Scientologist-SubGenius Kills Self

From: jesus@subgenius.com

Following is an excerpt from a story about Rev Philip Gale. Although a year old, still an important thing to know about. I implore you to read this story in its entirety. One of the reasons Rev. Gale gave for his "suicide" was that he was tired of living in mediocrity:

"In the end, it is that I am unwilling
(sick of living) to live in mediocrity.

Look, we're SubGeniuses, what separates Us from Them is that we REALIZE how stupid everyone and everything really is. Rev Gale KNEW he was the greatest living person, and I am sure you as a Sub know that he was wrong and that in reality YOU are the greatest living person. (You of course are wrong, because I am the greatest living person.)

The point is that we have the greatly depressing knowledge of the way things really are. Our only hope is to "pull the wool over our own eyes" and push on. No, the point is: DON'T KILL YOURSELF.

Rev. Gale was a major gear in the SubGenius machine, but didn't even know it. The fact is you probably are too. Even if it isn't as directly obvious as working in virtual reality at MIT, your part is vitally important. No matter what you are upset at, or disenchanted about, STAY ALIVE. If you need some reasons then tack these to your bulletin board:

1. The Conspiracy wants you dead. Your very existence threatens their Way. They would like nothing more then to see everyone of us take the MIT plunge.

2. Suicide is a mind-control initiative. If you feel suicidal it is definitely not your own thought. This is one of the easiest ways They have of eliminating us. If you want to kill yourself assume it is not *you* wanting it but *Them*.

3. The X-ists need you. Ok your soul is nothing more than a 30 second head rush for the X-ists, but damnit you're the CHOSEN CROP! Your death would be akin to flushing the good, sticky, Kind-Bud and leaving behind only the brown, dry, headache causing, Ditch-Weed.

4. The SubGenius needs you. Your life is vitally important to the SubGenius master plan.

5. "Bob" Loves You. Don't ask me why, but I'm sure I read that somewhere.

Rev. Stephen Pollack, the illuminated one, summed it best when he said. "The complete and utter destruction of the Conspiracy itself is reason alone for living."

So read the story, see if you think this was suicide. Perhaps you'll come to the obvious conclusion that someone wanted Rev. Gale removed, count the 23's, and above all else "Stay Happy."

Rev JC "Steve" Bevilacqua
The Lord

---New Times LA 1998

According to Ladner, Philip had abandoned his Scientology beliefs while he was at EarthLink. He had instead become enamored with the self-parodying Church of Sub Genius, which specializes in debunking cults and which has its own cult following among Gen-Xers.

Ladner gave Philip the group's tongue-in-cheek bible, Revelation X: The Church of Sub Genius, and they watched its "recruitment video" together. "It was hilarious," recalled Ladner recently at a Venice café. "There were certain things that really struck Philip. Both religions [Sub Genius and Scientology] sort of draw upon similar ideas. One has humor, one doesn't."

"Sub Genii" worship a pipe-smoking cartoon character named Bob Dobbs. Philip loved a line in the video about how Dobbs "once told L. Ron Hubbard, 'They may be pink, but their money's green,' " recalled Ladner. Philip even hung a Bob Dobbs poster on his office door at EarthLink.

<http://www.newtimesla.com/1999/042999/feature1-1.html> Therefore the victories of good warriors are not noted for cleverness or bravery. Therefore their victories in battle are not flukes. Their victories are not flukes because they position themselves where they will surely win, prevailing over those who
have already lost.
--Sun Tzu

Rev. J.C. "Steve" Bevilacqua
Business Manager
http://www.subgenius.com
Toll Free Ordainment/Mailorder (888)669-2323 Send $1 to:
The Church of the SubGenius, PO box 140306, Dallas, TX 75214.

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