Today's Topics:
Holiday Greetings from the Post Office
Robert Tilton Tape PART II -- Business as usual
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To: mt@media.mit.edu
CC: subgenius@mc.lcs.mit.edu
In-Reply-To: <9112132055.AA08443@mahler>
Subject: Holiday Greetings from the Post Office
Reply-to: ingria@bbn.com
Date: Sat, 14 Dec 91 12:59:39 EST
From: ingria@bbn.com
Message-ID: <9112141302.aa22847@mc.lcs.mit.edu>
Date: Fri, 13 Dec 91 15:55:00 -0500
From: Michael Travers <mt@media.mit.edu>
Date: Tue, 10 Dec 91 00:33:56 -0500
From: Palmer Vreedees <pv@propaganda.church.subg.org>
Subject: Postal worker leaves automated stamper in test configuration
According to a report by WEWS-TV, a repair technician at a U.S. Postal Service
facility in Columbus, OH, when repairing a machine used to automatically stamp
messages on cancelled letters, reconfigured the machine to display a test
message that he had learned from his instructor during training, but forgot to
reset the machine to print the correct message after he completed his repairs.
So now, instead of "MERRY CHRISTMAS" or "HOLIDAY GREETINGS", thousands of
letters in circulation bear the message "CTHULU RULES OK".
What makes this so perfect, assuming either the news or the original
poster didn't mess up, is that CTHULHU is mis-spelled CTHULU.
-30-
Bob
``And this is a very great sin against Cthulhu!''
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Date: Sat, 14 Dec 91 16:47:31 CST
Message-Id: <9112142247.AA03860@track29.lonestar.org>
From: "Reverend 3.0" <rev30@track29.lonestar.org>
To: subgenius@mc.lcs.mit.edu
Subject: Robert Tilton Tape PART II -- Business as usual
Ahem. There's been a little confusion. All of you slack-filled souls who
sent some $$$ to get the ubercool Robert Tilton parody will be getting one of
two things in the mail soon: A TAPE or a REFUND. (except for Jim Lippard,
who gets the caller #9 award and may get BOTH)
If you get your TAPE. Enjoy it. If you get a REFUND, then try again! Send
$3 (no $6 tapes no more) [this is a special SubG price, so indicate your holy
status], to:
Hiding Behind the First Amendment Productions
PO Box 832414
Richardson TX, 75083-2414
No Further Problems Expected. If you haven't sent $3, do it now because we
may run out of inventory for real.
WHAT HAPPENED:
Weeping Cyclops said I could sell the tapes out of their PO Box,
so I sent out a notice. Well, orders started pouring in and
then WC got a little annoyed... but that wasn't the worst part.
Suddenly, they realized that I was firing a lot of heat at a
multi-million dollar TV ministry and on the advice of the stalwart
fighter of the Con, Ivan Stang, decided to start acting like they
never heard of the tape (hence the REFUNDS with the "we don't stock
this" note). (Readers should also note the revised Church slogan:
"To heck with them if they have no sense of humor, if that's okay
with all concerned parties, that is.")
So what does this mean for the legal status of our tape? Nothing.
No word has come from Tilton Ministries (which is currently keeping
the IRS and the PostMaster General at bay) and when it does, it will
come to me and Rabbi Schwa. Not Stang. Not Weeping Cyclops. Not you.
Us. We take the whole blame. So please buy this tape before the
injunction is slapped on; we promise that this will not endanger future
MTV contracts for Stang. Honest.
-Rev 3.0
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End of Subgenius Digest
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