Today's Topics:
got any material to add to "PipeLine"?
medical science does it again
meteorological slack
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Date: Tue, 20 Aug 91 10:57:15 EDT
Message-Id: <9108201457.AA03306@teatime.think.com>
From: Doug MacDonald <macdon@think.com>
To: Subgenius@mc.lcs.mit.edu
Cc: Subgenius@mc.lcs.mit.edu
Subject:
Subgenius Digest Tue, 20 Aug 91 Volume 2 : Issue 227
o
o
o
Instead, I note with some
interest that it (He?) is headed straight for mc.lcs.mit.edu. Hmm.
Note also that if you project the path past Cape Cod, it intersects
Kennebunkport.
Bob saves!
Just wondering... I wonder what insurance policies do about "acts of Bob"?
--the Rightmost Right Most Reverend Touche Irony
of the Chapel of Our Lady of the Ford Small-Block
P.S.: Well, since I just triggered the NSA grep daemon, I might as well...
Bush Conspiracy Sununu SCUD DEA Iran Hostage Contra Yeltsin Casey CIA Imam
Saddam CFR Democratic Party Headquarters Quayle Mistress Carvey
P.P.S.: Too bad about Misha G., eh? Maybe some volunteer could go to his
dacha in the Crimea and minister to him in exile. What a pitch that would
make: "I used to run the Evil Empire, but then I found Bob..."
Misha is a diminutive for Dmitri, isn't it? Mikhail would probably be
"Mikey" or something like that.
------------------------------
To: Subgenius@mc.lcs.mit.edu
Subject: got any material to add to "PipeLine"?
From: ercn67@castle.edinburgh.ac.uk
Date: Tue, 20 Aug 91 17:10:31 GMT
Message-ID: <9108201710.aa03513@castle.ed.ac.uk>
In mail.subgenius you write:
>I'm putting together PipeLine #2 (Vol. 666).
>I need about 5 pages of additional rants, spews, ads, etc., to fill the
>thang out.
Have this if you like it. It's from the Friends of Fernando Poo.
===========================================================================
It can happen anywhere: a party, the recreation room, or sometimes even
in your local shopping mall. There's no easy way to tell them from other
people, the jugglers are everywhere. Remember if they approach you, just
say "no".
This is Paul's story:
"Well it all started at a party. It was just a local thing you know,
everyone was pretty drunk. Anyway, this guy, Peter, he seemed like a
pretty cool guy, he says "cmon through, see what's happening." Well
there was this whole room full of people, all juggling, laughing,
dropping balls that sort of thing. Anyway Peter handed me a set of bags
and said "here, you have a shot". Well I didn't want to look an idiot
in front of all these people so I had a go. Of course I dropped all the
bags. Peter kept encouraging me though, and by the end of the evening I
could almost do a cascade. It felt really great. Peter loaned me some
bags, and I started juggling on my own, I thought I could handle it at
first, you know, just the odd cascade and the occasional columns. I
should have realised then but I was getting pretty into it. They had a
sort of "club" going, they'd meet out of doors and juggle together. All
sorts of people would drop by and join in. It got so that we'd juggle
with anyone. I saw some of the others with clubs, I was beginning to
think it looked pretty neat. I got more and more into it. By then I
had a set of balls at work in the office, I'd sneak out at lunchtimes
for a quick juggle. Even in the pub, if I didn't have any balls with
me, I'd buy three packets of peanuts just so that I could get in a
juggle, it's hard to resist when you've been drinking. The "club" took
up more and more time. My parents were wondering where I was going
every night, then they found my diabolo. I was so ashamed. Thank god
they found out before I tried a unicycle."
Sergeant Grimes of the crack "Ballsup" squad had this to say at the
annual meeting of the Society for Traditional And Mature Pursuits (STAMP)
annual general meeting, said:
"Well I've seen it all. There's just no limit to the sort of things
these people will try. We've even caught a ten year old on a unicycle
juggling five balls. We've seen where it ends <shows a picture of a long
time juggler>. Look at him. His face is totally white, and his nose is
all red and bulbous, he even has to use makeup to show a smile. I've
seen these people begging in the streets and performing their "acts" in
public. Some of them even end up in circuses."
So be careful. Parents should look out for warning signs:
1. Unusually coloured balls lying about the room.
2. Strange thumps on the floor upstairs.
3. Large skittles
4. Bicycles with a suspiciously low number of wheels.
5. Sticks with string attached.
6. Square or round beanbags.
Between us we can stamp out this reckless craze. Be vigilant. Count the
number of wheels on passing cycles. Help stamp out juggling. And
remember, Just Say "No".
------------------------------
From: Todd Kaufmann <kddlab!atr-la.atr.co.jp!todd@uunet.uu.net>
Reply-To: kddlab!atr-la.atr.co.jp!todd@uunet.uu.net
To: The network Clench <SubGenius@mc.lcs.mit.edu>
Subject: medical science does it again
Date: Tue, 20 Aug 91 12:32:55 V
Message-Id: <10687.682659175@atr-la>
I've always found yawning a pleasure experience, which sometimes sends
tingles down by back. I found several years ago that with
concentration I keep this feeling moving up and down my spine (kundalini?).
