Today's Topics:
"Bob"... camels... on the desert... say YEAH!!!
Well said!
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To: subgenius@mc.lcs.mit.edu
Subject: "Bob"... camels... on the desert... say YEAH!!!
Reply-to: mjl@locus.com
Organization: Locus Computing Corp./Boston, (617)229-4980
Date: Thu, 25 Aug 94 21:17:00 EDT
From: mjl@bosserv.bos.locus.com
Message-ID: <9408252117.aa29762@bosserv.bos.locus.com>
J.R. "Bob" Dobbs, Grand Master of the Knights of the Temple
by
Michael J. Leibensperger
Chapter 1: In the Holy Lands
Covered with weeks of grime and filth, wreaking not only of his own
sweat but also of those whom he had fucked, slain, and fucked and
slain, J.R. "Bob" Dobbs emerged from the tent of Al Hisrah-elam into
the blazing sun of Palestine. Before him, spread out around the palm
and jasmine of the oasis like tents around a dirty puddle of water,
lay the Saracen encampment. "Bob" grinned, squinting in the
glare---the Sale was as good as made. Hisrah-elam, fatigued from
round after round of heavy `frop smoking, had finally conceded: the
Temple would be occupied by SubTemplars that very night, and in
exchange, thirty lakh of the finest sun dried Habafropzipulops and
thirty-six Yeti virgins, their hymens preserved in handsomely
laminated wallet-sized plastic carrying cards, would be handed over at
moonrise. He strode to the watering hole, and every kaftan-veiled eye
was on him as he mounted his faithful stallion Po'buckr`e.
Who was this man---taken prisoner in the morning's raid against the
crusader fortifications, yea, even while he sat with his pants down in
the latrine---and how had he negotiated not only his own escape, but
also the return of the Temple to Xtian hands after months of bloody
and fruitless engagement? Tales circulated among the Saracen rank and
file, mysterious rumors of a smiling man from the West, a
shape-changer who, assuming the form the crusader commander, had
signed several suspicious real estate loan guarantees and then
vanished, to return weeks later clad only in a huke-lao shirt and a
pair of Bass Weejuns? These are not merely events of a remote and
dusty history; their repercussions echo even now---ask any West Bank
settler who sold him his title insurance!
To be continued... maybe...
(OK, so it's only two paragraphs. USE YOUR "BOB"DAMN IMAGINATIONS!)
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Message-Id: <9408252104.AA10972@thelonious.MIT.EDU>
From: "The Rt. Rev. Wor. Dr. Y. Foo, FRC" <dryfoo@mit.edu>
To: subgenius@mc.lcs.mit.edu
Subject: Well said!
Date: Thu, 25 Aug 1994 17:04:21 EDT
Ben `Cooter' Jones who is running for Congress against Newt `the Newt'
Gingrich in Georgia's 6th district, describes his opponent as having
"enough money to burn a wet dog."
Presumeably, Gingrich's staffers are saving this particular spectacle
until later in the campaign.
-- dr foo
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End of Subgenius Digest
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