Today's Topics:
news of the weird
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Message-Id: <9304281715.AA03437@virtual.edec.locus.com>
To: Subgenius@mc.lcs.mit.edu
Cc: taubin@edec.locus.com
Subject:
Date: Wed, 28 Apr 93 13:15:34 -0400
From: taubin@edec.locus.com
please remove me from this mailing list.
and please send confirmation.
thank you
Todd Aubin
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Date: Wed, 28 Apr 93 20:11:47 PDT
From: Chuck Shepherd <cshepherd@igc.apc.org>
Message-Id: <9304290311.AA21019@igc.apc.org>
To: subgenius@mc.lcs.mit.edu
Subject: news of the weird
WEIRDNUZ.274 (News of the Weird, May 7, 1993)
by Chuck Shepherd
Lead Story
* In an attempt to boost his campaign for mayor of Los
Angeles a week before the primary in April, Tom Houston
scheduled a "news conference" 60 feet underwater one
mile into Santa Monica Bay to publicize an
environmental program. However, only one reporter
attended, and he got seasick; the water was too murky
for Houston's campaign banner to be visible; several
divers in Houston's party panicked after becoming
separated in the cloudy water; and Houston himself
developed breathing problems at a depth of 10 feet, had
to be rescued, and called the whole thing off. He
finished well back in a field of 24. [Los Angeles
Times, 4-15-93]
Schemes
* Thomas Clayton Marsteller, 48, a member of a local
Masonic Temple, was charged with sexual assault in
Minneapolis in March by a woman who alleged that
Marsteller had threatened her when he assaulted her
several times in 1992 by telling her that he would
block her husband's Masonic membership application if
she didn't consent. [St. Paul Pioneer-Press, 3-26-93]
* Police at Southeastern Louisiana University arrested
the student body president, Mark Morice, in March,
charging that he got his fraternity brothers to steal
all the copies of the campus newspaper so that no one
could read an article critical of his handling of
student government funds. The managing editor of the
paper called Morice's action the "lowest form of
censorship." [Baton Rouge Advocate, 3-18-93]
* Police in Bangkok arrested four male transsexuals and
a woman in December and charged them with a crime spree
in which the four men, appearing to be female
prostitutes, smeared tranquilizer substances on their
breasts and enticed their customers to suck them until
they passed out, at which point the gang robbed them
and fled. [San Francisco Examiner-Reuter, 12-29-92]
* In September the South Dakota High School Activities
Association cleared basketball coach John Jordan of
charges that he committed recruiting violations.
Jordan had arranged for three black youths from New
York City to come live with him on the Pine Ridge
Indian reservation and attend his school. Jordan said
he was merely being altruistic and did not necessarily
covet the boys as players. Besides, he said, "They
were only average basketball players in New York City."
[Sioux Falls Argus Leader-AP, 9-20-92]
Compelling Explanations
* The New York Times quoted a co-worker of Joey
Buttafuoco in January on why Amy Fisher shot Mrs.
Buttafuoco: "It's the [electric] wires. The wires
aren't buried underground like in other parts of the
country, so with all this electricity in the air, it
fries some people's brains." [Pa. Rural Electric
Association Newsletter-N. Y. Times, March-April 1993]
* Arguing against a proposed Texas law that would raise
the minimum age for strippers and topless dancers from
17 to 21, Houston dance club owner Terry Allen told
reporters, "We're giving [the under-21 women] an
opportunity to better themselves, rather than working
at McDonald's." [Charlotte Observer, 2-9-93]
* Testimony in February of an undercover District of
Columbia police officer, who "agreed" to murder a woman
on contract from her husband but who then saw the
husband change his mind: "He realized he still cares
for her. So he said he'd rather have her severely
beaten." And in Tampa, Fla., in October, Richard G.
Hale testified that the shot he fired into his wife's
forehead, killing her, obviously was accidental: "I
wanted to shock her without hurting her. If I wanted
to kill her, I would have shot her in the heart."
[Washington Times, 2-27-93; St. Petersburg Times, 10-
21-93]
* In Louisville in April, lawyer Gregory Holmes and his
two alleged wives were found guilty of fraud in a
tangled web of misdeed. Holmes testified that he was
never married to his alleged first wife, and his second
wife supported that contention by affirming that Holmes
was addicted to the Tennessee soft drink Double Cola
and could never travel out of an area in which the
drink was available, and therefore could not have left
on a tryst that the alleged first wife testified to.
Holmes also testified that he could not have, as the
first wife alleged, shared an order of chicken wings
with her because he has a policy of eating chicken
wings "only" when he is with the second woman.
[Lexington Herald-Leader, 4-15-93]
Creme de la Weird
* Teresinha Gomes was charged with fraud in Lisbon,
Portugal, in March, after allegedly failing to repay
loans made to her by friends and neighbors. For 18
years, Gomes had pretended to be a man, Gen. Tito
Anibal da Paixao Gomes, a highly decorated soldier, and
to be married to a woman, who agreed not to reveal the
secret. Gomes's cover was blown when police, arresting
her on the fraud charge, ordered her to undergo a
physical exam. [Columbus Dispatch-AP, Mar93]
Least Competent People
* Johnny Sams, 20, and a 17-year-old male companion
were arrested in Union, Ky., in April after they
botched a burglary of Glenn Doolin's house. After
putting the stolen goods in their car, they realized it
would not start and went back into the house to beg
Doolin, who was by then calling the police, not to
call. They offered to put the goods back and to tidy
up the mess they had made. According to Doolin, the
two first begged, then tried again to start their car,
then came back in and begged some more and asked for a
jump start. Doolin called the police, anyway. The
burglars gave as the motive for attempting the burglary
their need for money to fix their car. [Columbus
Dispatch-Scripps Howard, 4-18-93]
Good News
* In March, doctors and nurses at Presbyterian-St.
Luke's Medical Center in Denver saved the life of a 30-
year-old pregnant woman who had a rare disorder that
caused her liver to burst and caused her to hemorrhage
nearly uncontrollably. Over a six-day period, the
woman was transfused with 116 gallons of blood, but
both she and the baby girl are now fine. [Columbus
Dispatch-Scripps-Howard, 4-16-93]
END
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Date: Wed, 28 Apr 1993 08:55:55 -0700
From: "Christopher M. Paige" <cmpaige@lynx.cs.usfca.edu>
Message-Id: <9304281555.AA36946@lynx.cs.usfca.edu>
To: Subgenius@mc.lcs.mit.edu
Subject: UNSUBSCRIBE
To: Subgenius@mc.lcs.mit.edu
Date: Wed, 28 Apr 93 8:55:54 PDT
X-Mailer: ELM [version 2.3 PL11]
UNSUBSCRIBE ME. thanks...
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End of Subgenius Digest
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