However, I never experienced anything like this:
------- Forwarded Message
Date: Tue, 6 Aug 91 09:50:34 -0400
From: carm@cs.UMD.EDU (Richard Chimera)
To: ben@cad.cs.cmu.edu, ecp@h.gp.cs.cmu.edu, gk5g+@andrew.cmu.edu,
hcil@cs.UMD.EDU, peter.shell@cs.cmu.edu, sg08+@andrew.cmu.edu,
tallis@starbase.mitre.org, thughes@unix.cis.pitt.edu,
todd.kaufmann@nl.cs.cmu.edu, vaughan@psy.cmu.edu, xeti@lucid.com
Subject: medical science does it again
To: elmst2@unix.cis.pitt.edu, terri%mv2.UCalgary.CA@ucnet.ucalgary.ca,
abtca@stdvax.dnet.nasa.gov, 3475p@cc.nps.navy.mil, pate@cs.odu.edu,
rnk@sei.cmu.edu, smo%Swiss.Sun.COM@sun.com, mmap@andrew.cmu.edu,
carm@cs.umd.edu, thughes@unix.cis.pitt.edu, schwamb@ICS.UCI.EDU,
spike@ait.com, sims@starbase.mitre.org, m21564@mwvm.mitre.org,
pgould%mdf@mwunix.mitre.org, theresa%mdf@mwunix.mitre.org,
chris@starbase.mitre.org, vogel@starbase.mitre.org,
jcc@starbase.mitre.org, jon@starbase.mitre.org,
marnie@starbase.mitre.org, vbetten%mdf@mwunix.mitre.org
Subject: Where can I get some?
Date: Mon, 05 Aug 91 12:27:24 EDT
From: Rick Kazman <rnk@SEI.CMU.EDU>
Forwarded message:
> This is from the Stanford Univ. BBoard
>
>
>Did you all see that article in the Sunday Examiner about yawning? Page 3
>of the Sunday Punch section, in case you missed it.
>
>Three clinical psychiatrists had a paper in the Canadian Journal of Psychiatry
>entitled "Unusual Side Effects of Clomipramine Associated with Yawning",
>describing 4 patients who, while taking the the anti-depressant drug
>Clomipramine (brand name Anafranil) reported the unusual side effect of
>spontaneous orgasm every time they yawned.
>
>The first case of this was a female patient who had been depressed for 3
>months, but under treatment "Complete symptom remission occurred within 10
>days". She then asked how long she would be allowed to go on using the drug,
>since she had observed that every time she yawned she had an orgasm, and she
>was able to experience orgasm by deliberate yawning.
>
>Apparently it can work for guys too. One male patient said that while he
>found the repeated climaxes "awkward and embarrassing, he elected to continue
>the medication because of the therapeutic benefit he obtained. The awkwardness
>and embarrassment were overcome by continuously wearing a condom."
>
- ------- End of Forwarded Message
------- End of Forwarded Message
------------------------------
Message-Id: <9108202309.AA00598@thelonious.MIT.EDU>
From: "The Rt. Rev. Wor. Dr. Y. Foo" <dryfoo@athena.mit.edu>
To: subgenius@mc.lcs.mit.edu, dryfoo@athena.mit.edu
Subject: meteorological slack
Date: Tue, 20 Aug 91 19:09:47 EDT
} Date: Mon, 19 Aug 91 09:21:49 PDT
} From: "Michael J. Tuciarone" <auspex!tooch@uunet.uu.net>
} Subject: Bob in the news again
}
} > This time, weather forecasters have identified TROPICAL STORM "Bob", and
} > are predicting that it may WELL turn into HURRICANE "Bob" and SMITE the
} > coast of Florida! And goodness knows it could use a good smiting.
}
}... it's worth noting that H. Bob didn't
} even touch Florida or even North Carolina. Instead, I note with some
} interest that it (He?) is headed straight for mc.lcs.mit.edu. Hmm.
Yup! And a more perfectly SLACKful hurricane you will never see.
A testimoanial for Bob:
I had been pounding it out for The Con all weekend, 'round the clock,
and come Monday I was beat. There I was at 10am, worried about immanent
Soviet Nuclear Civil war, with 10 pissy students all clamoring for
attention, with a full day of teaching and another night of solid
slackless hackery sans sleep. But the wind outside the classroom kept
rising, the sky looked grim yet strangely full of eerie light, and the
rain came with increasing violence. Finally, someone came by and said
"Because of Hurricane BOB, the Institution is closing at 11am. Y'all
should go home."
So I sent the students home and went back to my office to begin the
slackless hackery. "At least I won't be up ALL night" I thought.
When I got there, there were:
1) muffins, large tasty muffins, large tasty FREE muffins
(in a variety assortment of fine flavors, with FREE orange
juice) that someone had brought in for another purpose, a
purpose that wasn't happening because of Hurricane BOB. So
"would we please have several muffins each?"
2) A notice on my workstation that the whole system was
going down in anticipation of BOB'S Holy Wrath, and would we
please log out and power down.
So, full of muffin and with no place to hack slacklessly, I was forced
to accept a ride home from a friend, during a short lull in the wind and
rain. Then BOB resumed his wrathful ways, smiting the tourist towns of
the Cape, and rattling a few local windows.
I closed some windows, and slept, for the first time in days, a deep
sleep, and dreamed of the Snack Muffins of the Luck Plane.
Too bad you missed it.
Praises to Bob!
-- dr foo
+-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
|Gary L. Dryfoos - Athena Training Admin. | "Tube Eeyore nacho bean,
| Internet: dryfoo@athena.mit.edu | Dadaist equestrian --
| Usenet: ...mit-eddie!athena.mit.edu!dryfoo | Arthritis no blur in them
| Phone: w: (617) 253-0184 / h: (617) 864-4248 | hinds to surf o'er the
| Campus: Room 11-311, MIT, Cambridge, MA 02139 | spring sand eros, devout
| USPS: P.O. Box 505, Cambridge, MA 02142 | righteous for June..."
+=============================================================================
------------------------------
End of Subgenius Digest
******************************
