Today's Topics:
CompuSlack
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From: "Andymon, the Deschapingulator" <andym@armory.com>
To: Subgenius@mc.lcs.mit.edu
Subject:
Date: Sat, 12 Mar 94 0:21:21 PST
Message-ID: <9403120021.aa21606@deeptht.armory.com>
>
>Date: Fri, 11 Mar 1994 05:30:32 -0500
>From: Michael L Turyn <mturyn@world.std.com>
>Message-Id: <199403111030.AA04448@world.std.com>
>To: Subgenius@mc.lcs.mit.edu
>Subject:
>
>Oh dear, dear "Bob", splitter of Moonies, Immantiser of the Shat-on,
>Welder and Layer of Pipe (if you know what I mean "Bob" old pal heh
>heh), receiver of sycophantic greetings from unredeemable idiots who
>add parenthesised innuendos and then make self-referential asides
>about them,
>
>Hi!
>
>How's things? The Church doesn't smell, it's just dead that way.
>No-one has bothered to kill you for awhile because it JUST ISN'T WORTH
>IT ANY MORE, but that doesn't mean we shouldn't be killing you. I
>mean, who better?
>
>Our current Prez did NOTHING about the existence of Doktors for "Bob"
>in his own fiefdom for twelve years. What does this mean for our
>nation, Oh Ye of Much Slack, oh Ye Good Lord Choker? Will the world
>end in four years and we won't even notice? Will I _ever_ get my
>tapes from the Muthah Church?
>
>Why does it look like all the current TV commercials were made by men
>who joined the Church for two months in 1985?
>
>Why is the "X-Files" on TV and "Xxxenophile" isn't? ANSWER ME.
>
>Huh, "Bob"?
>
>--Hell-Banker Banquo Helle
>
You wouldn't happen to be an avid reader of TENNIS WORLD or TENNIS DIGEST,
WOULD YOU?
On the STAFF, PERHAPS?
hmm.... We have a ubiquitous one, here..
AndyNOM<
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Message-Id: <199403120948.AA23838@zaphod.mps.ohio-state.edu>
Date: Sat, 12 Mar 94 4:00:47 PST
From: The Evolution Control Committee <ecc@gnu.ai.mit.edu>
To: Subgenius@mc.lcs.mit.edu
Subject: CompuSlack
Automatic Subgenius Digestifier melted like a dual-ended candle by saying:
> I was at an interview for a job with Compuserve. One of my fellow
> interviewees did the old "pick up the mouse and point it at the screen,
> clicking wildly" trick. I don't think she got the job. In fact I didn't
> get the job either. Pink shits.
Awww Cont-rare, moi pinkee. I worked there for more years than I
care to admit, and I can assure you that slack is a thriving secret
society within those four barbed-wire-topped corporate walls. During my
tenure, I used multitudinous company resources to build my zine
collection and distribute my musical creations world-wide. I wrote
programs to play Boggle (good ones, too, with a very well-tested and
effective Boss Button). I wrote programs that worked sort of like Mad
Libs. I also pulled numerous pranks, some of which were so good that
they were not discovered until TWO YEARS after I left, when the sooper-
secret security team interviewed, essentially, "the other" liberal
there.
> If any of you can get hold of a copy of Granta (an English Literary
> Quarterly), I would highly reccomened the latest "Crime" issue.
> Especially good is James Ellroy's "Dick Contino's Blues", about a sex and
> drug crazed accordian player in the 50s. Highly Slackfull.
Any leads on this would be welcome. I have two of Dick's albums
(both chance thrift store finds) and have used his picture as my own
promo picture. Dick is the Frankie Yankovic (or maybe the Weird Al) of
slack.
Which brings up an interesting point: I rarely see much on da SubG
list to respond to, but in your message there were not short of TWO
items so dear to my frop-smokin' soul that I could keep quiet no longer.
I don't care if I'm hetero; I don't care if I like large breasts. I
HEREBY CONVERT TO HOMOSEXUALITY AND AM PROPOSING MARRIAGE TO YOU,
EFFECTIVE IMMEDIATELY.
Or bill me.
- Mark G.
-- ecc@gnu.ai.mit.edu The Evolution Control Committee"CompuServe is not a pair of glasses, but is actually an Online Info Service." DESICCANT -- DO NOT EAT
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End of Subgenius Digest ******************************
