Today's Topics:
(3 msgs)
how I learned to distrust the government and think myself
responses to digest #25
Toad-sucking Bob & Connie
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Date: Mon, 07 Feb 1994 04:24:43 -0600 (CST)
From: "d neal wise, esq" <DNWISE@ualr.edu>
Subject:
To: Subgenius@mc.lcs.mit.edu
Message-id: <940207042443.4020c359@ualr.edu>
where is janor? he was here in little rock lst fall.
then he was in boston for a bit... anyone know?
could someone mail me the ip# of the Site Which Cannot Be Named?
ive fogotten it baby.
_______________
"bob" will kill you to protect you.
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Date: Mon, 7 Feb 94 03:11:36 PST
From: "D. V. Henkel-Wallace" <gumby@cygnus.com>
Message-Id: <9402071111.AA17343@cygnus.com>
To: Subgenius@mc.lcs.mit.edu
Subject:
Date: Fri, 4 Feb 94 22:47:57 PST
From: "Abiogenic Creation, aka Andy Mark" <andym@armory.com>
Try looking in you .sh_history file: You can find neat stuff there sometimes
Try reaching in the toilet bowl when you get up: You can find neat
stuff there sometimes.
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From: christopher williams <cgw@unt.edu>
Message-Id: <199402071643.KAA17739@sol.acs.unt.edu>
Subject:
To: Subgenius@mc.lcs.mit.edu
Date: Mon, 7 Feb 1994 10:43:11 -0600 (CST)
Reply-To: cgw@unt.edu
Automatic Subgenius Digestifier wrote:
>Prospects looked very bright [in 1996] for the Republicans, especially
>in light of Ross Perot's decision, after consulting his volunteers, to
>become president of Belize (where he remained until 1998, when he was
>finally picked up by the Mother Ship).
>
> newsweek 3jan94 p54
> (dave barry)
if Ross Perot is Slack, then i'm Pink.
kill me,
-cgw-
-- christopher williams cgw@unt.edu +1 817 565 2324 Kill "Bob" system administrator university of north texas Eat "Bob". Love "Bob".------------------------------
Message-Id: <9402071323.AA06056@jekyll.ccv> To: Subgenius@mc.lcs.mit.edu Subject: how I learned to distrust the government and think myself safe with a gun... In-Reply-To: <9402071134.AA05948@jekyll.ccv> Date: Mon, 07 Feb 1994 13:23:17 +0000 From: Jean-Alain Le Borgne <jalb@ccv.fr>
> Date: Thu, 3 Feb 94 14:01:00 CST > From: Rex Black <rex@iquery.iqsc.com> > Message-Id: <9402032001.AA27926@qasun.iqsc.COM> > > [...] > > "Armed Ham" Rex
Don't you rely too much, or not enough, on having a gun? Have you got any training on armed human targets? Some people, who use guns for a living, who work for the cops, the army, or gangs, do. Do you really think so-called "law abiding citizens" will survive better with guns in the violent mess you're sinking in? Ah ah! Why don't you KILL "BOB" instead? And then think a bit on what it *really* takes? [jalb]
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Date: Mon, 7 Feb 1994 18:01:01 -0600 From: stumattheand@spock.colsf.edu To: Subgenius@mc.lcs.mit.edu Subject: responses to digest #25 Message-ID: <9402071926.aa02407@mc.lcs.mit.edu>
From: mwilson@bell.susqu.edu Date: Fri Feb 4 17:10:01 EST 1994 Subject: To: mc.lcs.mit.edu!Subgenius@bell.susqu.edu In-Reply-To: your message of Fri Feb 4 00:04:00 EST 94 Message-ID: <9402050505.aa08285@mc.lcs.mit.edu>
Bring out your Dead! Yes folks, now you too can be dead. all you have to do is be unlucky enough to be the victim of a sufficiently brutal crime in any city or town of the US (or elsewhere). Owning a gun is just a waste of time. Shooting a criminal won't make you any safer. All that you can do is gather up enough luck to not get robbed or killed. Just tap in to your friendly local Luck Plane(tm) and you won't need a gun. Why not sell your gun and buy something you can really use? Pope Jubal, Master of all small mammals and most fish Praise "Bob" Kill "Bob" Eat "Bob"
----------------------------- Reply to Pope Jubal: From: stumattheand@vax.colsf.edu ($aint @ndrew) Re: Luck Plane for Sale
Ah, but since the big Con controls the guns (as of now), we mutants are having a tough time tapping our Luck Plane. I mean, when was the last time *you* ever won the Lotto? The trick is to use our powers of TransMutation Telepathy and turn the pink's guns into something harmless, like Farley Fruit Rolls. Then, don't just eat the fruit roll, eat the HELL out of it. Ergo, no Cons with guns, and they don't even get to eat the fun-filled shapes of Trolls or dinosaurs.
