Today's Topics:
How it really all began....
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Date: Fri, 23 Dec 94 16:32:20 PST
From: The BaG <thebag@sirius.uvic.ca>
Message-Id: <9412240032.AA05219@sirius.UVic.CA>
To: Subgenius@mc.lcs.mit.edu
Subject: How it really all began....
In the beginning, God created the heaven and the earth.
An the earth was without form, and void; and darkness was upon the face of the deep.
And God said "Let their be Light!"--and there was light.
And God saw the light, and was blinded.
And God said "Let their be less Light!"--and the light grew dimmer.
And God saw that the earth was without form, and was upset.
And God molded the earth into a ball, and set wrinkly bits upon it.
And God called the tops of the wrinkly bits mountians, and the bottoms he called valleys.
And God poured water over the earth, and called the water a great many different things, depending on how deep the water was, and how much area it covered.
And God saw what he had created, and became bored.
And God said "Let the waters bring forth abundantly the moving creatures that hath life, and fowl that may fly above the earth in the open firmament of Heaven!"
And God created the great whales, and every living creature that moveth, and saw them all starve to death.
And God said "Oops!"
And God brought forth from the earth grass, and herb, and fruit for the creatures to eat.
And God said "Let's try that again, shall we?"
And God said "Let us make man in our image, and let them have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over cattle, and over all the earth.
And God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he him, male and female created he them.
And God blessed them, and said unto them "Behold, I have given tou every herb, and fruit, and animal upon the earth, and to you it shall be meat"
And man was suitably impressed.
And man went forth, taking of the earth and subduing the creatures of the earth and making designer leather boots from them.
And God saw what he had made and was ashamed.
And God turned his back upon the earth and took up juggling.
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"The trouble with losing your mind is that you probably won't think to go
looking for it"
Ryan Guenther
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End of Subgenius Digest
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