Today's Topics:
A Thousand Points of Corn?
Glasser's shame
I should know, I am a medical doctor.
you may be right!! (Re: Glasser's verse)
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Message-Id: <9208031526.AA22653@thelonious.MIT.EDU>
From: "The Rt. Rev. Wor. Dr. Y. Foo" <dryfoo@athena.mit.edu>
To: subgenius@mc.lcs.mit.edu
Subject: A Thousand Points of Corn?
Date: Mon, 03 Aug 92 11:26:39 EDT
from The Boston Globe
Monday, August 3, 1992
"Then Bush responded to whether he would drop out of
the race by holding up a half-eaten ear of corn to
the questioners, a gesture he did not explain."
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Date: Sun, 2 Aug 92 18:02:23 EDT
From: "Joshua D. Glasser" <glasserj@sun.mcs.clarkson.edu>
Message-Id: <9208022202.AA00268@sun.mcs.clarkson.edu>
To: The One True List <SUBGENIUS@mc.lcs.mit.edu>
In-Reply-To: <m0mEUUJ-0006y8C@zip.veritas.com>
Subject: Glasser's shame
Reply-To: glasserj@sun.mcs.clarkson.edu
o killifish thou art enchanting
thy maskest me to lie down
in the day times
in the night times
in the end times
and to rise again
powerless though several hundred times your size
the killifish will have its way
what could i do:
it was the first time.
i was eating "Bob"'s cold beans
in total suplication
i paid the bill
i thought
hell
$666 in my pocket! I'm ahead of the game in more ways than one
har har har
it was that damed dorsal fin
i knew it had to be the killifish
in my suprise i called out:
"Bob"'s is false
its the killifish weilds the real power
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From: Christopher Penrose <penrose@silvertone.princeton.edu>
Date: Sun, 2 Aug 92 01:58:49 EDT
Message-Id: <9208020558.AA05060@lespaul>
To: Subgenius@mc.lcs.mit.edu
Subject: I should know, I am a medical doctor.
Cc: look@mentor.cc.purdue.edu
I think gumbo is a world sex expression regulator. Yes, the vast
vortex of idiocracy is ruling paper. Sponge my loin clothing layaway
joint investiture by the threegone lily paddle swat that left my
bottom rosy. Must you always grunt when you ride the saddle? I am
close to the cow only when she smells Mrs. Beasley. Home base is the
noisome brew of suburban playgrounds. Prepare yourself to learn the
meaning of humanity; hold your nose and dive in. But wait, there is
more to strife than tuna fish sacrifice and lamb chops. The beef is
because of the bank teller cash accidents that occur every Friday --
Yo Dad? Why have you forsaken me? Crucifiction (sick) is societal
affliction. Jim's addiction. My volition. Jane stays.
"Saint Bourbon breath is teetering on roller blades to the Bermuda
passion circus. Invert your future and have whaling sex. The
prototype is not complete nor is the circle or the sandwich bowel
passage, nor is the liturgy. My sprawling betavocalization is only
temporary and is merely a microcosmic stylistic reference -- a
consciousness of the banal vogue, a pitiful barrel-scrapping that
denies the continuity of other auntiethoughts. LARD. Polysaturated
word splatter is hailing - thump...dugadugada - against my skull. I
cannot escape the realm of meta and the dream of honorary autism - my
hands clutching my people toys and thrusting them into scalding fires,
airline crashes, and cathartic bird trajectories."
Cornucopias are rarely seen on the Starship Enterprise. Demand equal
time! Articulate only when pampering clogged pores. The transom is
matriculating mob fiber trust.
Additional Commandments:
Do not pull back on the yellow safety bar; it will drop back,
automatically.
Do not advance ship your prosthetic limbs to ease travel comfort.
Do not bruise Kathy Rigby; I should know, I am a medical doctor.
harder copy can be obtained via
penrose@silvertone.princeton.edu
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Date: Sun, 2 Aug 92 17:50:35 EDT
From: "Joshua D. Glasser" <glasserj@sun.mcs.clarkson.edu>
Message-Id: <9208022150.AA00264@sun.mcs.clarkson.edu>
To: oleg@veritas.com
Cc: SUBGENIUS@mc.lcs.mit.edu
In-Reply-To: <m0mEUUJ-0006y8C@zip.veritas.com>
Subject: you may be right!! (Re: Glasser's verse)
Reply-To: glasserj@sun.mcs.clarkson.edu
I must be tested! The TRUTH must own out! Are you, and the rest of those
of true Yeti heritage, indeed being molested by a slackless hell-creature??
I must be tested-- in the traditional way of our numbers-- by the oldest
most excrusiating fashion -- to determine once and for all if I may indeed
already be utterly slackless. Of course, two ways to acheive this goal come
quickly to mind. The first way is where everyone concerned pools all their
money to send me to dobbstown for the necesary sergical testing and re-gland
scaping; of course at this stage I could only end up smaller, having already
easily exceeded the limits wherein even at THE clinic the have the tools to
handle; or we could put it up to popular vote. The former way was tried, as
you may recall, in 1984. at that time, the radiation caused by that many
subgeniuses who not only had money, but who deposited it all in one place
at one time resulted in tremendous still-bar original-slack-sink. "Bob" was
thought shot, reagan was re-elected, beastiality soared to crazed new levels.
whatsmore, i never did get the reduction surgery then either, as connie took
the money, thought she was being paid to teach me my "job" (as she called it),
and i never got to malayasia. thanks for alerting our side first.
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End of Subgenius Digest
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