$aint @ndrew
OGYR NETWORK: PO BOX 53: Plainfield Il. 60544 a SubGenius / Discordian 'zine ($3 includes postage) "We are the makers of the dream. We are the dreamers of the music"
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Date: Sat, 5 Feb 1994 13:01:18 -0500 From: Michael L Turyn <mturyn@world.std.com> Message-Id: <199402051801.AA10851@world.std.com> To: Subgenius@mc.lcs.mit.edu Subject: Left and right
Remember, all human political divisions are there to blind us---and I mean US--to our true destiny.
Gun control? The Government must have NO GUNS! The people must have no guns! Each drunken, stumbling, depression-ridden Sub must have the ability to wield Instant Nuclear World-Death.
Welfare? Let the pinks work out what they do with each other. Subs deserve the equivalent of one year's worth of intensive pink labor for every eye-blink we deign to bestow in this blighted world. Our goddamn revenge fantasies do more to keep the peace (such as it is) than all the smarmy peaceniks AND mature death-dealing hardware COMBINED.
Ecology? Yeti can eat anything, drink anything, mate with anything. Many of these things Kill Us, but they're in no danger of Norming us out (this Ultimate Power is reserved to YOU my friend). We take great offence at those who would deny us our sylvan glades, swarming wetlands, zero-gravity sex chambers, and mutagenic toxic waste dumps. Not only is our ecological thinking "deep," it's also "cold, too."
(etc. etc. blah blah blah)
-Rev. Archie Bea
"Smith wanted to smoke some dope that he'd grown on his personality disorders ---he 'd figgered that no sheriff in the entire United St- United Kastner Heads of America would go looking for dope on his personality disorders---so Jones set off a device that convinced the Early Warning System that the Russians had launched an attack, so that started a Nuke War and we all got off from work that day and got FUCKED UP. The Janor Device! The Janor Device!" --The Janor Device, from "The Janor Device"
----------------------------- Reply to Rev. Archie Bea: From: stumattheand@vax.colsf.edu ($aint @ndrew) Re: Welfare Babies A Go-Go
That's all fine and dandy, except for the part about those who have "fallen off of the wagon". See, the pinks are useless to us if they are a) undesireable as slaves, b) unfit to eat, or c) have no money for us to acquire from them. Then, all they serve to do is just take up space, oxygen, various nutrients, and just plain ol' be annoying. A quick and easy way to remove them from the world "scene" would be of great benefit to this world. Mind you, come 1998, we don't have to worry. The X-ists will clean up the mess.
$aint @ndrew
"You can't arrest me, officer, I'm not drunk. I may be half ass drunk, though... wheeee!" - Drs. 4 "Bob"
OGYR NETWORK: PO BOX 53: Plainfield Il. 60544 ($3 for latest)
-------------- end of replies from: stumattheand@vax.colsf.edu to: Subgenius@mc.lcs.mit.edu for: SubGenius Digest #25
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From: Richard Mlynarik <mly@adoc.xerox.com> To: SubGenius@mc.lcs.mit.edu Subject: Toad-sucking Bob & Connie Message-Id: <94Feb7.124211pst.156737@atalanta.ADOC.xerox.com> Date: Mon, 7 Feb 1994 12:41:58 PST
1 Feb 94:
(SONORA)- An Explorer Scout leader and his wife have been arraigned on drug possession charges after he admitted smoking hallucinogenic venom extracted from rare toads. Bob and Connie Shepard... teachers at a public school-sponsored nature camp... each face up to 15 years in prison if convicted of possessing bufotenine, a hallucinogenic chemical believed to be the psychoactive agent in toad venom, and other controlled substances. Tuolemne County prosecutor Jim Boscoe said venom is produced by glands behind each eye of the Colorado River toad, and is said to produce an intense psychedelic high. Users squeeze the venom from the glands and dry it before smoking it. The seized toads are currently living in the offices of the combined drug task force of Alpine, Calaveras and Tuolomne counties, across the street from the Calaveras County Fair made famous by a Mark Twain story about a frog jumping competition.
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End of Subgenius Digest ******************************
