Today's Topics:
(2 msgs)
A Fond Farewell, ye Pinks!
Dan, you ignorant fuck
Elvis is dead.
He's HERE!
List removals
Unsubscribe me, now!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Your plan is working!
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From: dryfoo@mit.edu
Message-Id: <9404071613.AA15616@thelonious.MIT.EDU>
To: Subgenius@mc.lcs.mit.edu
Subject:
Date: Thu, 07 Apr 94 12:13:42 EDT
Dear Mr. Not-Subscribing-Anymore,
} Date: Wed, 6 Apr 1994 22:56:57 -0400 (EDT)
} From: daniel leonard <dleonar@andy.bgsu.edu>
} Subject:
} To: Subgenius@mc.lcs.mit.edu
} Message-Id: <Pine.3.07.9404062251.B25681-7100000@andy.bgsu.edu>
}
} Didn't you hear me the first time? Unsubscribe me, now!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Yeah. I heard you the first time. But you must realize that this
SUBSCRIBE/UNSUBSCRIBE thing could eat up a lot of My Own Personal Slack,
if I decided to let it. Guess what: I haven't.
SO... being neither A Frightened Slackless Drone Of A Pink NOR a
Listserv golem, I'll get around to unsubscribing you WHEN I BLOODY WELL
FEEL LIKE IT! In the meanwhile, you might consider the fact that people
who write to subgenius-REQUEST@mc.lcs.mit.edu get a much higher class of
service than those who just flood the digest itself with their
_flatulantuus_ _ignorante_ _et_ _flagrante_.
In short, we have DEEPLY APPRECIATED your association with us as a
HIGHLY VALUED CLIENT and sincerely hope you enjoyed our COMMITTED
CUSTOMER SERVICE. (If not, please send us the necessary forms, and we
will be pleased to have you COMMITTED forthwith.)
Yours in a truly sincere, kind of Total Quality headspace,
-- dr foo
------------------------------
Date: Thu, 7 Apr 1994 14:58:24 -0400 (EDT)
From: Victor Story <story@acad.csv.kutztown.edu>
Subject:
To: Subgenius@mc.lcs.mit.edu
Cc: Subgenius@mc.lcs.mit.edu
Message-Id: <Pine.3.89.9404071425.A12532-0100000@acad.csv.kutztown.edu>
The funniest messages on this list recently are the signoff demands and
the comment that this list is a waste of time. That moron was serious.
That nincompoop obviously thought that this list was going to be a
valuable investment of his (her?) time. You do not get much dumber than
that. They need to get a show on sattelite TV with some of the people in
the recent list. The idea that this list should be signedoff because in
wasting time it is a disappointment to one's original expectations
indicates they are lower even than us sub-geniuses. I cannot even find
the useful time to invest in sending a sub-genius type message, poem, or
insult, I am reduced to this banal normalcy by their stupendous
simplemindedness. At some point, in time past, that person experienced
Bob and thought that their time was not being wasted. My the almighty
smite them with a long life of continued asinine existence.
------------------------------
Message-Id: <9404071322.AA10697manitoba.marcam.com>
Date: Thu, 07 Apr 1994 09:20:51 EDT
Reply-To: trevay@marcam.com
From: "Swami-ji B. Jeebees (\"x\"" <@manitoba.marcam.com:trevay@marcam.com>
To: Subgenius Slackmailer <subgenius@mc.lcs.mit.edu>
Subject: A Fond Farewell, ye Pinks!
Mr. daniel leonard <dleonar@andy.bgsu.edu>, now undergoing treatment for a
severe cranial-rectal inversion caused by an unnatural affection for
Pepto-Bismol, whines:
>Didn't you hear me the first time? Unsubscribe me, now!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Of course, we all heard him, because HE'S TOO FUCKING STUPID to remember that
the address to which it should send these MISERABLE LITTLE FLATULENT
EJACULATIONS is subgenius-request@mc.lcs.mit.edu.
Now, we shall our bow our heads, and peer down at our nipples and sundry fun
bits what lie on below, below, below:
Ye Pinks, take heed, and get thee from our sight! We share not our 'frop
with thee, and if ye yet sap our precious SLACK, we shall have to get out
the Xacto knife set, with which we shall open on thee a Sacred Third
Nostril, without benefit of Bubba's Old Weathered Rotgut anesthesia!
Therefore, be gone, unclean spirits, all!
And be sure to purchase a sense of fuckin' humor, on the way out the door. Tip
the bartender, too.
("x") The Venerable Maha Swami-ji B. Jeebees (His mark)
DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD
For one stretch of two years, Elvis Presley reportedly ate nothing
but meat loaf, mashed potatoes, and tomatoes.
