Today's Topics:
Funny as a $2 bill
----------------------------------------------------------------------
From: Mike Tuciarone <tooch@auspex.com>
Message-Id: <9312280113.AA09398@auspex.com>
Subject: Funny as a $2 bill
To: Subgenius@mc.lcs.mit.edu
Date: Mon, 27 Dec 93 17:13:43 PST
> Makes me want to get a whole stack of $2 bills just to see
> what happens when I try to buy stuff.
The post office around the corner from work (well, over the railroad tracks
and across from the 49ers' training field, actually) has one of those nifty
vending machines that sells (vends?) dozens of Cool Postal Produx and probably
'frop too, to boot. It takes bills of up to $20 (hmm...never tried a $2...)
and gives change in, get this, Anthony dollars.
So naturally I put in a $20 and bought like one stamp, and got a Vegas-style
payoff. All the enervated types in line swiveled their eyes my way. I poured
the money in my pocket and swaggered back out to the parking lot.
I then had The Big Fun (tm) for the next couple of days whenever I bought
something small and cheap. People would say, "A dollar fourteen," or whatever,
and I'd hand them two coins. They'd pull a nice double take, then raise the
coins right up their faces and scrutinize them for a good ten seconds before
reluctantly deciding they were "real" money. I regretted they were impractical
for purchases over a couple of bucks...but *now* I know what I'm going
to fill my wallet with.
--the Rightmost Right Most Rev. Touche Irony
of the Chapel of Our Lady of the Rocket 350
P.S. to Canadians, Britons, et al.: Yes, yes, we *know* about loonies and
pound coins with leeks on the back and so on and on, but let's be honest:
currency printed in more than one colour just isn't *money*, innit?
------------------------------
End of Subgenius Digest
******************************
