oriface to demonstrate its ultimate sticky power?
Rev. Wor Bar
First Clench of the Islandic Jihad
(under the divine leadership of the
Rev. Tao Nee, founder of the Clench)
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End of Subgenius Digest
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