-- From "Uncle John's Bathroom Reader"
DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD
------------------------------
From: Bill Marrs <bill@atria.com>
Message-Id: <9404071423.AA22043@wayforward>
Subject: Dan, you ignorant fuck
To: dleonar@andy.bgsu.edu
Date: Thu, 7 Apr 94 10:23:15 EDT
Cc: Subgenius@mc.lcs.mit.edu
Reply-To: bill@atria.com
> Didn't you hear me the first time? Unsubscribe me, now!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Dan,
What kind of ignorant flaming loser are you?
Everyone and their brother knows that the way to deal with
(un)subscribe requests is to send to <list>-request@<address> .
I'm sure if you send a nice cheerful piece of email to
Subgenius-request@mc.lcs.mit.edu, they will unsubscribe you.
Why don't you try reading a few signs on the information
super-highway.
twit.
------------------------------
Date: Thu, 7 Apr 1994 12:59:34 -0400
From: Hugh Gwyn <hgwyn@magellan.geo.usherb.ca>
Message-Id: <9404071659.AA16240@magellan.geo.usherb.ca>
To: subgenius@mc.lcs.mit.edu
Subject: Elvis is dead.
Elvis is dead!
Yip, he used to live on my block, but he died of a heart
attack this winter. Flags should be at half mast. Black is
de rigeur.
He was a nice fellow, I talked to him several times. Says he
can't listen to his old records because of all the notes he
missed.
-fil
------------------------------
Message-Id: <9404071328.AA10742manitoba.marcam.com>
Date: Thu, 07 Apr 1994 09:27:14 EDT
Reply-To: trevay@marcam.com
From: "Swami-ji B. Jeebees (\"x\"" <@manitoba.marcam.com:trevay@marcam.com>
To: Subgenius Slackmailer <subgenius@mc.lcs.mit.edu>
Subject: He's HERE!
Yes, "Bob" is with us, on the Internet! What follows is a list of all the One
True "Bob's," as scanned by the SLACK-religious genetic experimenters at
mail-server@rtfm.MIT.EDU, along with the dates they were last seen on the
Sacred Net.Chunnel o' SLACK:
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
J.R.."Bob".Dobbs@p666.f103.n632.z3.fidonet.org (J.R. "Bob" Dobbs) (May 11 93)
asshole@rec.pets.cats (Bob Dobbs) (Aug 30 93)
flatend@andy.bgsu.edu (Bob Dobbs) (Aug 28 93)
aviz@netcom.com (J.R. "Bob" Dobbs) (Feb 24 94)
bobdobbs@freenet3.scri.fsu.edu (J.R. "Bob" Dobbs) (Mar 4 94)
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
You can see that He Is Truly With Us, and though His voice has changed, His
breath still smells AWFUL! Thanks, "Bob"!
("x") The Venerable Maha Swami-ji B. Jeebees (His mark)
------------------------------------------------------------------------
From a Vermont cemetery:
Sacred to the memory of my husband, John Barnes,
Who died January 3, 1803.
His comely young widow, aged 23, has many qualifications of a
good wife, and yearns to be comforted.
------------------------------------------------------------------------
------------------------------
Date: Thu, 7 Apr 1994 09:55:24 -0500
From: Steve Guccione <guccione@ccwf.cc.utexas.edu>
Message-Id: <199404071455.JAA14172@donald.cc.utexas.edu>
To: SubGenius@mc.lcs.mit.edu
Subject: List removals
This list is the biggest waste of time I have ever encountered!
Is there some way for me to get back issues, perhaps by FTP?
-- Steve
-- 4/7/94
------------------------------
Date: Thu, 7 Apr 94 11:35:40 PDT
From: "Michael J. Tuciarone" <tooch@firmworks.com>
Message-Id: <9404071835.AA01807@firmworks.com>
To: Subgenius@mc.lcs.mit.edu
Subject: Unsubscribe me, now!!!!!!!!!!!!!
> Didn't you hear me the first time?
Perfectly, O slackless varlet.
But FEAR NOT, for I will take PITY upon you. For just $10, I will
unsubscribe you from this list (for even though I am not one of
the HIEROPHANTS who dispense this daily SACRAMENT, I am an INITIATE
and I have the power to CONTROL MAIL). For $50, I will share with
you the SECRET RUNE of MAIL CONTROL. And for $100, I will give you
your VERY OWN NEWSGROUP in the exclusive and desirable "alt" hierarchy.
You will have been enlightened when you join your -request to the subgenius.
--the Rightmost Right Most Rev. Touche Irony
of the Chapel of Our Lady of the Ford Small-Block
------------------------------
Date: Thu, 7 Apr 94 00:46:32 EDT
From: "Joshua D. Glasser" <glasserj@sun.mcs.clarkson.edu>
Message-Id: <9404070446.AA11120@sun.mcs.clarkson.edu>
To: JVH1@omnigate.clarkson.edu
Cc: Subgenius@mc.lcs.mit.edu
Subject: Your plan is working!
Reply-To: glasserj@sun.mcs.clarkson.edu
Its been a highly productive week. Why not we knock early?
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End of Subgenius Digest
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