Today's Topics:
ahhh, the wonders of the net
I'll suuuuuuueeeeeeee.........
It's raining lawyers
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Date: Thu, 15 Jul 93 10:32:25 -0400
From: Eric Haines <erich@eye.com>
Message-Id: <9307151432.AA00508@hemlock>
To: subgenius@media-lab.media.mit.edu
Subject: ahhh, the wonders of the net
>} Newsgroups: clari.news.trouble,clari.news.canada
>} Subject: Lawyer testing high-rise window plunges to death
>}
>} TORONTO (UPI) -- Police said a lawyer demonstrating the safety
>} of windows in a downtown Toronto skyscraper crashed through a pane with
>} his shoulder and plunged 24 floors to his death.
>
> DOBBSTOWN (UPI) -- Police said a clueless Bobby demonstrating
>the reposting of someone else's article in a SubGenius Digest was thrown
>through a window with his gerbil and plunged 24 floors to his death.
>
>Mr. Hines,
>
>I'm so glad that you liked my posting so much that you decided that you
>wanted to share it with everyone on the Subg Digest -- except THAT'S
>WHERE YOU GOT IT FROM IN THE FIRST PLACE!
Strange, I had not realized the Subgenius Digest was now posting without a
header and using my friend's email address at CMU as a return address. No
doubt the xray spy satellites were shooting beams at that moment and clouding
my vision. Since the posting was originally on clari.news.trouble and
clari.news.canada, perhaps it got to a few people other than those on the Subg
list? Nahhh, that's a pretty radical theory, the spy satellites are a lot
more likely. I did not notice this clip on the Subg list before, which I
attribute to the Men in Black breaking into my computer at night in search of
my research on radical new forms of Watusi dance moves. Though this could all
just be a red herring to cover up the Trilateral Commission's manipulations of
Japanese street slang to alter our meta-hierarchy of cascaded meanings. The
lawyer was only the newest victim in the vast number of people's lives who
have been ruined by the anti-fluoridation campaigns waged by the
crypto-oligopolists in control of the chalk supply. I hope that clears up the
confusion.
Superior, or posterior?
Eric
------------------------------
Date: Tue, 13 Jul 93 12:33:56 -0400
From: Eric Haines <erich@eye.com>
Message-Id: <9307131633.AA05706@hemlock>
To: subgenius@media-lab.media.mit.edu
Subject: I'll suuuuuuueeeeeeee.........
Newsgroups: clari.news.trouble,clari.news.canada
Subject: Lawyer testing high-rise window plunges to death
TORONTO (UPI) -- Police said a lawyer demonstrating the safety
of windows in a downtown Toronto skyscraper crashed through a pane with
his shoulder and plunged 24 floors to his death.
------------------------------
From: "Richard L. Rosen" <rlr@panix.com>
Message-Id: <199307231232.AA07291@panix.com>
Subject: It's raining lawyers
To: Subgenius@mc.lcs.mit.edu
Date: Fri, 23 Jul 1993 08:32:11 -0400 (EDT)
In the immortal words of John D'Agostini <am500@yfn.ysu.edu>...
>
> Q: What's the difference between a Toronto lawyer and a sperm ?
>
> A: The sperm has a 1 in 100 million chance of becoming a human.
And the lawyer has a 9 out of 10 shot at hitting the ground. (But then again,
so do a lot of sperm...)
-- echo "This is not a pipe." | cat - >/dev/tty Rich Rosen rlr@panix.com------------------------------
End of Subgenius Digest ******************************
